03 Aug 2010, 7:39 am
CockneyRebel
Veteran
Joined: 17 Jul 2004
Age: 51
Gender: Male
Posts: 121,135
Location: In my own little country
03 Aug 2010, 7:47 am
03 Aug 2010, 8:47 am
ouinon wrote:
hale_bopp wrote:
You don't have to pay $500 for the truth. Not about something like this. Some of you might think its an interesting story to follow as in "what will happen next" but I have known of lots of fakers and it doesn't phase me what the truth is if its going to cost $500 of hard earned money.
I don't want the money of the people who donated to go to waste, or mine if I decide to donate which hopefully I will, but best keep realistic about it. I wouldn't have made this thread if I thought Sean was completely lying. As things went on it I got suspicious, maybe for valid reasons, maybe not. But I don't think enough is being done about trying to find out about this before blowing money.
I don't want the money of the people who donated to go to waste, or mine if I decide to donate which hopefully I will, but best keep realistic about it. I wouldn't have made this thread if I thought Sean was completely lying. As things went on it I got suspicious, maybe for valid reasons, maybe not. But I don't think enough is being done about trying to find out about this before blowing money.
I am not sure how seanmw could find out the truth without going there, ... ie. unless she simply makes less and less effort to keep the story going, as actually appears to be happening, and stops even communicating with him ... so that he might not even have to go there at all. But he may need to continue planning the visit for a while yet before the lack of calls from her becomes unexplainable in any other way.
From where I'm standing it's not "a terminally ill girlfriend" that looks like the biggest problem, it's a "terminally ill girlfriend scam" ... and as such I saw my donation as a way of helping him, by contributing to enabling him to travel over there and check it out. To me the second situation, ( being victim of an emotional scam ), seems by far the worst, ( especially as a lot of cancers are not actually fatal ), and is IMO by far the most probable, going on the data we have.
So I don't see it as money wasted, particularly as I get the distinct impression that she has been backing off significantly from sustaining/performing the "drama" since it became increasingly likely ( and clear to her ) that he would really be able to raise the money to visit her. In other words our donations may already have had a positive effect. We called her bluff.
But I appreciate that some people, who gave money for "a last visit to a terminally ill loved one", may feel differently.
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Important PS. But if, against all the odds, it turns out that she has been telling the truth, then I have also contributed to him getting there to see her.
Donating money from my perspective seems like a win-win situation ... unless seanmw is himself lying, and even then it will have been an interesting and thought-provoking experience. I haven't sent more money than I can afford; the equivalent of four outings en-famille for coffee/drinks at a café terrace for example.
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03 Aug 2010, 8:54 am
CockneyRebel wrote:
The money's been sent, and it should arrive, by early, next week. I hope that your girlfriend can hold on, until you've gone and seen her.
this post sounds like she going to die
she young she going pull through this,
03 Aug 2010, 9:45 am
03 Aug 2010, 2:03 pm
03 Aug 2010, 2:24 pm
b9 wrote:
i do not want to say what i am going to say in order to gloat .i will say it so that people do not get the impression that i have been majorly disadvantaged by my contribution to what is not proven.
i am not phased by my contribution of $100 because i can earn that in an hour.
it is truly not a big deal for me to find that the money went into a sink hole of deception.
i have never given money online before to any cause, and there is not a single chance that i will be divested of my livelyhood by online scammers in the future.
it is $100 and that is all it is. i am not going to give any more until i get some evidence that things are progressing in a manner that is logical and i do believe that the sean fellow is not lying about what he believes to be true.
i obviously see that it is not evident that she is in love with him, and i see that the stonewalling is indicative of a possibility that it was just a superficial on line fling that has been overshadowed by either the development of a life threatening circumstance, or else overshadowed by a retraction from her interest in meeting him.
i trusted hale bopps initial view that it was true, and i trusted seanmw's innocence in the matter because he never initiated this thread.
the girl's pictures seem like she has a rather self sufficient mindset, and it is surprising to me that she is governed to the degree that she is by her mother.
who knows what strings her mother holds. maybe she needs the support of her mother to a degree that she will not defer from her mother's wishes.
there is a saying that goes "suck it and see", and there are 2 possible outcomes to this.
one is that it is all true and she is so sick that she can not feel "romantic", and has a very sore tummy and wishes to nurse it without talking to romantic suitors which add extraneous impedimants to her need to rest, and therefore claims she wass asleep so as to avoid having to talk to eagerly romantic suitors in her time of ill feeling.
the other is that it is all a lie and she has decided that he is not for her and she sparked a story that she considered (in an ill conceived fashion) that was designed to make him lose interest or at least back off and give her room to rest from his advances.
whatever the outcome of this may be, time is ticking on, and after a few days more of insufficient information provided by seanmw, i will think "well maybe that was a lesson i needed to learn, and if i had not invested $100 in it i would not have learned it so well".
i am not sure i made sense with this post because i am flapping away down in the mud bog of my mind tonight. i am mentally not acute.
i will say more intelligent things after i have slept.
