How Would You Describe Your Social Separateness?

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I can also describe my inner world as something that was once a "Fortress" but its now a prison. Made of glass, of course. Shatterproof glass...

Matthew

OK I'll bite. The stuff we can reach... what's the limit to how far down it came from? And how much does anyone know about what's further down than that? Something useful might be down there that's worth developing tools to reach?



Ha, that's the thing that really gets me at work. I'm either sucked into something and getting jolted by questions about completely unrelated things that I really don't give a rats ass about but am expected to know everything there is to know about it anyway, or I'm trying to get sucked into something and failing because I'm too hyperaware of all the people around that might take it into their heads to come check up on me or ask me something.

And then when I want to connect with other people, they're busy doing something else. And when they want to reach out to me, I can't for the life of me get into the right mindset to respond with anything other than "going through the motions"...

Sometimes it feels like being stuck in a time-warp....everyone else is talking, moving, speaking, etc faster than I ever could, so I understand virtually nothing but the dramatic and drawn-out things.

My social separateness is like this:

I contact people from school and work via phone, email, and facebook, but they never reply to my messages. I also ask them if we could hang out sometime, but they will say that they are very busy with some important things or will plan to hang out other people that they find more important or interesting. Those people never invite me to get together with them.

I don't have trouble having conversations with a few acquaintances during lunch at school or work, but their reluctance to socially connect and hang out with me has made me feel like a social reject. During the weekends and holidays, I'm in my house watching TV, playing video games, lifting weights, etc. I also go to the movies on occasion (only if there's a good movie out).

This cheers me up.

Yeah, this sums it up pretty well. I even have to think about my interests it in my head if I have to stay in the company of others for a longer time.

Ooooh, "social mode". I love that. It's so exhausting. To other people this must seem the only way to be.

I think these days, I can tell whether a person would be able to "deal with me". I can even be with people who will never get me, but who are generally nice. Even if just on the surface. If I start thinking about what other people might think about me... it just makes me paranoid.


I prefer reading. Parties have never interested me.

This.

I have a delayed social reaction time, so I find it hard to keep up with group social chatter sometimes. Although I've gotten better at it through exposure, I'll have "brain farts" where I'll miss something going on, not because I'm not trying my hardest to pay attention, but because my attention itself is very fragmented.

When I first began socializing, I felt like I could only concentrate on the words people are saying or how I was nonverbally coming across, and not both at once. Sometimes, when I try too hard to focus on other people, I become less aware of my body in space: I'll become clumsier, for instance, dropping things and forgetting my coat/purse/etc.

Although I pride myself in fitting in when situations call for it, I feel like I have to concentrate ten times harder than everyone else to do so.

DIDO The only type of people I can seem to comunicate well with are enginers, because they are in general are logic driven, detail oriented and well educated in there intrest.

This. So much!

Actually I like talking to people, that is, my friends whom I've known for a while and I know that we have something to talk about, but I find it extremely hard listening to what they are saying for more than a few minutes. And mostly I can only have a conversation with one, or maximum two people at once. I cannot process what they are saying and come up with an appropriate answer at the same time without interrupting them. After a while my head just hurts and I need a break.
I also prefer talking about a (general, non-special interest) topic where I know roughly how they are going to reply and what they have to say. I find it hard to listen to a complete new set of thoughts because I might not know how to respond.

I also find it difficult to respond to people telling me about what they have accomplished.. I don't know what to say because I don't care much about whatever it is they've done or what it is they get so excited about.

Whatever, in most social situations I'm like Homer Simpson.

THIS.

And people look at you in a strange way and it just pisses me off. Usually, I just leave the room because I feel so offended. Even if I told them how offensive I find it when they ridicule me like that, I expect them to say stuff like, "It's your FAULT that people make fun of you". It is why I cannot take myself serious most of the time because people will always find a fault in me. I prefer being alone in the kitchen and doing my stuff without interruption.


Sometimes I even feel that what they have accomplished is quite worrying. ^^ Everything related to relationships, basically, because usually people just follow social convention and I do not understand.