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Why do so many NTs dislike us so much?

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cruxdust
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22 Nov 2007, 12:40 pm

InSpades wrote:
shopaholic wrote:
Because we don't keep the "rules" in relation to social interaction, so they think we are contemptuous, rude & unfriendly.


Exactly. They don't know we are ret*ds. They think we are jerks. Everyone else follows these rules and then we come along and it looks like we are giving everyone the finger regarding them.


Excuse me, but I find that term very, very offensive. You may think of yourself as a 'ret*d', but if that's the case, please don't group us all in with you. To be ret*d, in my eyes, is to lack IQ. I'd be fine if you'd said 'socially awkward' or even 'socially ret*d', but to be called a ret*d in general just sickens me.

And by the way...

1. I see a lot of NT hate around here- so to ask why NTs hate us so much is sort of hypocrisy, don't you think?
2. NTs are not stupid, and to say that they do not like to think is very 'jerk'-ish if you ask me.
3. The majority of NTs are not malicious or hateful, but seem to recieve a lot of hate from Aspies nonetheless.
4. Aspies can be bullies, too.
5. NTs may not be stupid, but since Aspies as a whole look like normal people, they're not going to know you're autistic, either. They're not mind readers, any more than we are. To ask them to make allowances for someone they just see as rude and self-righteous, whilst refusing to tell them about your condition, is extremely unfair. After all, Aspies OBVIOUSLY refuse to accept NT-ism.
6. Many NTs would accept our condition if only they knew about it.



TitanDak
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22 Nov 2007, 12:42 pm

Becasue they are jelous that I am not afriad to admit I like certian things that might cause people to make fun of me or that are not popular with most people. Also maybe because I can be super rude and cold to some people to make them go away or if someone I have never seen before starts talking I just shut down.



Mw99
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22 Nov 2007, 12:55 pm

cruxdust wrote:
InSpades wrote:
shopaholic wrote:
Because we don't keep the "rules" in relation to social interaction, so they think we are contemptuous, rude & unfriendly.


Exactly. They don't know we are ret*ds. They think we are jerks. Everyone else follows these rules and then we come along and it looks like we are giving everyone the finger regarding them.


Excuse me, but I find that term very, very offensive. You may think of yourself as a 'ret*d', but if that's the case, please don't group us all in with you. To be ret*d, in my eyes, is to lack IQ. I'd be fine if you'd said 'socially awkward' or even 'socially ret*d', but to be called a ret*d in general just sickens me.i


A lot of us are socially ret*d.



cruxdust
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22 Nov 2007, 12:57 pm

Mw99 wrote:
cruxdust wrote:
InSpades wrote:
shopaholic wrote:
Because we don't keep the "rules" in relation to social interaction, so they think we are contemptuous, rude & unfriendly.


Exactly. They don't know we are ret*ds. They think we are jerks. Everyone else follows these rules and then we come along and it looks like we are giving everyone the finger regarding them.


Excuse me, but I find that term very, very offensive. You may think of yourself as a 'ret*d', but if that's the case, please don't group us all in with you. To be ret*d, in my eyes, is to lack IQ. I'd be fine if you'd said 'socially awkward' or even 'socially ret*d', but to be called a ret*d in general just sickens me.i


A lot of us are socially ret*d.


That's why I said I would have been fine if Spades had said that. I just dislike being called a ret*d, and for those who don't, I suppose I feel a little sorry for them, because they've obviously listened to those people who've told them that they'll never live a normal life.



InSpades
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22 Nov 2007, 1:05 pm

cruxdust wrote:
That's why I said I would have been fine if Spades had said that. I just dislike being called a ret*d, and for those who don't, I suppose I feel a little sorry for them, because they've obviously listened to those people who've told them that they'll never live a normal life.


ret*d and socially ret*d are basically the same thing. Who cares what brain power we have? For 9 out of 10 our higher brain power is useless in this world. For most of us, its whole lot of nothing . Social skills are the most important thing.



Last edited by InSpades on 22 Nov 2007, 1:42 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Mw99
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22 Nov 2007, 1:29 pm

InSpades wrote:
cruxdust wrote:
That's why I said I would have been fine if Spades had said that. I just dislike being called a ret*d, and for those who don't, I suppose I feel a little sorry for them, because they've obviously listened to those people who've told them that they'll never live a normal life.


ret*d and socially ret*d are basically the same thing. Who cares what brain power we have? For 9 out of 10 our us our higher brain power is useless in this world. For most of us, its whole lot of nothing . Social skills are the most important thing.


It depends on your goals and values in life. Do you want money, power, fame? Then social skills might very well be the most important thing. Do you want inner happiness, wisdom? Then in that case social skills are irrelevant or merely a plus. I know it might sound hard to believe, but not everyone shares you goals and values in life.



InSpades
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22 Nov 2007, 1:36 pm

Mw99 wrote:

It depends on your goals and values in life. Do you want money, power, fame? Then social skills might very well be the most important thing. Do you want inner happiness, wisdom? Then in that case social skills are irrelevant or merely a plus. I know it might sound hard to believe, but not everyone shares you goals and values in life.


I am making the assumption people want friends, a relationship with the opposite sex, and a career. Is that a bad assumption?

I imagine you wanted those things out of life but you changed your definition of happiness.



Last edited by InSpades on 22 Nov 2007, 1:41 pm, edited 2 times in total.

