Do others regard you as pompous?

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That is horrible that the hive mind forces you to dumb down your transfer of information in favor of being more serving of the perceived hierarchal positions of the identities of others.

This is yet another great example of social punishment and rewards based on one's conformity to the rules of the hive mind, and the ordered operation within hierarchies.

People do NOT think I'm pompous. I'm not that intelligent, I'm quiet, I try to be nice & respectful, & I'm open minded.

Oh, you think you're nice, respectful, and open-minded. You must think you're better than me.
Therefore you are pompous.

I wouldn't be so sure about how people might be thinking of you.
I've been wrong many times in the past because I don't do that bit of identity based "reasoning" above, but most people I know do.

Wow, your instructors had major inferiority complexes at work. Most of my college professors loved my use of jargon and precision syntax. The college classroom is the only place I've ever felt welcome.

As for the post I have no idea how others view me, but I've never been called pompous. I've had a few people say "you don't know everything." My reply in those situations is purposefully pompous: "True. But I spend hours each day studying to increase my understanding and knowledge, do you? Exactly. So who do you think has a higher chance of being correct? I'm always up for a competition if you want to test your knowledge base against mine." This is obviously not the "socially appropriate" way of handling the situation but it shuts up the vast majority of people. Besides, the ol' "you don't know everything" tactic is mainly employed when you're arguing evidence to another person's uneducated opinion and the socially inappropriate response highlights that.

Yes...and I am. I can't help it.

I got called arrogant. I think it generally makes NT people uncomfortable if they don't know what you're thinking. They're always trying to find out what you're thinking and they will always be trying to determine that from your words and body language.

So the blank stares we give, or the quietness, or the words they don't understand, instead of assigning neutral value to it as we intend, they are hard-wired to assign some meaning to it because that's what they do, they communicate their feelings about others in subtext, so they think we're doing the same. They're trying to figure out who's above who in rank and wondering what I'm saying about them when I talk, even if I have no intention of saying anything about them.

If I have no intention of communicating anything about them, thinking I'm "relating" through the fact that we're conversing, that is still read as coldness, because I'm not engaging them through my words or body language. Coldness is interpreted by the NT as pompous and arrogant, therefore, my attitude is read as such. Or if I'm using complex, precise words, it is interpreted by them as what they'd be doing if they used those words: trying to look smarter than they really are, therefore pompous and arrogant. They can't understand a situation where someone would talk like that just for the sake of being clear in conversation.

Yes, exactly.
They are unable to perceive anything outside of the social filters that they have always been embedded within and an active part of.

Some people think I am. They also claim that this is because of my intolerance towards certain people. Funny, that intolerance is usually towards those who treat autistics like crap, including those who think I'm pompous. I could are less at this point.

Even my own loving Fiancee recently told me how while she knows better, I come across as pompous and arrogant. I still can't figure out why even after she tried explaining it. For example, I mentioned to someone I got a 96 average in my recent college courses and I was later told that was pompous and arrogant. WTF? It's an objective fact!

Yes, and objective facts shared within a social context without being transmitted in relational terms by use of inclusive and inviting wording and body language will be perceived as cold, and therefore pompous and arrogant. Not saying it's right or wrong, but I learned the hard way that this is just the playing field that's out there. Watch a video of Richard Feynman teaching, and you'll see someone overcoming the potential barriers of facts by injecting a relational tone to them.

Objective facts hold no bridge-building power in relationship. And an NT will always be extracting "relationship" data from anything we say, either to determine status or subtext or whether you're trying to include them or exclude them with what we say. Because that's how they're hard-wired. The non-science world loved Feynman (and Carl Sagan) because they were able to build that bridge beyond facts to make it a sharing relationship.

There is no dispassionate fact-sharing in the NT world unless you're content with being regarded as a lifeless robot. Or being called a poindexter. That's how they will see us because they inject their hierarchical perspective and relationship seeking into every interaction they have. And if they see you as someone who shares facts and doesn't care how that will affect them, they'll interpret that as pompous or arrogant or conceited.

Maybe this is why I get along so well with children, particularly babies and toddlers so well. No hidden meanings, no interpretations, and they actually like to learn facts and knowledge. How the %$#^ are you supposed to "care about" how an objective, verifiable fact makes someone feel? It is what it is?

Wrong planet indeed.

Oddly enough, not in real life because I come across as warm face-to face. Online I probably come across as colder and probably pompous when I'm expounding on my opinions in a deep-level way that you normally don't really get into in-depth in many real life conversations, or even if you do, facial expressions, tone of voice and body language can help your friend see that your opinions and beliefs about deep stuff are not as ass-like as they would sound "on paper."
Having said that, sometimes I'm deliberately being an ass because something or someone has pissed me off, lol.

My family tells me that it's my fault for them acting pompous. I try not to act pompous, but my family expects me to act pompous in the same manner they do.

i'm not pompous. i talk / express myself too little to be considered pompous or not pompous or anything at all. in writing essays i use a lot of long words and copy the kind of formal language that's in things i read, but that's what you're supposed to do in an essay, so i don't think that counts. i place a high value on my intelligence but i don't show it off a lot.

Depends on the context, to some degree. But generally, yes, that's it. Like the example you provided of sharing a test score. I remember people playing guessing games to make it into a relational activity instead of just telling each other their score. One approach conveys no interest or care about the listener. The other involves them and indicates caring and development of their relationship.

I learned this in business communications. I couldn't understand why I was getting such disinterested responses, and I finally realized that even in what could otherwise be straight-forward business interactions, they were getting upset because I was just dispensing information to them, instead of including words and tone that "warmed up" the dialogue.

If it's an established friend, you can share more directly more often and they'll still know that you're concerned about them and care about them. But for those who don't know you well, or know in a business setting, they're "feeling" the impact of your words and evaluating it for intent and content.

Even here at WP, some people feel they're unpopular members. But even among autistics here, if you look through the posts of the popular people, they're engaging others and offering relational material in their posts. If you don't feel wanted by someone, you're not going to be interested in being around them. I think autistics are more prone to gravitate to those who share information of interest, where NTs desire relationship and communicate this interest as kind of a carrier wave onto the words they use to interact. It's a hard-learned lesson, one I wish I'd known years ago.