Criticism-How Do You React?

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I've never really taken criticism too well, but I'm starting to learn to take things less personally.

Very quietly, no comment. Then I go home and melt - sometimes for days.

Badly.

1. I assume the criticism is true (like many, have spent a life being supposedly 'in the wrong')
2. I become EXTREMELY (and often irrationally) hurt by it - embarrassed, want to disappear, never come back
3. It lingers in my mind like FOREVER
4. I assume everyone else must feel the same about me
5. I sometimes can no longer relate normally to the criticising person ever again

And sometimes, things that aren't criticisms can sometimes feel like they ARE. I guess that's called being over-sensitive!

usually, im positive to nondescriptly neutral.

factual criticism, i take just as statements on facts. they are either true or not, or either i agree or dont. ill usually respond with just that information, on a factual basis.
no reason t o be affected personally... its about the facts, not about me. (and i usually have some reasons to having my opinion, so i wont often caught flat-footed)

personal criticism out of a situation where factual criticism would be appropriate (discussing some matters and someone starts going personal) - i find that amusing. its such a senseless move... usually, i point out that the person left tha level of factual discussion, and ask why they did it. this usually gets a few chuckles and punishes the stupid move enough without being openly hostile (i dont want to get down on that level...) - if such criticism obviously was caused by misunderstanding and not hostility or helplessness, i point it out anyway and also explain where the misunderstanding took place. facual treatment, again...
no way such a situation could affect me. its a lapsus of the other one, not mine.

personal criticism as such: hehe, funny, usually. doesnt affect me much, as i am who i am.

Heh, I have trouble discerning between constructive and destructive criticism.

I'll usually take it personally, usually get into a long argument about things, and then;
a) If i realise that they may have been correct in there assessment I'll slowly back down
b) Realise there is no point arguing with said person as they are more stubborn than I.
c) If I am still right I'll usually get them to a point of submission, where they accept I was right.
Sadly, I don't realise I am doing this, and so can get into nasty 'discussions' with people other what are trivial things.

Its definitely alot harder to take criticism from people close to you or you trust. Its even worse when you can't fight back with argument, as it would harm you in some way, yet you know there criticsm is completely wrong due to there lack of knowledge.

That sounds like me too. And like others have said, it can linger in my head for days, and really freaks me out.

As a child and teenager I was told I couldn't take criticism. Now I try to just hold my feelings in check, just keep my mouth shut until I can later process it as best I can, and see if maybe there's something to it. But my initial reaction is really emotional, and yeah, I want to verbally lash out if I don't keep a tight hold on myself. I think I take it really personally as an attack on myself, that I'm not good.

WOW, I did the SAME thing! Most ridiculed the idea that I would bring it up a day or week later! Interesting, since my last boss would twist things, exagerate, and bring it up YEARS later! I take criticism ok if it is JUST!

Steve

im usually indifferent about criticism, i couldnt really care all that much about it. unless its something i like, for instance music.

It depends. I'm much less defensive then I used to be. Still, if I think the criticism if based on nonsense then my reaction will be different if I think there might be some reasonable point to be made.

I don't take criticism well. I get defensive and assume that the person giving the criticism was just trying to hurt me.

I melt down until the person realizes their mistake.

Ditto, Its almost as if i view everyone as an evil version of Simon Cowell. I'm trying to get over it though

Everybody needs to filter criticism. Which means everybody tries to think of a reason why the person criticising might not be right.

I'm just exceptionally good at that

I take criticism from my shrink much more easily since she is usually always right, and because most criticism from people (eg at work) is useless information, just intended to make the other person feel like they're doing their job properly, or that they know something you don't. Like don't do this, don't do that, it's too small, too specific, only refers to minor symptoms of underlying problems and nobody could ever remember it all anyway.

It's a sad fact that most middle managers are considered inept not only by myself but also most NT's. Their advice (once you've settled in and learned the basics) is usually of less value than your colleagues, however my colleagues usually don't care to give me advice. This is bacause even then 80% of what your colleagues tell you is still of little or no value (see above) and I sometimes tell them that. Leaving me only with assistance from the manager 95% of which advice is given (if he is a man) in order to appear as if he is actually doing his job (which it is unlikely he actually is [since he knows as a manager he can just sack anybody who actually requires management and put his feet up which is a much more preferable option for him]) . Or if she is a Woman the criticism may be OTT in order to subordinate me and make me feel stupid. This in turn is a means for her to overcome her secret fear that because I am a man I do not take her seriously in a position of authority over me.

Which I would... Except for this reaction.

The mans reaction to invest the minimum effort is perfectly logical and while it's not good and doesn't help me. At least I can see how it benefits him and it rarely backfires on him. As opposed to the womans reaction which has no benefit for her and could potentially much more easily backfire on her.

This is the biggest problem I face at work!