Feeling like a child trapped in an adult’s body

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I will be 54 in three weeks and I am nothing close to achieving what I should have accomplished at this age. I have come a long way from the person I was in 2011-2012, but I don't know if I will ever accomplish full independence. I am working on it, but I'm still at least 20 years behind in development and maturity and that figure takes into account my education, the only area where I am ahead. As far as applying my skills at a high level, I have fallen way short.

I would like to get married one day, but a future of being that old lady with the cats (at that, only outdoor ones now) is imminent. I'll be the cat loving, tennis playing Federer/Nadal/Istomin fan.