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should we aspies imitate neurotypicals?

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camelCase
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17 Jan 2012, 9:48 pm

EBartleby wrote:

camelCase wrote:

Define better. I find this 100% subjective. Is better whoring yourself out to get what you need? Or is better being true to yourself?

You find it subjective because it is. Neither of the options you list are ''better''. I would personally say that integrity (not whoring yourself) is most important in life, but then again I would not be able to justify this with an easy argument. In the end, there are 0 correct answers in this thread and you gotta go with what you want yourself. (I know this is hard, I have difficulty knowing what I want myself.)

My vote's for limited compromising, imitating only when needed to get by. My answer is never going to be proven better, though. It's not the kind of thing you can represent with a pie chart, eh

I need a god damn technical manual or field manual for everything D:

RushKing
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17 Jan 2012, 10:10 pm

NTs should stop forcing me to imitate them. We accommodate for them allot more than they accommodate for us.

EBartleby
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17 Jan 2012, 10:20 pm

RushKing wrote:

NTs should stop forcing me to imitate them. We accommodate for them allot more than they accommodate for us.

True enough. But if you (or I) end up in a ditch because of a failure to comply to some rules here and there...who will be left to fight against that kind of inequality?

Sweetleaf
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17 Jan 2012, 10:21 pm

RobotGreenAlien2 wrote:

you should learn how to do it. make basic facial expressions small talk ect. but you should choose for youself from moment to moment.

for professional stuff i do it a lot. with my friends i more...translate. i fake facial expressions and intonation to bring out the real me as opposed to being someone else

Why should I? I am quite fine with my limited range of facial expressions and my dislike for useless small talk.

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Aldran
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18 Jan 2012, 10:25 am

gyaspie wrote:

should we aspies imitate neurotypicals?

I don't think "Should" is actually a word that ever does anybody much specific good when used in a sentence about Human Behavior.... After all, Aspergers and Autism were *Discovered* as a result of the fact that certain individual were not behaving the way others thought they *Should*...... People are how they are, often at their own choosing, for reasons they have chosen, NTs, Aspies, Auts, anyone with enough consciousness of their real time situation with the world around them and others in it......

We can discuss endlessly what we actually do in this matter personally, but at the end of the day, in every situation where imitation is possible, someone with aspergers is going to make a choice, even if in ignorance, to imitate or not, the person they're with or people they've been with or seen before. As will NT's.

So, not to "imitate" a college Valedictorian, a famous author, or anyone else who's used this line before, I will end by saying simply:
The Choice is Yours......
Aldran

RobotGreenAlien2
Toucan
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22 Jan 2012, 6:04 pm

Why should you!?
I'm a pragmatist. To get a job. To keep it. To talk to girls.To clear customs. to blow their minds about being a successful aspie when you come out.

You can stick to your ideal (excuse) and be the dependant person they think you are or you can succeed and realy show them.

sorry to be harsh by you don't need to be enabled.

Who_Am_I
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22 Jan 2012, 9:23 pm

Of course we should.
Every day, we should pick a neurotypical person, stand in front of them, and imitate their every word and gesture.

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Authentic cadence: V-I
Plagal cadence: IV-I
Deceptive cadence: V- ANYTHING BUT I ! !! !
Beethoven cadence: V-I-V-I-V-V-V-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I
-I-I-I-I-I-I-I-I! I! I! I I I

aussiebloke
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22 Jan 2012, 9:41 pm

If your not cleaning toliet cubicals at 3 am how else are you going to hold on to a job ?

With a average IQ that is....

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aussiebloke
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23 Jan 2012, 9:14 pm

If you want to get laid yes or you can overcompensate like some of the aspie men here and become materially successful (why else would they do this) why would they want so much money when 98% of the crap advertised is of no use or need to us)

If I've been sexist I'll take this down, how is it I've just stated factual information .

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CockneyRebel
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24 Jan 2012, 10:08 am

Why would I wish to imitate people that I wish to have nothing in common with? It seems pretty pointless to me. I don't wish to pretend to be something that I'm not. I'm not bending backwards for the NT World, anymore. The NT World has never bent backwards for me, so why would I do the same for them.

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CockneyRebel
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24 Jan 2012, 10:11 am

One more thing, and you all knew this was coming:

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=s9GQWqYAkhM[/youtube]

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theaspiemusician
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24 Jan 2012, 7:57 pm

To a certain extent but not to the point where we stop being who we are.

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Hmmm...interesting. Shows what you know about Aspies, doesn't it rofl?

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Sweetleaf
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24 Jan 2012, 8:03 pm

RobotGreenAlien2 wrote:

Why should you!?
I'm a pragmatist. To get a job. To keep it. To talk to girls.To clear customs. to blow their minds about being a successful aspie when you come out.

You can stick to your ideal (excuse) and be the dependant person they think you are or you can succeed and realy show them.

sorry to be harsh by you don't need to be enabled.

Keep what? and in my case it would be talk to guys but I seem to have no trouble with that really. Also to me success in this sick society is not something I'm much into regardless of who's mind it would blow.

I don't see how not imitating neurotypicals would make me dependent?....I do have some problems with figuring out how the hell I am to survive and such but as much as I might get down on myself I do have some skills that could prove helpful in my life. And you're right I don't need your permission or anyone else to enable myself to live on my own terms rather then become a sheep and/or complain when I'm fed up with things.

lol and what are you suggesting I need dis-abled because that's the opposite of enable.

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marshall
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24 Jan 2012, 10:21 pm

Basic social skills and politeness I'm fine with. It's not all natural to me but I can work at that stuff. I'm never going to become a blabber-mouthed frat-boy douchebag or smarmy gladhander though. Not that that's even a possibility. Eeeww!

I'll always be on the quiet side and not be the most proficient talker. I'm a thinker, not a gabber. Professionally I'd prefer to just try to be as straight and matter-of-fact as possible and not let anyone think I'm someone to be walked over. I'm not comfortable exaggerating s**t in order to "sell myself" though. If an interviewer wants that f**k'em.

RobotGreenAlien2
Toucan
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25 Apr 2012, 8:46 pm

No I mean it as it is defined:

Quote:

In a negative sense, enabling is also used in the context of problematic behavior, to signify dysfunctional approaches that are intended to help but in fact may perpetuate a problem.[1][2] A common theme of enabling in this latter sense is that third parties take responsibility, blame, or make accommodations for a person's harmful conduct (often with the best of intentions, or from fear or insecurity which inhibits action). The practical effect is that the person himself or herself does not have to do so, and is shielded from awareness of the harm it may do, and the need or pressure to change. It is a major environmental cause of addiction.[3]

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