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Aspie solidarity is a big fat myth

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SaveFerris
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26 Mar 2018, 7:30 pm

Daniel89 wrote:
SaveFerris wrote:

twist it anyway you want babe , but you made your point , no one took the bait so you decided to turn this thread into your personal agenda , where has anyone here said that woman have it easier , I must be blind coz I don't see it.


I believe in general women with Autism do have it easier than men with Autism, just as I believe a person with one leg has it easier than someone with none. Easier but not easy.



That shut me up then , hope you don't get s**t Dan with that sort of attitude


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karathraceandherspecialdestiny
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26 Mar 2018, 7:31 pm

SaveFerris wrote:
karathraceandherspecialdestiny wrote:
SaveFerris wrote:
karathraceandherspecialdestiny wrote:

Can we please stop it with the "girls have it so much easier than guys" BS, PLEASE???


What is your problem? Nothing has been said about woman since you stated this thread was sexist , you are clearly seeing things that do not exist.

You are clearly looking for a fight.


Yup, it's just me. I know for a fact there are no other women on this forum tired of guys talking about how much easier autistic women have it than autistic men. No other women think that, just me, because I'm looking for a fight. :roll:


twist it anyway you want , but you made your point , no one took the bait so you decided to turn this thread into your personal agenda , where has anyone here said that woman have it easier , I must be blind coz I don't see it.



The OP of this thread is the one who brought women into it: "There are two kinds of aspies. The successful ones, largely female and able to hide their condition and the unsucessful ones who have no choice but to be recognised as what we are." There are so many faulty assumptions about autism in women in this statement, and it contributes to that theme of "autistic men vs autistic women: who has it worse" that goes on here that we don't need to feed. We're supposed to be supporting each other, not comparing suffering to figure out who deserves more sympathy.



SaveFerris
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26 Mar 2018, 7:35 pm

karathraceandherspecialdestiny wrote:
SaveFerris wrote:
karathraceandherspecialdestiny wrote:
SaveFerris wrote:
karathraceandherspecialdestiny wrote:

Can we please stop it with the "girls have it so much easier than guys" BS, PLEASE???


What is your problem? Nothing has been said about woman since you stated this thread was sexist , you are clearly seeing things that do not exist.

You are clearly looking for a fight.


Yup, it's just me. I know for a fact there are no other women on this forum tired of guys talking about how much easier autistic women have it than autistic men. No other women think that, just me, because I'm looking for a fight. :roll:


twist it anyway you want, but you made your point , no one took the bait so you decided to turn this thread into your personal agenda , where has anyone here said that woman have it easier , I must be blind coz I don't see it.



The OP of this thread is the one who brought women into it: "There are two kinds of aspies. The successful ones, largely female and able to hide their condition and the unsucessful ones who have no choice but to be recognised as what we are." There are so many faulty assumptions about autism in women in this statement, and it contributes to that theme of "autistic men vs autistic women: who has it worse" that goes on here that we don't need to feed. We're supposed to be supporting each other, not comparing suffering to figure out who deserves more sympathy.


I think I may of been wrong , sorry. There are people here who think women have it easier. I'll leave it to you to tear them a new one


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karathraceandherspecialdestiny
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26 Mar 2018, 7:41 pm

SaveFerris wrote:
karathraceandherspecialdestiny wrote:
SaveFerris wrote:
karathraceandherspecialdestiny wrote:
SaveFerris wrote:
karathraceandherspecialdestiny wrote:

Can we please stop it with the "girls have it so much easier than guys" BS, PLEASE???


What is your problem? Nothing has been said about woman since you stated this thread was sexist , you are clearly seeing things that do not exist.

You are clearly looking for a fight.


Yup, it's just me. I know for a fact there are no other women on this forum tired of guys talking about how much easier autistic women have it than autistic men. No other women think that, just me, because I'm looking for a fight. :roll:


twist it anyway you want, but you made your point , no one took the bait so you decided to turn this thread into your personal agenda , where has anyone here said that woman have it easier , I must be blind coz I don't see it.



The OP of this thread is the one who brought women into it: "There are two kinds of aspies. The successful ones, largely female and able to hide their condition and the unsucessful ones who have no choice but to be recognised as what we are." There are so many faulty assumptions about autism in women in this statement, and it contributes to that theme of "autistic men vs autistic women: who has it worse" that goes on here that we don't need to feed. We're supposed to be supporting each other, not comparing suffering to figure out who deserves more sympathy.


I think I may of been wrong , sorry. There are people here who think women have it easier. I'll leave it to you to tear them a new one


I'm not interested in arguing with that person, he won't listen to me because he's already made up his mind. He knows better than I do what my life as an autistic woman has been like, in his mind. There is no point arguing with that. He will just hear an emotional irrational woman going "blah blah blah" at him, no matter what I say or how I say it.



Daniel89
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26 Mar 2018, 7:42 pm

SaveFerris wrote:


That shut me up then , hope you don't get s**t Dan with that sort of attitude


Its not an attitude. An attitude would be resentment towards women for this. I have no ill will towards women and I accept autistic women suffer too. Society has certain expectations of for men and women this has benefits and down sides for both genders. Men are meant to be more assertive and women more passive. I think having a reserved personality is easier for women. When I was younger there were attractive girls who fancied me I knew they did and I liked them too however I had two problems, I didn't have the social skills to get a job and since males are expected to pay for dates I couldn't afford to date, I also didn't have the social skills or know how to ask her a girl out. Had I been female then I would have been approached, I would have not been expected to pay for dates initially.



