169Kitty wrote:
I did do a bit of Google searching and it appears that difficulty in asking for help is common in Asperger's because sometimes they don't know how to ask or recognize when to ask. However clinical writing does not always correlate with real world experience. So I thought I'd ask all of you if you have or had problems asking for help.
Yes, I too have a lot of trouble asking for help. But the reason you quoted is plain wrong; it really shows how NT people are truly incapable of understanding the way AS people think.
We *know* how to ask. We *recognize* when to ask. We just don't *want* help, even if we need it.
Our instincts are simply different. We're much more individualistic. Being treated as inferior for most of our lives only increases this instinctive aversion to help.
This neatly ties into the Neanderthal theory: They used to live in small social groups, and they used to go out hunting alone. So they needed to be able to fend for themselves. If they got hurt, the last thing they'd want to do is attract the attention of nearby predators. If they really did need help, the only way to get it was to make it home by themselves, and then get the needed help there. Within the small social group, help was given freely, without any need to ask, because they knew each other well enough to just know.