Have you ever tried to tone down your special interest?
As far as my primary obsessions go, when it comes to music, I don't think people are bothered by it much, as music is a universal interest, and since I'm a musician, people may just brush it off as me being really into my work. One of my little talents is being able to name the artists behind many classic hit songs. Before, if I'd heard "Baba O'Reilly" by The Who on the radio for example, I might have spouted, "Oh- that song's by The Who, off their album 'Who's Next' released in 1971!" Now, I'd probably just say, "Oh, I love this song! The Who are awesome!"
Same thing with videogames. It's more fun to just shut up and play the game with a friend than go on about it.
As for my current rotating obsession, this time, it's "The Office". I'll watch at least a few episodes a day, as it's on several channels several times a day, and I have nearly the entire series downloaded anyway. I got one person to check it out, and I have a couple other friends who like it, but when I'm getting one-word answers in a conversation about something, I usually know they're not interested, and I drop it. I've learned from experience that people don't want to talk about the same thing for an extended length of time. It's not like they're trying to be hurtful, it's just that NT's hate repetition. They get tired of it easily. So I quietly enjoy the episodes in the privacy of my own room, and no one gets annoyed.
Does she like it too? Maybe she's a secret avid gamer and at 2 each morning she sneaks out of bed to play SONIC!! !! MWHAHA!
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"The natural world is the greatest source of excitement; the greatest source of visual beauty; the greatest source of intellectual interest. It is the greatest source of so much in life that makes life worth living." David Attenborough
My main interests (world religions and birds) have been with me going on 50 years. I'd be lost without them. But, I had an interest in chess for many years that I was told took over my every waking moment. So after awhile I gave it up, at least as far as everyone knows. I do play a game here and there on the internet. ![]()
CockneyRebel
Veteran
Joined: 17 Jul 2004
Age: 51
Gender: Male
Posts: 121,349
Location: In my own little country
I try to limit excessive discussion of my interests to groups of people who share the same interest. I talk about my interests in a more toned down fashion with people who might be curious to learn about the stuff I'm interested in.
But, no, I don't tone down my interests, and wouldn't want to. They're an asset. Pursuit of my interests motivates me to build skills and knowledge and meet people who have the same interests. I think my interests make me unique and productive, and help me to build and maintain a social life.
I guess what it comes down to is not how strong the interest is, but what you do with it. If it motivates you to do interesting things that no one else probably would have thought of or been motivated to do, that's great!
But, yes, it is wise to be aware of how much you're talking about it and whether or not whomever you're talking to is interested. Excessive talk about special interests can get annoying to anyone; it's like listening to someone talk about themself excessively.
In my experience, having something to show for it goes a lot farther (socially) than talking about it does, unless you're providing people with information they may appreciate.
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