Is bullying good?

Post Reply New Topic

Dont make this my special interest

I wouldn't say it is "good" but it does serve a purpose.

Bullies are people who rule by threat of force. A young kid confronted with a bully has the opportunity to learn how to deal with it.

It establishes a social order.

Most cower before a bully, and such wind up always doing so when confronted by someone stronger.

Some learn to stand up for themselves, fail or succeed. The bully learns they can't push that person around, and such grow up to believe in themselves.

This is nothing but a pseudo-Darwinian rationalization.

The truth is that like any other form of abuse, bullying is damaging and traumatizing and leaves people with psychological scars, sometimes lifelong. Never mind driving some to suicide before they live that long. Bullying doesn't serve a social purpose, as it doesn't really teach anyone how to stand up for themselves. It does the opposite. It also teaches the bullies that violent, antisocial behavior goes unpunished, which is not actually true once they get out of school environments that passively allow children and teens to break the law and assault, harass, batter, and abuse other children and teens. Bullying is a sickness (metaphorically), nothing more.

Yes I agree. Thats how it is for people who are not like me. That means most people.

For me bullying is superfluous. It has no effect on me other than hurting.

I "cowered" before my bullies, but this was a defence mechanism similar to a battered wife involved in an abusive relationship, and it doesn't make me any weaker than the bullies who assailed me.

The very fact that I endure despite the brutality inflicted upon me speak volumes of my inner strength and resilience, so your argument is rendered null and void.

I'm just trying to figure out why you would ask this question because that is a little odd to ask.
Did you originally think that bullying gives you deep skin? (meaning it toughens you up)?

If so I still don't see any benefit from it. If I wanted deep skin I'd join the military and have a drill sergeant scream at me for twelve hours of the day. The problem with bullies is that it is personal instead of trying to harden you for the real world. It also damages you because this usually happens in your childhood, the last place where it needs to happen for a person with AS.

This is the point.

Because it doesnt change "how I believe in myself or others" if I would bully anyone or if I get bullied myself.

Bullying is manipulation because the "belief in oneself because of it" is built on air. The outcome of bullying is that the bully feels great for animalic reasons, and the contribution is egoistic because he/she will be the only person to feel that way and very likely somebody else will suffer.

Pointing out criticism, with the ability to still have respect could be more useful as it gives the opportunity to develop mutually.

Agree. zer0netgain's logic is a circular one-"Because bullying teaches us to stand up to bullies therefore it is right".
Also, I believe that we must fight bullies, verbally or physically (if they take the first action) and not cower.

Last edited by daspie on 27 Sep 2011, 9:00 am, edited 1 time in total.

No bully has ever contributed to the reason why I stand up to anyone.

I usually give the right question in the right moment instead of descending to the irrationalism of fighting them.

Last bully I met gave me high five after 30 seconds. He was a little confused though.

I even gave a Nazi the right question once. It made the little brain think a little.

Maje, I was just showing how zer's logic was circular and not promulgating it. By fighting I did not necessarily meant physical fight.

Aha, I was confused by "...and therefore it is right".

you're right, its circular. It has no other purpose than a doom loop.

This is very obvious. Bullying is a like a weapon of mass destruction. Every time I was bullied and/or teased, I felt like a knife was piercing through my flesh with extreme pain. It made me feel emotionally uncomfortable and angry. Bullying has also made other kids and teens anguish, feel like they are worthless and stupid, and commit suicide.

So if you were aware that a bunch of guys with AS and autism were painfully bullied before, there was absolutely no need to ask this kind of question in this message board.

I do not like bullying. I have no joy from being bullied, nor desire to inflict that sort of agony on other people. Bullying is not good. Bullying is not fun. I think bullies should try to understand how their actions effect others, and care about having a negative effect on others.

I am curious as to why you would ask if people like bullying on a forum in which most people were/ are being bullied.

I suffer from post- traumatic stress disorder from the bullying I received while attending public school. My bullies were both students and teachers.

i think that bullies are sometimes sociopaths and therefore cannot be taught to care as they have no conscience.

some other bullies are ex-victims (of peers or family members) who get a chip on their shoulder and turn into bullies themselves (or they may go "postal" in some isolated cases). their view of the world turns hard and jaded.

i don't know think the first type of bully can be changed, but i think that by protecting and educating victims we can prevent some of the second type from forming. i'd say bullying is quite bad for the obvious reasons of the pain they cause, but also they seem to create more bullies in their wake. nothing good can come from that.

there are probably many other ways that bullies come into existence, of course. but these two are ones that i've seen myself.

No...that is one of the reasons I am so messed up in the head, it makes me angry.

This.
I do not see any purpose in bullying either. Lucky for me I survived school without getting seriously bullied, and I never teased or bullied anyone either. In college the whole group were bullying a boy with learning difficulties, not because he had learning difficulties, but because he dressed up like a girl but wasn't gay (so they all called him a ''poof''). They took the mickey out of him right in front of him, and he got so upset but they just bullied him all the more. One of the girls even threw empty bottles at his head, humiliating him in front of the whole canteen. I was sitting with these girls, but I felt really sorry for this boy, even though I didn't like him that much because he had said some disgusting things to me through text, like sexually disgusting things, and he didn't let up even after I told him I have a boyfriend and that he shouldn't write smutty dirty things like that. But he was harmless otherwise, and when the girls were all being so nasty to him, I imagined what it would be like if I was in his shoes, and I felt upset for him. I didn't really see the purpose in all that bullying.