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Do you unintentionaly drive away friends?

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Raptor
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12 Jul 2009, 5:26 pm

Homer_Bob wrote;

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I'm sure I do, I drive away those who aren't even my friends. The sad thing is I don't even know who my friends are. A few people have called me their friend but they might just be using the word very casually. I'm such a clueless social fool.


That's another thing. There can be a fine line between acquaintances and friends that I sometimes have a hard time seeing. That in itself has caused its fair share of grief.



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22 Jul 2009, 7:01 pm

These days the only people who attempt to befriend me are sociopaths or doorknocking evangelists who want me to join a closed community. I'm a christian so it's not the christianity I object to.



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22 Jul 2009, 7:39 pm

in answer to the question: oh my, yes.


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Cicely
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22 Jul 2009, 7:50 pm

I drive people away, both friends and acquaintances. The main thing is that I need so much time to myself; most people don't understand that and think I just don't like them. Sometimes I try to compensate for that and wind up acting kind of clingy.



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22 Jul 2009, 8:40 pm

Yashmeena wrote:
zer0netgain wrote:
I do the same. I called it "overcompensating."

I crave human interaction, but I'm so poor at it that it often goes bad. In the past, when I got in social situations, I would try to squeeze every last drop out of the experience, and I'm sure I came across as a nut many times. I have no doubt that pushed many people away from me. Kind of like a neglected dog that won't leave you alone because it's starved for affection.

There was also a time when I was mean to people. Not overtly (I never saw it until someone pointed it out to me), but I had a lot of pain from always being rejected. I grew comfortable with that pain and was actually fearful of being in a situation where someone liked me, so I subconsciously ensured a negative outcome because I knew how to deal with that pain.


This, entirely!
I'm so glad I'm not the only one with that. I always am overly friendly, to try to be friends with everyone like I used to be able to when very young. It has the opposite effect, needless to say. Works on the internet though, a lot of the time, strangely enough.. wish it was the other way 'round. I guess on the internet it makes me appear as though I have an energetic personality, but in rl makes me seem over enthusiastic. In rl people seem to like me more when I'm a bit more apathetic. Says something about people, I think. Or maybe not... :roll:



OMG! That is SO ME! I call and call and call and end up running people off (after getting kicked from College I heard that someone said the Psychology Teacher didn't know how to answer my questions so she was avoiding me so she didn't have to answer my questions.) :-( I tend to come on too strong. :-( Some interesting posts tonight!! ! Who cares what some professional says from everything I've read/heard on WP about AS and looking at my behavior and the comparisons (practically I make new ones EVERYDAY thanks to WP! I'm definently Aspie LOL! Also knowing there are other people like me out there helps me know I'm not alone. :-) (Now if only I could find perhaps an AS friend/boyfriend in RL AKA not IM. LOL!