What were you like in school?

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I was sent to three different playgroups as my mother tried to find me somewhere I could settle.

At nursery I was a loner. I once got stuck on a big rocking horse and even though the teacher was stood right beside me I couldn't work out how to tell I was stuck. I was up there for ages.

At infant school my mother would take me home for lunch every day for the first year. I was well ahead of the rest of my class academically. Used to think people were my friends if I knew their name. First clear memories of the elaborate fantasy worlds I create in my head are from this age too.

At junior school I was probably at my happiest. During day-to-day stuff I was fine. I had four friends to be with in class and at break times. Used to insist on only sitting with one of them for lunch each day and on my own on a Friday. Can't really see why they were so willing to go along with that one. Also used to insist on spending last break of the day alone on a bench. Hated school trips, swimming lessons, sports day, basically anything out of the ordinary. My mother used to get so angry at having to come and collect me on trip days. I would volunteer to stay in at break times whenever I could doing library duty or anything. Got quite used to the routine of the place and was reasonably settled.

High School was awful. I hated it and would never never go back for anything. My whole world fell apart and I felt so completely alone. I was totally unable to cope with the changing teachers, classrooms, all the new people, the rules, the much older kids etc etc. I was sent to two different mainstream schools before being sent to a Pupil Refferal Unit when I was 12. This temporary measure, largely for children who have been repeatedly excluded from schools, was where I stayed until I was 16. I was barred from the sick bay for spending so much time there and only got above 60% attendance in two terms over the entire five years (and that was my final two when I was literally counting down the days until I could leave).

Sixth form I managed surprisingly well with. I thouroughly enjoyed the work and just buried myself in books all the time. We were actively encouraged to push ourselves along not be guided by the teachers which suited me just fine. I was also old enough to indulge in my major obsession of the time which made a huge difference.

Other than the brief time at Junior school I have never really had friends. From time-to-time people would 'pass through' my world but it could never be described as a friendship and was only ever temporary.


I hated school and feel the 'experiences' I went through there have blighted areas of my life ever since. The academic achievements I gained were not worth the rest of what I went through. Some of the things my mother did in order to get me to go to school I will never forgive her for and they have damaged the relationship I have with her.

I was disappointed in kindergarten; I had taught myself Latin when I was four.

In grade school I was every teacher's pet and bullied a lot. I liked to hang out in the library, could not run well, and generally avoided everyone as much as possible.

Prep school was not so bad. Being smart there was enough to make someone respectable, if not popular.

I never had any friends in school, nor did I learn much. The whole school experience is just a bunch of bad memories for me.

I had a lot of different friends. I got along with the nerds, b/c they had their own, quirky sense of humor; I got along with the metal heads, b/c I liked metal and I let them work on my car (free oil changes and tune ups!); I liked the skaters, b/c they were creative and had great musical taste, I got along with the band geeks, b/c I played alto sax in their jazz band. I got along with the Asian Invasion, b/c my cousin is Asian and also my best friend (half of my 30 plus cousins are of Japanese descent); the Mexicans liked me b/c I was the only white person who was nice to them and tried to speak their language, instead of forcing them to speak mine all the time (they were beat up a lot). I also hung out with the pot-smoking Ivy Leaguers, the people that ended up going to Harvard, Yale, Columbia, etc.

There were a group of us girls (5, including me) who did our own thing. We hung out with guys in the grade ahead of us and did a lot of camping. We didn't fit in with groups, per se, but we had our own thing and we were always down for a party, no matter who was throwing it.

I found school itself dull and unchallenging, so I was always close to flunking out.

A lot changed my senior year, b/c I picked up modeling again (so the popular people tried to be my friends, but I blew them off and stayed friends with everyone else) and I started dating a guy who was a Junior at UW and swam for them. He was Jewish and completely different than the loser high school guys (they were way too immature). He and I got along really well (most people thought I went to UW with him), but I realized I was a booty call (which I was okay with for a while), but I ended up breaking up with him. After hanging around with college students, who were much more my speed (except for frat guys and sorority girls, I have a distaste for those people that lingers to this day), I dropped out of high school and my parents enrolled me in college early.

College was lonely for me until I entered my major and found people with my same interests (poli sci and law) and then we all hung out and I am still friends with them to this day.

The point is that I really don't understand illusive social barriers like race, I was always just being myself and if it meant that one day I felt like tagging a wall, I hung out with the skaters, if I felt like intellectual chit-chat, I hung out with the Ivys, if I was in a Spinal Tap mood, I hung out with the band geeks.

I think that our ability to see through material things (as in, he wears Pay Less Shoes, and lives with his Grandmother, so I won't hang out with him) is a huge benefit to being an Aspie. I think if I would have been one of the popular people, G-d forbid, I would have missed out on meeting all the interesting people I have been able to meet.

I would have totally hung out with Napoleon Dynamite and Pedro. Gotta love those Moon Boots!

Tallgirl.

I should also mention that I was one of the people who wore Pay Less Shoes, b/c my Mom refused to pay for Keds (which everyone was wearing). She thought the cheap knock offs were the same, which they weren't and the Pay Less shoes fell apart after 3 weeks. My Dad finally discussed the economics of buying quality over quantity, so I finally got some Keds.

