How High-Functioning are you?

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The only reason I didn't pick not at all was that I do have a social life, on WP. This is the first and only thing I've had that could be called a social life. I don't work anymore and I have never had a relationship, probably never will.

I am married (to an NT) with 2 young children (also on the spectrum)
I have an excellent cushy job in government administration (but I'm mainly sequestered)
I drive (but don't have a commute - BTDT)
I can prepare small meals (but anything with too many steps like full-course dinners sends me rocketing to the moon)
I am completely self-sufficient (but with the background support of others)


BUT...


I live at home still, with my parents. And I would preface that statement by saying that it's only because of x y or z, but the fact of the matter is that I live at home and I don't have plans to move out currently. It is not because I can't handle living on my own, I just have lame decision-making skills. I've gotten to the point where I can't even make decisions anymore.

And I have EXTREME difficulty mustering motivation to do anything outside of my normal routine. I actually come to fear that which I have to do, for something as little as get online and cancel my gym membership. Or pay bills. In fact, I get quite squirrely if I have to run more than one errand. And if my routine is punctured my anxiety level shoots right up through the roof.

I would never consider eating in a restaurant by myself, or go to a bar by myself. I find that to be something outside of my limits. And I could never take a road trip by myself (several days, sleeping in hotels), or travel on business by myself. That too is outside of my limits. I could never take my car to a mechanic's shop by myself. I could never change a tire by myself. All of these things put together tell me that I will never be able to take care of myself, alone.

So, even though I am at the higher end of functioning, it is only because I have a safety net of silent support from a small group of individuals. I am still a hindrance to myself.

None of the options fit me.

No friends.

No relationships.

I had a job for awhile but i ended up quitting due to AS related problems.

I am having trouble with school and always have due to AS and a co-morbid.

I can seem weird or eccentric around other people, at least for a short time.

I live with my parents and I suspect that living on my own will be fairly difficult, but I'm sure I will be able to do it.

My self help skills are pretty good. I can cook,clean,adjust to changes quickly, and plan ahead.

I consider myself somewhat intelligent and competent, although I don't know if those have anything to do with overall functioning.

All told I would say that I am high to very high functioning in the self help,problem solving, and competence areas. I am low functioning to abysmal in the area of social interaction. I have trouble asking people questions or for help, and my inability to communicate in a concise manner cause me no end of trouble. In fact this post is much more verbose than i intended it to be, along with most of my other posts.

I didn't even realize that I was significantly different in my approach to social situations until fairly recently. I simply had NO CLUE that other people don't have to make a little mental box for everyone they meet, make a check-list of things they're likely to do, and then compare that against how they act every day to see if they're behaving like 'usual' or if there's something that needs to be noted... I've been so effective at coping that I come off as just extremely shy and occasionally awkward with strangers.

Where I have problems with people is when their body language doesn't match their face, eyes and what they say. I get really confused. I also wish there was a real life version of the delete key for things I say.

[quote="WhatWouldDaveDo"] I think a lot of my problems stem from being different and a bit weird and never knowing what's actually been wrong with me.
quote]

Yes.

Don't feel alone, though. I've been in and out of counselling for years. Every single one of them (counsellors) basically told me to 'come back when I have a real problem' (and that 's a direct quote from one putz). I didn't know what I was doing was different, only that I *knew* something was different. It's only through sheer luck and serendipity that I found some info on 'autism spectrum' and AS, and reading it has given me the tools to answer some of my own questions. It was both a relief and a lightbulb moment.

The very first thing you need to do is forgive yourself for not being perfect.

Then, get busy reading and finding coping strategies that work for you. CBT is probably perfect, but you can do that for yourself as well. You've probably been doing it already for years without knowing.

Hang in there.

i dont know.
generally i am okay with work. depends what
And i do have a few friends,,
I have had a few relashionships in the past, but i struggle with them. Lol.
duno which one fits me really.

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I am some what low functioning and I will tell you why.
1. I don't drive
2. I don't work
3. I don't go to "real" school, just art classes
4. I don't cook
5. I live with my parents and am 25 years young
6. All I am able to do is go on the computer and do research on medical and psychology stuff.
7. I have several friends but the only reason why I have friends is because of the group I go to and it is meant for people with mental illness. So, that means I am friends with a whole bunch of crazy people and I fit in perfectly! I'm that crazy!
8. I really don't have a boyfriend or any type of relationship. (I am a female even though most people with autism and Asperger's are male)

I work. One of my jobs is to do with my main obsession, and the other is in a quiet office with only my boss and no teamwork. Also, she doesn't get offended by my tendency to be honest. (Yes, it is as awesome as it sounds.) I still live with my parents, but I should be able to afford to move out soon.

I have friends. There are 5 people who I see on a semi-regular basis (i.e. more than once a year.) My friendships don't have the same level of emotional closeness and confiding that NT relationships seem to have, but they are more honest and straighforward, and I like them that way. The friends that I have are ones that are accepting of my my social problems, such as not knowing what the hell to say, tendency to turn every conversation back to my obsessions, and tendency to look everywhere BUT at whoever is speaking. (The other day, I was having lunch with my boss, and the only times I could drag my eyes away from the ceiling fans was when I was startled by someone talking or walking past me. I'm just glad she was feeling sick and not able to pay too much attention to me. ) (Not to mention the tendency to drift away to the nearest library... ). Besides all that, I just don't "get" people.

