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Ashariel
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13 Feb 2016, 6:13 pm

JohnPowell wrote:
Do you have skype or something? I used to be like that, but practice helps. We could say you have to come up with an answer in a certain amount of time. Practicing being under pressure will help. I still get anxious when I don't know the person, but only a bit. My problem is in a group, though i've gradually improved.


I would be afraid to try skype. I only tried 'Instant Messages' and online chat a few times, when I first got on the internet, but quickly realized it wasn't my thing!

Yes I agree practice helps. Also I do better with business interactions, focusing on accomplishing a specific task, rather than just randomly 'shooting the breeze' and trying to make small talk.



JohnPowell
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13 Feb 2016, 7:08 pm

Ashariel wrote:
JohnPowell wrote:
Do you have skype or something? I used to be like that, but practice helps. We could say you have to come up with an answer in a certain amount of time. Practicing being under pressure will help. I still get anxious when I don't know the person, but only a bit. My problem is in a group, though i've gradually improved.


I would be afraid to try skype. I only tried 'Instant Messages' and online chat a few times, when I first got on the internet, but quickly realized it wasn't my thing!

Yes I agree practice helps. Also I do better with business interactions, focusing on accomplishing a specific task, rather than just randomly 'shooting the breeze' and trying to make small talk.


Haha, I didn't mean video chat, as that is scary to me more than anything. You can just do Instant Messenger on skype like msn. Lol, small talk sucks.

Yep, that's why I thought if you have a time limit to reply, you will be forcing yourself to break that problem. PM me if you're interested. I don't judge people. With business, you have something to focus on, rather than panicking about what you should or shouldn't say. You just ought to remember that no one will judge you as harshly as you judge yourself.


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zkydz
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13 Feb 2016, 8:19 pm

JohnPowell wrote:
Ashariel wrote:
JohnPowell wrote:
Do you have skype or something? I used to be like that, but practice helps. We could say you have to come up with an answer in a certain amount of time. Practicing being under pressure will help. I still get anxious when I don't know the person, but only a bit. My problem is in a group, though i've gradually improved.


I would be afraid to try skype. I only tried 'Instant Messages' and online chat a few times, when I first got on the internet, but quickly realized it wasn't my thing!

Yes I agree practice helps. Also I do better with business interactions, focusing on accomplishing a specific task, rather than just randomly 'shooting the breeze' and trying to make small talk.


Haha, I didn't mean video chat, as that is scary to me more than anything. You can just do Instant Messenger on skype like msn. Lol, small talk sucks.

Yep, that's why I thought if you have a time limit to reply, you will be forcing yourself to break that problem. PM me if you're interested. I don't judge people. With business, you have something to focus on, rather than panicking about what you should or shouldn't say. You just ought to remember that no one will judge you as harshly as you judge yourself.
Skype with someone you trust.


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JohnPowell
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13 Feb 2016, 8:31 pm

zkydz wrote:
JohnPowell wrote:
Ashariel wrote:
JohnPowell wrote:
Do you have skype or something? I used to be like that, but practice helps. We could say you have to come up with an answer in a certain amount of time. Practicing being under pressure will help. I still get anxious when I don't know the person, but only a bit. My problem is in a group, though i've gradually improved.


I would be afraid to try skype. I only tried 'Instant Messages' and online chat a few times, when I first got on the internet, but quickly realized it wasn't my thing!

Yes I agree practice helps. Also I do better with business interactions, focusing on accomplishing a specific task, rather than just randomly 'shooting the breeze' and trying to make small talk.


Haha, I didn't mean video chat, as that is scary to me more than anything. You can just do Instant Messenger on skype like msn. Lol, small talk sucks.

Yep, that's why I thought if you have a time limit to reply, you will be forcing yourself to break that problem. PM me if you're interested. I don't judge people. With business, you have something to focus on, rather than panicking about what you should or shouldn't say. You just ought to remember that no one will judge you as harshly as you judge yourself.
Skype with someone you trust.


Even then it would feel awkward. Far more awkward than in person.