However, I started working at 13. My Mom thought only two pairs of jeans, which looked exactly the same, were enough (afterall one pair had to last her a whole school year when she was a kid). I remember feeling nothing but shame at the way I was forced to dress by her. It was so freaking embarrassing. I was tired of her BS, so I got a job and bought my own clothes. I would buy whatever was on the mannequin at the Gap, or whatever was popular at the time and then I was sure to not mess up. My cousin wouldn't let me dress like an idiot either, so I credit her with socializing me.

G-d, you couldn't pay me enough to relive those years...(I know my previous post sounded like I liked my life then, but I didn't, I was just trying to stay away from home as much as possible).

Tallgirl.

My school years never really existed except for my quick 2 year stint in a rather pleasant town for grades 4-5. Read my blog to find out more.

In my highschool years, I lived day to day loving nothing more than the idea of hatred and revenge. Evil, sadistic, less than humans helped to almost destroy me. What was I? I was a quiet, artistic kid that never really bothered anyone. I started out being a bit of a jock in elementary school but then that quickly died as the finiancial situation with my single mom went down hill.

Adding on to what I posted a while back. My moods and performance in school was solely dependent upon my class room setting and how comfortable I felt in it.

Preschool (1984): Although I have no memory of such incidents, mom told me I was nortorious for throwing tantrums in preschool. After one of my worser ones, a teacher their with a masters degree in child psychology threw her hands up in despair at my parents as she was unable to dechiper me.

Grade school (1985 - 1992): In kindergarden I had to go see counslers there on a weekly basis. Once again my memory fails me, but my mom says I "pulled some pretty wild stuff" in kindergarden which resulted in me seeing the counsler.

Second grade was the year I almost wound up getting put into special education. Unlike in kindergarden, In second grade I can remember throwing tantrums in class. I recall having feelings of frustration and despair at my situation, and at my teacher who I didn't like too much, and at my class mates who bullied me at recess on a near daily basis, and not being able to simply deal with things in the way that was expected of me.

Fourth grade I was able to keep my temper under control, however, I didn't care too much for my teacher again. My handwriting was awful regardless of how hard I tired to write neat. My hand would get sore and cramped becasue I held my pencil with a death grip and I would get a calic on my fingers from holding my pencil so hard. My teacher to save work had the class mates correct each others work. She took it upon herself one day to announce to my class that whom ever had my paper to correct should feel free to mark wrong any problem that they had the slightest bit of trouble reading. As a result I got many assignments back as zeros. I was also quite naive and other classmates would do things to purposely get me into trouble.

Sixth grade, I still don't know what to make out of it. Needless to say, I cried quite a bit that year. I also had some theroy of mind issues that at one point nearly got me into huge trouble. My teacher required us to keep a written journal that year of our thoughts, Unfortunately, Only my artwork and a few select class projects from grade school was saved so all I have of grade school are memories.

EDIT: if any of you are wondering, this is where I went to grade school
http://www.mpsd.k12.wi.us/schools_monroe.cfm

Primary School was alright, I spent a lot of time doing my own things.

High School was horrible for a few years. After the bullying stopped, I studied like a nerd and didn't have much of a social life.

Uni is better than High School in that I was never bullied, but a lot of people think I'm weird. At least I'm not physically confronted because of that.

Kindergarden: I was loud, very active and generally liked by fellow students and teachers.

Elementary School: I was quiet, active, ignored by fellow students and generally liked by teachers.

Early High School: I was quiet, lazy and generally ignored by fellow students and teachers.

Late High School: I was outspoken, lazy, ignored by fellow students and generally disliked by teachers.

Quick summary.

I was always very quiet and reserved... had 3-4 good friends who I hung out with and confided in.

I was a very good debater and public speaker... did very well in competitions. Very good grades. A few athletic activities like rugby and track/field... most of my teachers liked me. Most people liked me.. at least superficially.

I was always alone and didn't know how to join in on the playground. I tended to stand out a lot of times when I wasn't able to take instructions like the other children. It wasn't willfulness, I felt helpless for whatever reason to obey and sometimes was frightened about the consequences but still couldn't comply. I was bullied a lot when I was in school which was the hardest of all. I was always quiet and never spoke and wondered why I wasn't like everyone else.

not telling

I went between being an untrusting, reactive loner who got picked on a lot to having groups of friends here and there with whom to be the bane of the authority figures' existence in very uncommon ways and making a place for myself from which I could more effectively stand up for myself and make myself known.

By the end of high school, I was relatively well-liked by a fair portion of the student and faculty body, I had won science fair at school and county levels, I had controlled the school newspaper de facto for a couple years and then some, I had been in student government, the school art show was featuring my work on its advertisements, I had won a National Merit Scholarship, I had aced 6 AP exams, I was the only one in my class going to a prestigious east coast college and I was the piano player at my school graduation. I was untouchable. This is in stark contrast to how I was at the beginning of my time at that school in 8th and 9th grades, where I was withdrawn, violent when provoked (which was often), overmedicated to the point of mental instability, and thought by most people to be the student most likely to shoot up the school. I was still rebellious and facing social troubles here and there, but for the most part, I had completely turned myself around since middle school.