I've had relationships. They've all had problems caused by my emotional distance and tendency to take things literally and not know when people are teasing. At this stage, if I never have another relationship again, it'll be too soon.
I have a uni degree. The focus of my life at the moment is to get back to uni and never leave again.

I don't have a driver's licence. I'm sure I could drive, but I haven't been able to organise myself enough to go and do the written test. (I've been meaning to do it for the past 8 years.)

I have the organisational skills of a 6-year-old. Here are some examples of problems caused:
Last year: $220-ish dollars worth of overdue fees from my library.
3 years ago: $100 worth of overdue fees from my uni library.
Yesterday: Not paying attention (this was partly caused by sensory overload; I should have realised that something was wrong when I was eating lunch and couldn't quite figure out how to get my fork into my left hand and my knife into my right hand) caused me to lose a bag containing a shirt that I'd just paid $65 for.
All the effing time: Many small amounts of money for books, pens and so forth that I've forgotten.
I was going to post a picture of my room, but my camera has a flat battery. If I remember, I'll take one later and edit this post to include it.

I have the gross motor skills of a six-year-old. My fine motor skills can be brilliant, but they are unreliable.

I'd say I'm pretty high-functioning.

Average for work. Since HS I've always worked full time, but struggle with bosses, coworkers, and customers. Get distressed easily, and even though I do most tasks with above average skill, I tend to be a little unprofessional. I do exceptional work when I'm not expected to interact much, and do the best work when I'm left completely alone. The thing I hate the most though, is when a job becomes my routine I get stuck with it for years even if it's something I hate or something that has no satisfying future for advancement. The thought of going through the interview process all over again, training, meeting new people to work with or under, getting used to a different schedule is all enough to send me into a panic. So I put it off looking for other oppurtunities for years.

I drive just fine, but if I happen to be going the same place as my family, I let them drive.

Friendships I've had, but no really close ones except with family members. I tend to let other people initiate interactions, and I suppose because I don't reciprocate the way they expect, they have as much trouble reading me as I do them. Most freindships I have don't last long.

Relationships. None. Never had one, and probably never will. That actually doesn't bother me a whole lot, but I know how much more it sets me apart from other people.

I don't cook. When I have to feed myself, I either grab already made snacks or I get fast food. Sometimes I'll make a sanwich, soup or a burrito. I never forget to eat on time at work, but sometimes I get preoccupied on my days off and forget to eat until late afternoon and only then because I'm alerted to it by a headache.

Still live at home with parents.

I voted average. I believe I have moderate to severe AS. I have lived away from home for a number of years and am totally independent and can take care of myself. I have had problems in jobs over the years with co-workers and multi-tasking but am able to work despite my social difficulties. I have depression and social anxiety.

Have one friend that I keep in touch with now and then but no other close friends and no relationship. Have been in very few relationships and have dated. I struggle to make friends but sometimes believe I am better alone.

I can not make friendships last if I do manage to make friends they don't last. Relationships aren't a big deal for me would like a few friends though. Friends seem to be out of my reach.
I don't read people very well and have trouble with conversations starting them and carrying them on and since most communication is non-verbal I find it difficult to read people as well as being shy but trying to get out more and socialise but I find it hard to make friends as most people I class as "friends" are acquaintances. I think if I believe I have made a friend I question if that person thinks of me as a friend. Sometimes I wonder what a friend is.

I can drive and cook although being a female I don't believe I am a great cook I just get by. I am not wired like most women who like to cook and bake.

So I am "Miss Independent!"

I classified myself as high-functioning although I am all over the place once you dig into things,

- Work in a good job but jepordising because of my problems.
- Married but AS massively impacts our relationship
- Have quite a few friends but see them rarely and have trouble making new ones and loose friends by offending accidentally until they loose interest.
- We have our own flat but my wife does almost all the work keeping our lives together - finances, planning, driving, most chores etc etc.
- Cannot drive
- Have serious trouble with cooking meals and the like.
- IQ average or above.
- Can go to pubs and clubs but often become very stressed if it is busy.

The more I try to understand myself I actually beginning to think that I am not as high functioning as I lead myself and others to believe. I think I am very very good at appearing to be very high functioning but it feels very much like a thin veneer.

I'm married to a narcissist for 10 yrs
No jobs
Two degrees
No friends
and I have two kids
I do drive
somewhere on the spectrum. The psych said I have moderate to mild autism.

My level of functioning is classified as "MFA", but in this list I am between "Not very" and "Not at all".
My latest assessment qualified me for 100% dependant in all assessed areas.
But I am verbal.

I had to put not at all because I have not got any friends, I don't have a job (although I do clean out cages for a charity once a week as a volunteer) and I don't really have a social life. I'm startng to accept that this is who I am now though and that I do not need hundreds of friends or a job to be happy.

Not at all functioning, but working around it. Sometimes, I relate to the comatose person who is stuck inside himself.

I picked "not very" as I do have some friends.