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zkydz
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13 Feb 2016, 8:41 pm

JohnPowell wrote:
zkydz wrote:
JohnPowell wrote:
Ashariel wrote:
JohnPowell wrote:
Do you have skype or something? I used to be like that, but practice helps. We could say you have to come up with an answer in a certain amount of time. Practicing being under pressure will help. I still get anxious when I don't know the person, but only a bit. My problem is in a group, though i've gradually improved.


I would be afraid to try skype. I only tried 'Instant Messages' and online chat a few times, when I first got on the internet, but quickly realized it wasn't my thing!

Yes I agree practice helps. Also I do better with business interactions, focusing on accomplishing a specific task, rather than just randomly 'shooting the breeze' and trying to make small talk.


Haha, I didn't mean video chat, as that is scary to me more than anything. You can just do Instant Messenger on skype like msn. Lol, small talk sucks.

Yep, that's why I thought if you have a time limit to reply, you will be forcing yourself to break that problem. PM me if you're interested. I don't judge people. With business, you have something to focus on, rather than panicking about what you should or shouldn't say. You just ought to remember that no one will judge you as harshly as you judge yourself.
Skype with someone you trust.


Even then it would feel awkward. Far more awkward than in person.
Maybe, maybe not. It may create enough of an in person disconnect that it may be freeing. Only you can decide. All I can say is that Skype or any video chat doesn't require as much of the social protocols of face to face.


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RAADS-R -- 213.3
FQ -- 18.7
EQ -- 13
Aspie Quiz -- 186 out of 200
AQ: 42
AQ-10: 8.8


Ashariel
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13 Feb 2016, 9:08 pm

Hehe I just realized when I asked "Can you guys do instant messages" it might have come across as "Can you please chat with me"... When I really meant: literally, CAN you do it? Because I can't (and in fact hate it!)

But thank you for the kind offer... I think WP is enough of a social challenge for me!



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13 Feb 2016, 9:21 pm

zkydz wrote:
JohnPowell wrote:
zkydz wrote:
JohnPowell wrote:
Ashariel wrote:
JohnPowell wrote:
Do you have skype or something? I used to be like that, but practice helps. We could say you have to come up with an answer in a certain amount of time. Practicing being under pressure will help. I still get anxious when I don't know the person, but only a bit. My problem is in a group, though i've gradually improved.


I would be afraid to try skype. I only tried 'Instant Messages' and online chat a few times, when I first got on the internet, but quickly realized it wasn't my thing!

Yes I agree practice helps. Also I do better with business interactions, focusing on accomplishing a specific task, rather than just randomly 'shooting the breeze' and trying to make small talk.


Haha, I didn't mean video chat, as that is scary to me more than anything. You can just do Instant Messenger on skype like msn. Lol, small talk sucks.

Yep, that's why I thought if you have a time limit to reply, you will be forcing yourself to break that problem. PM me if you're interested. I don't judge people. With business, you have something to focus on, rather than panicking about what you should or shouldn't say. You just ought to remember that no one will judge you as harshly as you judge yourself.
Skype with someone you trust.


Even then it would feel awkward. Far more awkward than in person.
Maybe, maybe not. It may create enough of an in person disconnect that it may be freeing. Only you can decide. All I can say is that Skype or any video chat doesn't require as much of the social protocols of face to face.


We're all different. I feel like I have that sense that at least people cannot run away in person lol, if they think i've said the wrong thing or misunderstood. Where as online, they can block me in an instant.


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JohnPowell
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13 Feb 2016, 9:25 pm

Ashariel wrote:
Hehe I just realized when I asked "Can you guys do instant messages" it might have come across as "Can you please chat with me"... When I really meant: literally, CAN you do it? Because I can't (and in fact hate it!)

But thank you for the kind offer... I think WP is enough of a social challenge for me!


Lol, no I knew what you meant. I just probably shouldn't have used Skype as an example, because it sounds like I was offering to video chat.

If you do ever want to practice with Instant messaging, just let me know.


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zkydz
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13 Feb 2016, 10:20 pm

JohnPowell wrote:
zkydz wrote:
JohnPowell wrote:
zkydz wrote:
JohnPowell wrote:
Ashariel wrote:
JohnPowell wrote:
Do you have skype or something? I used to be like that, but practice helps. We could say you have to come up with an answer in a certain amount of time. Practicing being under pressure will help. I still get anxious when I don't know the person, but only a bit. My problem is in a group, though i've gradually improved.