Yeah, she's sorta a "mommy's girl" (as opposed to a "daddy's girl", & particularly more so, i suppose, after her father walked out on them). She really loves her mom. Also, she does sort of rely on her mom for financial support to some degree too, though i don't know if those would be considered "strings" i am not phased by my contribution of $100 because i can earn that in an hour.
it is truly not a big deal for me to find that the money went into a sink hole of deception.
i have never given money online before to any cause, and there is not a single chance that i will be divested of my livelyhood by online scammers in the future.
it is $100 and that is all it is. i am not going to give any more until i get some evidence that things are progressing in a manner that is logical and i do believe that the sean fellow is not lying about what he believes to be true.
i obviously see that it is not evident that she is in love with him, and i see that the stonewalling is indicative of a possibility that it was just a superficial on line fling that has been overshadowed by either the development of a life threatening circumstance, or else overshadowed by a retraction from her interest in meeting him.
i trusted hale bopps initial view that it was true, and i trusted seanmw's innocence in the matter because he never initiated this thread.
the girl's pictures seem like she has a rather self sufficient mindset, and it is surprising to me that she is governed to the degree that she is by her mother.
who knows what strings her mother holds. maybe she needs the support of her mother to a degree that she will not defer from her mother's wishes.
there is a saying that goes "suck it and see", and there are 2 possible outcomes to this.
one is that it is all true and she is so sick that she can not feel "romantic", and has a very sore tummy and wishes to nurse it without talking to romantic suitors which add extraneous impedimants to her need to rest, and therefore claims she wass asleep so as to avoid having to talk to eagerly romantic suitors in her time of ill feeling.
the other is that it is all a lie and she has decided that he is not for her and she sparked a story that she considered (in an ill conceived fashion) that was designed to make him lose interest or at least back off and give her room to rest from his advances.
whatever the outcome of this may be, time is ticking on, and after a few days more of insufficient information provided by seanmw, i will think "well maybe that was a lesson i needed to learn, and if i had not invested $100 in it i would not have learned it so well".
i am not sure i made sense with this post because i am flapping away down in the mud bog of my mind tonight. i am mentally not acute.
i will say more intelligent things after i have slept.
. Her mom was the one paying for her college, pays for her cell phone, and occasionally gave her money to make up whatever she was missing on her rent payments for her apartment.
I can understand that because i'm in a similar situation; i love my mom alot, and am pretty reliant on my mom as well.
03 Aug 2010, 7:03 pm
03 Aug 2010, 11:13 pm
MONIQUEIJ wrote:
CockneyRebel wrote:
The money's been sent, and it should arrive, by early, next week. I hope that your girlfriend can hold on, until you've gone and seen her.
this post sounds like she going to die
she young she going pull through this,Well, we still don't know for sure at this point, but definitely hoping she'll pull through.
Reportedly the surgery went well at any rate.
04 Aug 2010, 12:00 am
04 Aug 2010, 12:44 am
04 Aug 2010, 1:56 am
Good luck!
PS. I'm off on a week's holiday with my son and his papa today and will not have internet, so won't be posting again until 12 Aug. I hope everything, whatever it is, works out for you. 
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04 Aug 2010, 2:03 am
ouinon wrote:
Good luck!
PS. I'm off on a week's holiday with my son and his papa today and will not have internet, so won't be posting again until 12 Aug. I hope everything, whatever it is, works out for you.
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Thanks PS. I'm off on a week's holiday with my son and his papa today and will not have internet, so won't be posting again until 12 Aug. I hope everything, whatever it is, works out for you.
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Hope you have a nice vacation
04 Aug 2010, 6:10 pm
04 Aug 2010, 10:18 pm
just-me wrote:
5264443377776444844 wrote:
How can two people be in a relationship when they haven't even met each other? That is what always occurs to me when I read of this stuff. Nevertheless, I'm sorry to hear about your online friend's dilemma, Seanmw. Good luck and all that.
attraction is not only physical, it is emotional. and you can feel emotions for someone you've never met.
I know i fell in love with my BF before i even knew what he looked like or what his name was. i only knew his personality and user name. He felt the same about me and weave been dating 5 years now.
Awwwwwh, cuuute
5 years is a pretty good chunk of time too. You guys thinking of marriage anytime soon
?
05 Aug 2010, 1:08 am
so far at about $370 or $380.
roughly $200 more to go until my goal is reached
