I don't wanna be autistic anymore

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Sorry i read a few posts such as the Op and a few more but not all..

Firstly my friend you mentioned you were sick of being Autistic.. Is that word anywhere in your birth certificate? I dont believe so.. You have fallen for the same false media hype as those that sucked into the belief of what they hear. You are an individual, an important individual! i know times can be extremely tough, but dont use the autistic label to identify yourself, you are your own person. Aspies, auties, whatever, have been around long in history, many creating ideas, philosophies, inventions that have built the world we live in today... many Shaman cultures only allow those on the spectrum as right of passage to become a shaman, as they feel its important to be connected to the pains knowone else feels to see the world in a totally different light from anyone else, these cultures are some of the oldest in the world, so i assume they know a thing or two. Its only todays media that is impartial to the understanding, as people fear what they dont understand, NT's compete against each other all the time concentrating on beating their neighbor to get a bigger satellite disk, while the aspie is working out how to create the signals to get to their devices. Men have different brain structures from women as do those on the spectrum. Its only a big deal if you want it to be a big deal Dont spend too much wasted time on worrying, its futile, destructive and non constructive, it only feeds the inner anguish as a self fulfilled prophecy.... I for one despite the pure hells i have gone through, from assaults, beatings, sexual abuse, ostracized, used manipulated, deceived.. to spend my life concentrating on the past that was out of my control i am setting myself up for future failure. We are ALL geniuses, whether you agree or not, life changing things can come to you when you least expect it, and this has happened to me on a number of occasions, when i i felt the lowest in my life, i always grasp onto hope! you really never know whats going to happen tomorrow, and if its not tomorow it could be the next day. wouldnt it be a shame that you took the early flight only for something dramatically great to pass by unexpected! I for one wouldnt want to change, for if i did id have no idea what i would change to! But i do know the type of person i am and always have been!. I will go out my way when most will just watch, i will help others in need, even my psychologist cant work out why i didnt evolve towards a prison cell! Its part choice and part who i am, and despite all the crap, i pick myself up again and give it another go! no, its not easy and yes it does feel like climbing an upward steep mountain, but i think the gift of life is worth it, and whatever shape, form size you come into this world in, its a bloody miracle when you look at the cosmic view of things... The sky starts at your feet. start looking up! You obviously have alot of emotion in this area, then use it and use it wisely, put that frustration and pent up energy into something positive rather than feeding the hungry inner troll. You are not worthless, you are meaningful in everyway and its each individuals choice to find their own gifts... If i was to believe what i hear as ""fact"", one would assume those on the spectrum dont feel empathy, or they dont care, or they all dont like fiction.. The proverbial crap goes on and on, but YOU have the power to change that if you want to. Dont admit defeat and cave in and be walked over, get back up and forge ahead! You are not worthless!! ! you are worthwhile! Yes i have vented my emotions on here a few times, but i do my best to get back up again, and yes its good to vent, vent it all out, release some of that anger, that sadness and refuel yourself with new fuel that you can go out and do the things people say you cant do! i have had that all my life, it used to get me down and id give in and admit defeat, but noticed i was going in the same circle, now i have changed that around and the more someone says i cant do something the more it fuels me to prove them wrong and prove to myself i can do it! You just have to believe in yourself not let other people use their beliefs to control you! I only say all of this with utmost sincerity and love! because i truly believe you and every one here is worth it!

Everyone - EVERYONE - is handicapped or disabled in one way or another. Over the six decades I have lived so far, I have come to accept this idea and appreciate each individual's uniqueness. I have come to deeply admire people who overcome - like Christopher Reeve, who after becoming quadriplegic and paralyzed from the neck down, continued to do voice-overs in animated films, directed, and became a powerful (and handsome!) advocate for spinal cord research and patient financial support. We have to deeply admire Stephen Hawking, and his continuing to work as a theoretical physicist although disabled as much as Christopher Reeve - total paralysis, and unlike Chris, can't even talk - and yet is very influential in his field.

Maybe my appreciation is deepened by having an acquired physical disability in addition to a lifelong mild autism condition (probably would be diagnosed Aspergers except I was diagnosed in DSM V-land).

I also have known two cases of "miracle" medical outcomes in people who were expected to die, and didn't ... and that too deepens my appreciation.

It takes courage to continually look for and appreciate inspiration, but it feels SO MUCH MORE POWERFUL than keeping an eagle eye on how unfair things are, how unlucky some folks (including oneself) are, and how hopeless life looks.

Put THAT in a pill and swallow it.

It doesn't have to be that way- I don't think.