InSpades
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22 Nov 2007, 1:37 pm

(double post)



Unknown_Quantity
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22 Nov 2007, 1:40 pm

Those things would be nice, but I only really need the relationship. Luckily that's the one I got. Woohoo!

Yeah, people all have very different goals and different ways to measure success.

Who says because you have AS that you can't have friends or a career? Or that you need to have the same level of NT social skills as everyone else in order to gain those things?


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emo000
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22 Nov 2007, 1:49 pm

Unknown_Quantity wrote:
Do you mean that you're fully Autistic and not classified with Asperger's? Or do you mean that you do have Asperger's but you just don't accept being called an Aspie?


I have aspergers syndrome, i don't know what you mean by 'fully autistic.'
I find the term Aspie demeaning. It's just a personal thing. I know some people think otherwise, that's fine too.



emo000
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22 Nov 2007, 1:50 pm

InSpades wrote:
Mw99 wrote:

It depends on your goals and values in life. Do you want money, power, fame? Then social skills might very well be the most important thing. Do you want inner happiness, wisdom? Then in that case social skills are irrelevant or merely a plus. I know it might sound hard to believe, but not everyone shares you goals and values in life.


I am making the assumption people want friends, a relationship with the opposite sex, and a career. Is that a bad assumption?



Basically yes.



emo000
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22 Nov 2007, 1:52 pm

InSpades wrote:
cruxdust wrote:
That's why I said I would have been fine if Spades had said that. I just dislike being called a ret*d, and for those who don't, I suppose I feel a little sorry for them, because they've obviously listened to those people who've told them that they'll never live a normal life.


ret*d and socially ret*d are basically the same thing. Who cares what brain power we have? For 9 out of 10 our higher brain power is useless in this world. For most of us, its whole lot of nothing . Social skills are the most important thing.


I agree i am social ret*d, there can be no denying this.
However, social skills are only the most important thing if you are a 'social climber.'
Not all of us are.



Mw99
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22 Nov 2007, 1:55 pm

InSpades wrote:
Mw99 wrote:

It depends on your goals and values in life. Do you want money, power, fame? Then social skills might very well be the most important thing. Do you want inner happiness, wisdom? Then in that case social skills are irrelevant or merely a plus. I know it might sound hard to believe, but not everyone shares you goals and values in life.


I am making the assumption people want friends, a relationship with the opposite sex, and a career. Is that a bad assumption?

I imagine you wanted those things out of life but you changed your definition of happiness.


Aspies used to be thought of as "autistic psychopaths," some people are asexual, and not everyone cares about having a "career" (for some, a steady source of income will do). It's possible though, that over the years, in light of the reality of my situation, I decided to look for happiness in places I hadn't searched before. But now that I can see what I can see, I'd never go back to the type of NT-ish mentality I used to have when I was 10.



cruxdust
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22 Nov 2007, 2:18 pm

InSpades wrote:
cruxdust wrote:
That's why I said I would have been fine if Spades had said that. I just dislike being called a ret*d, and for those who don't, I suppose I feel a little sorry for them, because they've obviously listened to those people who've told them that they'll never live a normal life.


ret*d and socially ret*d are basically the same thing. Who cares what brain power we have? For 9 out of 10 our higher brain power is useless in this world. For most of us, its whole lot of nothing . Social skills are the most important thing.


Perhaps for you, but not everyone shares your pessimistic and self-demeaning outlook. I know aspies who are married and have jobs (a whole lot of them, in fact, my Media Studies teacher one year was an aspie), and I have a girlfriend and a part-time job myself, and my social skills, though better than those of most people here it seems (mainly because a lot of people here share your outlook, I'll bet. Some Aspies (NOT most, as many seem to believe) GENUINELY can't help themselves, have poor impulse control, and a lack of social skills. The others, they come here and are told by people such as yourself that they can't POSSIBLY be an Aspie) are nowhere NEAR perfect.



emo000
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22 Nov 2007, 2:25 pm

cruxdust wrote:
InSpades wrote:
cruxdust wrote:
That's why I said I would have been fine if Spades had said that. I just dislike being called a ret*d, and for those who don't, I suppose I feel a little sorry for them, because they've obviously listened to those people who've told them that they'll never live a normal life.


ret*d and socially ret*d are basically the same thing. Who cares what brain power we have? For 9 out of 10 our higher brain power is useless in this world. For most of us, its whole lot of nothing . Social skills are the most important thing.


Perhaps for you, but not everyone shares your pessimistic and self-demeaning outlook.


Its not pessimistic or self-demeaning it is the how it is.
It is judgement that destroys us.



cruxdust
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22 Nov 2007, 2:27 pm

emo000 wrote:
cruxdust wrote:
InSpades wrote:
cruxdust wrote:
That's why I said I would have been fine if Spades had said that. I just dislike being called a ret*d, and for those who don't, I suppose I feel a little sorry for them, because they've obviously listened to those people who've told them that they'll never live a normal life.


ret*d and socially ret*d are basically the same thing. Who cares what brain power we have? For 9 out of 10 our higher brain power is useless in this world. For most of us, its whole lot of nothing . Social skills are the most important thing.


Perhaps for you, but not everyone shares your pessimistic and self-demeaning outlook.


Its not pessimistic or self-demeaning it is the how it is.
It is judgement that destroys us.


It may be, for some of you, but it doesn't change the fact that it IS pessimistic, and it IS self-demeaning, and that many of you could do with a nicer outlook on life.