Daniel89
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26 Mar 2018, 7:45 pm

karathraceandherspecialdestiny wrote:

I'm not interested in arguing with that person, he won't listen to me because he's already made up his mind. He knows better than I do what my life as an autistic woman has been like, in his mind. There is no point arguing with that. He will just hear an emotional irrational woman going "blah blah blah" at him, no matter what I say or how I say it.


I'm not sure if you are talking about me. But its my belief women in general will have an easier time with autism that men, but not always and I have no idea about your life specifically.



SaveFerris
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26 Mar 2018, 7:51 pm

Daniel89 wrote:
SaveFerris wrote:


That shut me up then , hope you don't get s**t Dan with that sort of attitude


Its not an attitude. An attitude would be resentment towards women for this. I have no ill will towards women and I accept autistic women suffer too. Society has certain expectations of for men and women this has benefits and down sides for both genders. Men are meant to be more assertive and women more passive. I think having a reserved personality is easier for women. When I was younger there were attractive girls who fancied me I knew they did and I liked them too however I had two problems, I didn't have the social skills to get a job and since males are expected to pay for dates I couldn't afford to date, I also didn't have the social skills or know how to ask her a girl out. Had I been female then I would have been approached, I would have not been expected to pay for dates initially.


attitude =a settled way of thinking or feeling about something.

You think woman have it easier thus an attitude.

man to man Dan , This type of attitude is going to do you no favours especially with women.


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plokijuh
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26 Mar 2018, 7:52 pm

I think you're right about pressures on men to an extent, but you can't see the associated pressures from the other side. Women are expected to be nurturing and empathetic, social and putting others at ease. If we're not, women literally reject us, and men don't know what to do with us. I was not asked out on a single date until I was 23. I'm hopeless at dating so I don't really care (plus I married him so that worked out well), but I am not sure your assessment is entirely accurate.

I'm just trying to sketch the other side, not trying to undermine what you've been through.


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karathraceandherspecialdestiny
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26 Mar 2018, 7:52 pm

Daniel89 wrote:
karathraceandherspecialdestiny wrote:

I'm not interested in arguing with that person, he won't listen to me because he's already made up his mind. He knows better than I do what my life as an autistic woman has been like, in his mind. There is no point arguing with that. He will just hear an emotional irrational woman going "blah blah blah" at him, no matter what I say or how I say it.


I'm not sure if you are talking about me. But its my belief women in general will have an easier time with autism that men, but not always and I have no idea about your life specifically.


I don't have it in me to argue with guys like you anymore. Think whatever you want about autistic women, I don't care.



Daniel89
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26 Mar 2018, 7:57 pm

SaveFerris wrote:

attitude =a settled way of thinking or feeling about something.

You think woman have it easier thus an attitude.

man to man Dan , This type of attitude is going to do you no favours especially with women.


I think middle class people have it easier than working class people is that an attitude?
I think attractive people have it easier than unattractive people is that an attitude?

My thinking isn't settled It could be change these are just my opinions from my experiences.



SaveFerris
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26 Mar 2018, 8:00 pm

Daniel89 wrote:
SaveFerris wrote:

attitude =a settled way of thinking or feeling about something.

You think woman have it easier thus an attitude.

man to man Dan , This type of attitude is going to do you no favours especially with women.


I think middle class people have it easier than working class people is that an attitude?
I think attractive people have it easier than unattractive people is that an attitude?



Yes
Yes


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Daniel89
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26 Mar 2018, 8:02 pm

plokijuh wrote:
I think you're right about pressures on men to an extent, but you can't see the associated pressures from the other side. Women are expected to be nurturing and empathetic, social and putting others at ease. If we're not, women literally reject us, and men don't know what to do with us. I was not asked out on a single date until I was 23. I'm hopeless at dating so I don't really care (plus I married him so that worked out well), but I am not sure your assessment is entirely accurate.

I'm just trying to sketch the other side, not trying to undermine what you've been through.


Honestly I think I had a female friend in college who may have been on the spectrum and I can acknowledge she had it harder than me in some ways. I do accept women are meant to be more social and didn't consider that aspect of it.



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27 Mar 2018, 7:31 am

What female autistics do you know so called "fuctioning normally" now?



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27 Mar 2018, 8:18 am

Daniel89 wrote:
fifasy wrote:

I would say you are high functioning. People here who ignore me because they think they're above me speak to you. I am sure I am burning all my bridges here at this point but whatever, I have nothing to lose. I have known for months people here wanted me gone anyway. I was cramping people's style.


I don't think you are burning bridges just having a low point, lots of us go through them.

Recently I heard something good: "May the bridges I burn light the way".

Sometimes it is better to ignore, destroy or leave what's bad for you - that includes people who make you feel lesser and things, environments and places that have bad influence on you. Doing so gives you the confidence and strength to move forward.



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27 Mar 2018, 10:04 am

I read a quote once, can't recall where:" "Mild autism" doesn't mean I experience my autism mildly. It means that YOU experience my autism mildly."


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SaveFerris
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27 Mar 2018, 10:18 am

Wolfram87 wrote:
I read a quote once, can't recall where:" "Mild autism" doesn't mean I experience my autism mildly. It means that YOU experience my autism mildly."


I read that here from a poster named Willard


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