What is it like when 2 Aspies meet?

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Yes, this is definitely true. Very awkward, but great all at once. It was... magical.

interesting - very very interesting. Thats what its like when 2 aspies meet.

I actually have a whole group of aspies who i hang with from time to time.

Ones my best friend, ones my "big brother" figure (AKA male best friend) and there's another who is Just a friend but a little bit more too.
There is my big brothers ex GF and my own ex BF and then there is his mate.

We never seem to run out of things to say but we can get bored with what each other is saying...

We're all too loud and we seem to feed off each other and become quite hyper.

Here's an example:

Aspie Girl: Some of us don't enjoy feeling each other up, eh?
Aspie Guy: Some of us?
Aspie Girl: ...
Aspie Guy: How many of us are there?
Aspie Girl: 500.
Aspie Guy: 8o
Aspie Girl: No, 500 and a half.
Aspie Guy: Oh ok
Aspie Girl: Do you understand? I know I don't.
Aspie Guy: Understand what?
Aspie Girl: Chicken... butt.
Aspie Guy: Yes I think so... Chicken butt is often misunderstood.
Aspie Girl: You're misunderstood often, right?
Aspie Guy: No I'm Mr. Understood. ...often.
Aspie Girl: Oh, you. You must fit in really well, oh, you.
Aspie Guy: Yeah, about as well as a walrus on Wall St.
Aspie Girl: Oh... My.......... Goodness..... Visualizing walrus on street. Doesn't compute. Deleting... Error.
Aspie Guy: It is a rather absurd image isn't it?
Aspie Girl: Yes.
Aspie Guy: I stand by the analogy.
Aspie Girl: Is it standing by you, too? Is it the word standing there?
Aspie Guy: No it is sitting down... It's getting tired. It's a tired analogy.
Aspie Girl: I'll stand with you as a replacement. Why are you standing?
Aspie Guy: Walruses don't use chairs silly
Aspie Girl: You don't look like a walrus.
Aspie Guy: Oh... I suppose you're right. [sits down] Wait, why are you standing?
Aspie Girl: Well, you are squishy. You're a walrus now. I was trying to comfort you.
Aspie Guy: Oh I see. Carry on then.

I've only met another person I know is aspie for sure one time, and I have to say it was ... fascinating. I've probably met others before but without anyone even knowing there is such a thing as AS let alone being mutually aware, things operate pretty much the same as they would with anyone else, because you're both still using the standard social ruleset to the degree you're able to.

It's quite a bit different, in my experience, when you both know where you're coming from, such that there isn't as much anxiety about conforming to the rules. You know those expectations aren't the same. There are some things I noticed still need to be kept in check though, like monologuing, I found I was struggling to control this. Moreso than usual.

I have only meet one aspie. I met him at a party ( with very few people, luckily ) We didn't talk a lot, but we did talk a bit about music. I got along with him quite well. At least very well compared to how I get along with NT people. There were no award silences. I think it might have been easier for me and him to get along since we both share an interest in music. We didn't talk about anything besides music as far as I remember.

I love this sooo much =)
That is so like me with my mate, Jacob. only the walrus is pink has wings and 8 legs O.O

For years now I have been a member of a Geek Group (AKLUG), Several other members are Asper as well. One nice thing about meeting with Geeks is that they already assume that you are a little weird and different - so no need to pretend to be normal - they don't care - show some interest in their computers and they are happy.

What is really nice about being with other Asperger's is that you can toss the NT rules out and just be yourself. Other Aspies will not care that you are weird as long as you return the complement an not care about their weirdness. Silence is only a problem if you are both feeling that there must be conversation between you for conversations sake. At the Geek meeting I go to there are times when several of us sit around and dink with our computers and say not a word - Other times we have lively discussions on topics that would drive any standard NT out of their mind with its "weirdness". These are quite fun as long as you are not worried about maintaining "Proper NT appearance". At first I found it hard to drop the NT act - having spent so many years trying to fit in, so don't be surprised if you find first encounters other aspers difficult or uncomfortable - when you have two people trying to connect through faked social norms - things can get a little weird.

All I can say about meeting with others of our kind is 1. As soon as possible drop the NT rules - 2. Keep in mind that you will probably not have a great connection to all Asperger's - there is just as much difference between Asperger's as between NTs -- and 3. Try it in the long run you will like it.

