List one Aspie thing you don't understand

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- Constant need to hijack a thread

Why I am freakishly good at something hard but almost idiot like with something mundane or easy?

Why does being touched freak me out so much while I see others craving to be touched reaching for some they do not even know?

Why I can't read people's body language. This has caused me to insult people, hit someone, miss out on a female hitting on several times, mistook a joke as fact, and made have numerous times made my parents upset.

Why I am so clumsy causing me to stagger when I walk sooner or later I am going to hit a bad bit of sidewalk and break my head open? This has happened to other people several times with leathal results here in Buffalo.

Why do I feel uneasy when people are trying to be nice to me?

Routines. Why must we have them? Why does it matter if we have to shower at eight o clock at night? It's not going to kill us to not do it at that time and we can do it at 11 at night. Why not do it at six o clock or seven o clock. Why must we be home to watch The Simpsons? Why not just TIVO it so we don't get anxious about missing the show. No internet, why must we get anxious without it, why not watch TV instead or play video games, there are other things to do than sitting behind the screen reading text or watching videos people downloaded or listening to songs. We can listen to music we have or listen to the radio. (talking about me here and I have loosened up about what time I need to shower and about needing to be home to watch shows and if the internet isn't working, I try and do other things and be flexible)

Why am I always anxious to go home and why can't I just enjoy my time in the store shopping and looking for what I need?

How I can be so good at something at one point, and, at something that most people know how to do (i.e. unlocking doors, telling a lie), I fail epically.

How I can use large, substantial words with my erudite, linguistic skills, and, a few seconds later, say that I don't get something in a joke or something like that.

How nobody but my semi-otaku sister and Tevvy (my friend from seventh grade) understand my inside jokes.

How we don't understand NT's (that one's a joke).

How the NT's sometimes make fun or cajole us for being ourselves (I don't have anything against NT's as my sister is one, and some of them are nice).

Why I am incredible, amazing in areas no one else is, yet I can't do simple tasks.

How come I speak in monotone? That's what I don't understand. I'm okay with my voice. I just want to know why people on the spectrum speak in monotone, while NTs don't.

I'm also guilty of the whole "I'm a master of difficult things but suck balls at the easy stuff". I think it's cuz when I'm doing nothing but overanalyzing everything and stressing the details, I neglect everything else. That's probably why smart people are usually socially inept. If you spend most of your time doing or thinking about non social things, you're neglecting your social skills.

I find when I'm not analyzing everything to death, it's much easier for me to think on my feet. That and not everything is meant to be analyzed.

I think the two things that frustrate me the most are:

1. how I can jump into a conversation, talk excitedly on and on about something, completely dazzle/overwhelm/exhaust everyone listening with everything I know about said subject, but completely forget to mention my name or ask/catch anyone else's name

2. my verbosity and need to explain everything thoroughly, by my own idea of thoroughness. Is there an off switch? I swear, sometimes, I don't even start commenting on something online or in person because I don't think I have the energy to type/say all the stuff I know I will want to type/say and can't help myself from typing/saying. So I'm either Ms. TMI or I'm a mute. I can't find a happy medium.

Aspies who hate themselves. NTs do, too. But aspies hate themselves sometimes for being aspies, which is sad, because it's not exactly something worth hating.

Oh, this shoudl be on the top of my list, because it's been the hardest thing to deal with in my adult life:

Why is it so hard, so very, painfully, agonizingly hard for me to deal with things that don't "interest" me? It's like my brain just revolts against me or it turns into molasses with a side of depression. I have had jobs where it got so bad, doing work that my brain didn't like, that I would have to go into the bathroom and sob uncontrollably. And it leaves me in a cognitive stupor aferwards so I have trouble focusing on things that do stimulate me.

My mother, who has never accepted my dx, just tells me over and over, "Just deal with it. We all have to do work we don't enjoy." But it's not about enjoyment--it's about how my brain is wired. I don't enjoy cleaning out the litterboxes, but my brain connects that with my cats, which my brain finds stimulating, so it's not an issue for me. It's work that my brain can't connect to anything it finds stimulating in a good way. And I have yet to find a job that didn't involve that as a major bulk of the worklaod. I don't know how I'm going to survive if I can't figure out of away to cope with this better.

how thinking about problems that seem unsolvable only cements them further as unsolvable, does not untangle them.

so the sticky thought loops .. over and around again. something must be this way and i cannot conceive of it being another way.

and yet when other people act this way it irritates me that they are not listening to reason.