I know people have very negative stereotypes about autistic people and don't even get to know them before judging or thinking that autism = incompetent & stupid forever until the end of time at all things social (and maybe some others that people like to lump in).
But that's just not true. It doesn't have to be true.
I feel like one's autism diagnosis should be used as a tool for self-reflection & learning how to live as yourself (perhaps armed with knowledge of how your specific neurology functions differently from the "norm") but it should never be something that disenfranchises you.
You are you and can still do so many things!!
Now, lots of things may be harder, but lots of people everywhere in the world have different cards they are dealt. Some people are born in poor war-torn countries, some people are born without legs, some people are born into immensely wealthy well-off families that smooth all obstacles for them, some people are born average, some people are born prodigies and some people are born autistic.
It just is. It's not something you can ... alter, but you can ALWAYS work (even if just baby-steps) to make life happier and better for you.
A diagnosis isn't a social-death-sentence. However, it does mean that maybe you have to focus on spending your time cultivating friends that are more "enlightened" when it comes to people that are in one way or another different from them.
THEY EXIST- believe me, I've managed to meet such people

Also, I really hate that these other non-autistic people usually smash into people's heads the idea that they "can't" simply because- oh autistic. It's good to know your limitations =, but those limitations aren't there to say you can never do XYZ things they are there to be worked with tested and pushed.
However, it takes time, but know that any and everyone is capable of improvement.

Actually, this is a good starting point. It is really good that you see this. From this point it is easier to improve yourself. You are 21, don't worry, there will be plenty of challenges ahead. As long as you don't go running to Mommy every time you have a problem, you can improve.

Plenty of people in countries with high unemployment have a similar experience to yours. Because there are no jobs, they live like teenagers off the Bank of Mum and Dad. Reality hits them too. It is important to recognize this and get some life skills. It is good that you actually have a job. A habit of working is important.

Look at the good things you have. You are in the US, right? You are not among the poor. If you have a decent education that is a starting point. If you have fake good grades because people gave you an easy time it is time to hit the MOOCS. Do some physical exercises every day. Find some group that does what you are interested in and meet up, or volunteer.

I'm not saying it's easy. I've seen some of your earlier posts, and I assume you'll have some run-ins with women who won't take crap from you. It is possible to get better at social stuff, though, through trying and failing and getting a little bit better at it every time.

One crucial idea to keep in mind is that people don't owe you anything. Outside your family, everything is a transaction of sorts. I keep running into a lot of young people who fail to understand that they can't expect to get something for nothing. Don't be one of them.

I sometimes view my autism as a curse. It gives me the usual communication/social problems, I'm out in the cold with what's left of my family. I'm nearly 60 now but can still remember the horrible, quite frightening loneliness of my late teens/twenties. I turned to drink (and drugs to a lesser extent) in an effort to fit in, failed and became an alcoholic. I was really pissed off. How unfair was my life? Joining a well-known alcoholics group helped enormously. They got the self-pity out of me and when I said "Why me?" they just said "Why not you?" I was stuck for an answer. They saved my life. Thanks Bill, thanks Bob.
Back to loneliness though, I've never had more than one or two friends, usually none at all but I never really wanted more than one or two. I think it is best to find people who have the same interests as us. For all that we are a bit odd, weird or whatever I think most people, the intelligent ones anyway, will see past that if we share their passions and have genuine knowledge, skill etc. It is vital not to adopt other peoples' interests in an attempt to fit in, It just doesn't work.
I was diagnosed at the age of 58, so I never knew why I was different and I had to struggle on as best I could. I got no special help at school and was a mediocre student who went on to a succession of dead-end low paid jobs. Your education may help you to more, I hope so. Having a crap job can be a source of stress rather than satisfaction.
Nowadays I have to revise my view of my autism. Without it I'd be a stranger to myself. I probably would't have my own particular interests. I have one friend for sure now and another who passes in and out of my life according to her 'orbit'.
When I watch groups of NT's socialising, esp men and listen to the shallow and totally boring nonsense that passes as conversation - no real detail or passion - it's almost like it's not allowed - I feel a certain relief that I'm not one of them.
Look to your strengths and your blessings. It could be worse.

OP isn't around anymore.

Damn! May last year, eh?

And we were so adult

I don't let others speak for me and tell me what my limitations are. I tell others what I can and can't do. I still need support and social assistance, though the challenges I face aren't only from Asperger's. I know what the OP means that autism spectrum comes with a different connotation than the label Asperger's. The average person who hear's autism conjures an image of Rainman, even from doctor's/health care professionals who of all people should know better.

Having ASD is not the end of the world. Some people with ASD believe that having ASD will also cause problems in their lives, but some believe the opposite.