do people think you're "stupid"?

Post Reply New Topic

Hmm... I was labeled gifted as a kid, but I could never keep up with other "gifted" kids, nor did I even fit in with most autistic "gifted" people I knew. I think in my case it was a response to some stuff like reading that I could do when tested at an age other kids couldn't. But I've been tested twice since early childhood (once in early adolescence, once in early adulthood), and never hit that level again at all. I think other kids "caught up" in the areas that usually count for things like that -- so it was more that I developed on a wholly different path that there are no tests for and therefore all tests are going to skew in any direction possible pretty much, rather than other people I've known who consistently test as gifted.

There is little doubt that behind my back I've been called stupid, and worse. But, reflecting on the circumstances, I realize that most of these are people with whom I didn't want to associate with in the first place. The setting was usually a place where people socialize and party - places I avoid if at all possible.

OTOH, I have had many people who know me comment that I should have been an engineer. (I'm not, I was just a factory rat.) And some years ago I spent a lot of time in a hospital because our teenage daughter was being treated for a very aggressive cancer. Because we were at one of the top research hospitals in the country, I was surrounded by very smart people like doctors, nurses and researchers. Because I had ample time to think and research, I would often have questions when the medical team made rounds. On many occasions I was asked if I was an engineer.

So, my conclusion is that when I'm in a social setting where quick thinking and boisterous behavior is valued, I'm probably considered stupid. But, when I'm in the company of a couple of people who are very smart and I've had time to research the subject at hand, I'm not considered all that dumb.

Although an M.D.'s mean IQ is around 125, I would suspect many doctors are into helping as in a 'crusade,' and probably are not broad in a scholarly sense. And I think one can be intelligent and not creative by being bounded in symmetrical thinking.

I am not sure what you mean by this?

Most people don't call me stupid outright, but I have noticed remarks that suggest some people think I am.

I cared when I was a kid, and even started to believe them. Not anymore. I know I'm not stupid. Their perceptions are their own and not my concern.

@V. and Kf.

Just a general observation on "our" perceptions of a difference in individuals, and in this particular area of that modular cognitive concept we call "intelligence."

Last edited by Mdyar on 14 Mar 2011, 1:44 am, edited 1 time in total.

i used to get that a lot, some people in junior high would come out and call me dumb/stupid/retarted. In high school people would make condesending jokes as you have told about, sounds very similar. As an adult I am very over reactive and become slighted at the smallest suggestion because I am paranoid of past jokes like this. It has gotten better as I got older though, plus I have made myself look scary so most people would be afraid to say things like that anymore. Though I didn't want to look scary just big and strong- not scary....but that's how they see me so be it. Anyways...best solution is hang out with those who are your real friends, no sense in wasting time with people who are not legimate in their desire to get to know you and people who make subtle jokes probably are not thinking of your best interests but rather the best angle to belittle you in front of friends.

Last edited by liveandletdie on 14 Mar 2011, 2:15 pm, edited 1 time in total.

I am still confused, but an explanation is probably not necessary.

Edit: Oh, wait, were you replying to kfisherx's post? Makes a lot more sense in that context.

Last edited by Verdandi on 14 Mar 2011, 1:32 pm, edited 1 time in total.

I agree RE most MDs and PhDs and mean IQ. That said my psychologist has a measured IQ of 145 and does IQ measurements and estimations for court cases all the time and as such has a very in-depth knowledge of the subject matter at hand. (AKA he knows the IQ business) I will never forget the day he said he has never before met anyone who could beat him at his game until I walked in the door. The look on his face was actually priceless as he just looked at me with a deer-in-the-headlights look after my dissertation to him from my homework and said, "I have to admit I am a little intimidated here." Then he quickly added, "It's a good thing but I am a bit in shock" Then he looked at me and smirked and said, "And I get the sense that you are sitting there just a little bit proud of yourself right now" I have to admit I was actually sitting there feeling a tiny bit smug because I had just laid him out but I was more shocked than smug as I did not think my work was THAT awesome. The exchange and that session was a "pivitol" moment in my life as it was where I finally was shown the power of my gift in this area. He then went on to do a battery of IQ discussions and tests with me to help me formalize this knowledge and accept it. It was all very cool stuff and probably more impactful to my life than even my ASD dx.

i had a coworker who would contantly get sarcastic and impatient with me and once, when i asked a rhetorical question, she answered "to make people like you ask questions"

People who know me well tell me I'm very intelligent. Strangers have a tendency to treat me like I'm mentally ret*d, especially if they find out I'm on the autistic spectrum without knowing anything else about me.

The same is with me. General NTs who do not know my scientific ability would think that I lack something, yes I did lack social abilities, but I also had talent in science which they would not have any opportunity to see in me. Now, after years of retrospection, I have figured out theory of mind, social awareness and what I call local language skills. I don't know how it happened but now I have intuitively become NT like. You can say that I'm now have a extended phenotype or partial asperger's.

Do people think I'm stupid? Probably. I don't care much anymore though

Interesting description.^

You've probably outgrown the Dx then? Interestingly, there was one scientist here that missed a formal Dx by literally one point--it's probable he would have had "one" earlier in his life.

I get called stupid often by friends and past friends. It's due to peculiar way of addressing things.

Yes I have outgrown it. Now, I can easily pass off as a bit of a nerdy NT I had to be very creative to understand the bad social interactions I went through, NTs get these things intuitively.

Last edited by daspie on 14 Mar 2011, 11:28 pm, edited 2 times in total.