@scubasteve: that was so accurate!

I have one lady who used to be my old next door neighbour who had AS - in fact she was the one who told me about it and the only reason I was diagnosed.

Despite the fact that she's more than 25 years older than me, we get along great. We have some common interests and others are separate, however it's awesome to have someone who "gets" you, not to mention she has a fantastic sense of humor which means that throughout entire decent in-depth conversations there is constant banter.

The only real differences between us are the level of severity. Hers' is severe, but she can hide it to some extent by acting and comes across as moderate on her good days. I have a moderate level of severity and when I hide it and act, I come across as mild on my good days. Whereas mine can be "explained away" by people, in her case it can't be, it's much more obvious.

What's great is that we can both drop the act around each other, and the other doesn't take it the wrong way. Therefore if I am at her house and making coffee and put something back in the wrong place, I don't take it personally when she tells me to move it etc. She's probably one of the few people I am actually comfortable around - the kind of level that usually takes me years to get to with normal people. We are also both comfortable with silence, we don't feel the need to fill every minute with talk.

My grandfather and father is also rather obviously have AS too (although they don't get on with each other), and my mother was suspected of having it also (although I never met her). I get on with my father very well, despite not having known him growing up. My cousin was BAP, and we also got on extremely well. My first boyfriend was obviously BAP also - another person I got on brilliantly with.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6zS45-L_h7I[/youtube]


LoL.

TheSunAlsoRises

It depends on the personality. Some aspies may be a lot like you on many levels, and others may be different from you. I have met four aspies; which, I really enjoyed to find people with the same condition I have.... though I'm a girl and there all boys, still trying to find an aspie girl to befriend, but I'm glad I befriended them. I've never been rejected by a fellow aspie, two of my aspie friends can't get along; I never really understood why though, but to sum up my observations and expirences it's sort of like meeting an NT but with more understanding, and it's really up to them, and you, to accept or not.

work.

I would say it depends on the individuals. I have two people I work with that I suspect are on the spectrum. I get along with both but one annoys the crap out of me. The other one is like me, diagnosed ADHD as a child but with enough aspie traits that he rates as one on several online tests. We can converse just fine. Neither of us is offended with the lack of eye contact or a more literal manner of speaking. If one of us uses sarcasm and the other doesn't get it, it is explained that it was sarcasm and no offense is taken. We both share a common special interest in cars and so that is always a topic up for discussion. Both of us are also interested in technology, but he is better with computers than I am so I defer to his knowledge there like he does to my knowledge of mechanics ( I plan to have him help me dual boot my laptop in Ubuntu and Windows 7 in exchange for helping him with his car). In terms of age, there is a 18 year difference but that seems to matter little when you find others on that same wavelength. As far as it goes, he's one of the people I first told I thought I knew what was different about me and he guessed Aspergers before I even told him. Apparently he knows quite a few gamers who are aspies and I fit the mold.

As to the other person, well he comes off as more odd than either of us. He speaks of himself in the third person, can't remember names, and comes out with odd statements that seem to be mid thought without context. He's also loud and breaks out in song all the time and wears the same clothes seemingly every day. He also told me that women tell him he's "creepy", which also seems to fit the aspie mold. His special interest differs from mine so we are rarely on the same wavelength. However, I still have him on my list of favorite people to work with as his oddness makes it easier for me to relate to him than some of the more normal employees. We have plenty of conversations on esoteric subjects, which usually end up being me giving a lecture on whatever I happen to be obsessing over at the time. He's never been assessed as far as I know and has not taken the online assessment I told him about either. Therefore, it is impossible to say if he is ASD or not.

That is a very good question. i am undiagnosed but know that I have aspie traits... I can handle small talk, meeting strangers, quite like socializing to a degree and don't really have issues with eye contact. I also don't really like being alone for extended periods of time. That being said I really struggle in intimate/ personal relationships... see my post on aspie-nt marriage for more info on how I am trying to grow and in turn save my marriage.

I recently joined a support group... I had no problem meeting people and engaging in conversation, that being said I could instantly spot many of the people as being aspies, they simply did not know the rules of social conversation etc . I just view every conversation now as one to learn and practice my communication skills.

When I saw this topic I thought asking "Two Aspies meet in a bar.........

continuing with my location joke... I must add.... "Two aspies meet in a bar, somewhere in the NT"

Two aspies meet in a bar; what happens?