I would be afraid to try skype. I only tried 'Instant Messages' and online chat a few times, when I first got on the internet, but quickly realized it wasn't my thing!

Yes I agree practice helps. Also I do better with business interactions, focusing on accomplishing a specific task, rather than just randomly 'shooting the breeze' and trying to make small talk.


Haha, I didn't mean video chat, as that is scary to me more than anything. You can just do Instant Messenger on skype like msn. Lol, small talk sucks.

Yep, that's why I thought if you have a time limit to reply, you will be forcing yourself to break that problem. PM me if you're interested. I don't judge people. With business, you have something to focus on, rather than panicking about what you should or shouldn't say. You just ought to remember that no one will judge you as harshly as you judge yourself.
Skype with someone you trust.


Even then it would feel awkward. Far more awkward than in person.
Maybe, maybe not. It may create enough of an in person disconnect that it may be freeing. Only you can decide. All I can say is that Skype or any video chat doesn't require as much of the social protocols of face to face.


We're all different. I feel like I have that sense that at least people cannot run away in person lol, if they think i've said the wrong thing or misunderstood. Where as online, they can block me in an instant.
Gotcha...I was coming at it from a different direction. I was thinking about the face contact/eye contact thing. I understand now. But, that's why I said someone you could trust. But, I believe that you are the best to decide.


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RAADS-R -- 213.3
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Aspie Quiz -- 186 out of 200
AQ: 42
AQ-10: 8.8


JohnPowell
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13 Feb 2016, 10:27 pm

zkydz-

I can still avoid eye contact in person, as much as possible 8) I just feel like i'm being constantly watched on video etc lol.


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zkydz
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13 Feb 2016, 10:33 pm

JohnPowell wrote:
zkydz-

I can still avoid eye contact in person, as much as possible 8) I just feel like i'm being constantly watched on video etc lol.
huh...completely different perspective. On video, I am more comfortable than in person. It just seems detached enough that it moves me a bit further away from 'real contact'. I can also hide my fidgeting instead of burying it or my hands in the pocket. I can bounce my knees. Best of all, I can do the anchorman thing. Dressed good from the chest up and flip flops and shorts down below. Worked at a TV station in the 80's. They do that....come in and only dress from the waist up sometimes. Still awkward, but not as much. Just out of curiosity...ever try something like Skype without the video on? I'm just curious....not pushing.


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RAADS-R -- 213.3
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Aspie Quiz -- 186 out of 200
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DailyPoutine1
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13 Feb 2016, 10:35 pm

Yeah I'm always like that especially when girls try to initiate conversation.


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zkydz
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13 Feb 2016, 10:41 pm

DailyPoutine1 wrote:
Yeah I'm always like that especially when girls try to initiate conversation.
I was the same way at your age. Especially if I was attracted to her. And, much to my dismay no better now. It's like my emotional clock stopped at about 10 or twelve. And it shows whenever I've had relationships. But, I did find someone who likes her pigtails pulled and is not into sophistication, but can be a bit of a lady in public while I do try to be a gentleman. She is more successful than I though, I fear.


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Aspie Quiz -- 186 out of 200
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JohnPowell
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13 Feb 2016, 10:47 pm

Yeah, i'm fine with skype IM.


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zkydz
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13 Feb 2016, 10:52 pm

JohnPowell wrote:
Yeah, i'm fine with skype IM.
what about with audio on and video off? That may not be better if the conversational delays are there and you're not sure if the other person is listening though.....I dunno...Sorry...I'm going all wonky about this and it's not my place......Normally this would not be a post....one of those I start and then don't post. But, this seems almost conversational and I feel it would leave you hanging if I did not respond or what...I dunno.....In a personal meeting, this would be where I start to lose it and can't really respond, but feel I should based on social protocol. Make sense?


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RAADS-R -- 213.3
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Aspie Quiz -- 186 out of 200
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13 Feb 2016, 10:56 pm

JohnPowell wrote:
Yeah, i'm fine with skype IM.
I don't have friends to skype with.


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