I should have been born male.

Post Reply New Topic

DON'T get a full hysterectomy! You WILL hate it. They DO make drugs that can give you the benefits without the problems.



Just out of curiousity, how much weight?

And SOME muscle IS feminine. Women USUALLY have smoother muscle that is more feminine anyway. Of course, it can be more prominent on the legs.

Ok I won't get a hysterectomy. I'll just hope that my antipsychotic meds will stop my periods again like they did last year.
How much weight? Well I can benchpress 50kg now, but I want to go up to 70kg.
I can't say much about my muscles, I've only been running on the streets. I haven't been to a gym since May, when I was at school. When I go to uni on October 4th, there will be a gym in my college, which I will use to exhaustion.

You know, this rings true with me EXACTLY but for me it's the opposite. I hate the way masculinity is defined. Do you really think that being a cocky, cold-blooded, aggressive slob is that much more appealing than being a dainty, weak, but beautiful princess? I mean look at how men are portrayed in commercials... men are almost always portrayed as the stereotypically barbaric, football-watching, beer-drinking fashion. Maybe it's just because I watch a lot of ESPN but I think your typical portrayal of men is just as offensive as the portrayal of women as dainty housewives.

I really don't think either of us is transgendered. I think we have the exact same problem which is that we both have a lot of characteristics of the opposite gender (for you, valuing strength and not being particularly into fashion, etc. and for me, sensitivity, enjoyment of long conversations and emotional connections with people) and thus we are rebelling against our natural (I realize some people will take issue with that term) inborn sexes. The pressure on you to be dainty and beautiful and all of that is just like the pressure on me to be aggressive and never to cry. The stereotypical value of a woman is in her beauty and elegance and the stereotypical value of a man is his strength, aggression, and intelligence. It's not that I don't value strength, assertiveness, and intelligence - in fact, quite the opposite - it's that I resent that there are those who, consciously or subconsciously, lead me to believe that if I don't strengthen those virtues and those virtues alone then I am somehow defying my gender.

I think both of us need to realize that we are moving into a more progressive time when it comes to gender. People are beginning to realize that we are not defined by our genders. I honestly think the VAST majority of gender stereotyping is societal. I mean, think about it... in Greek times, men were valued as truly beautiful creatures. Most statues of Greek men that I have seen portray them not as heathen beasts but as truly gorgeous aesthetic bodies. Imagine if men made more of an effort to shave and be elegant in that way, and yet women stopped shaving their legs and wore exclusively pants and sneakers. Right there, a HUGE percent of the visually obvious gender roles that bombard us all day every day would disappear.

People have hypothesized that Asperger's is a "hyper male" brain. Even if this isn't true, the fact that someone would hypothesize this is telling. People think of men as socially inept, passionate about technology, math and "objective" things like that while being hopeless when it comes to feelings. But what's hilarious is that there are female aspies who display all of these characteristics. Similarly, there are men who are value beauty in themselves and are very nurturing and in tune with their feelings and emotions. The point being, even if there are some TENDENCIES when it comes to men and women, there are PLENTY of people who fly right in the face of those stereotypes.

In conclusion, I have determined that, while there are some things I will probably never fully get over about being a man (the fact that I am not as beautiful as a woman and the fact that I can never have children being the biggest two), I'm sure that if I were a woman I would be really upset about the fact that I am not supposed to be strong or intelligent. I have concluded that for the most part I am rebelling against what I have not because it fits me so poorly but because there is always something to rebel against. I have tried over the last six months to become less obsessed with the gender roles that are determined in large part by society and will never perfectly define anyone, especially not someone as complex as I am. I would suggest you follow a similar train of thought to alleviate some of your worries.

WOW! I can understand, and agree with much of what you said, but you are overly optimistic about having kids. SOME women have said THEMSELVES that they easily just pop them out, but it appears that most DO have some amount of pain, and some make it sound like the worst thing ever.

And women DO have the final say whether a kid will be carried to term, and have the most direct impact on the health of the child.