Eloa wrote:
I have it with music in my head, I can keep on "hearing" the same piece of music. There is a waltz from Chopin for example which "accompanies" me now for several years.
It happens especially when I have for example to go downtown, because I have to go and buy clothes or anything and to me it feels like a "protection" from all the stimuli in this big city with all that people and sounds and movements and colors, because I have severe sensory issues.
It's a vague theory, but could it possibly be a sort of "mental stimming"? To me it feels like that.
I also have this issue and agree with the "mental stimming" - reading this topic I actually wonder how this has been missed in the diagnosis criteria, I think it's probably just as significant as the physical stimming. I wonder if it develops in some of us because we are taught that most physical stimming is annoying/unacceptable to others. As an adult all of my stims are "invisible" to other people because they are either things I can do without anyone noticing or things going on in my head, because of the way people responded to the ones they could see.
I would really like for my "mental music stims" to be Chopin waltzes, but actually they are usually children's songs! They seem to be the songs I memorised in early childhood (I was good at that) which have stayed in my head ever since. I often find myself humming "The Grand Old Duke of York" or "How Much Is that Doggy In the Window" or "There Once Was A Windmill" without realising I'm doing it and it's a good thing I live alone because that kind of thing could get very embarrassing very quickly! I also have random little tunes which will repeat themselves which I think I made up. I often find myself humming those too. Actually, I guess humming is also one of my stims, but it's kind of only the result of the mental ones.
I do sometimes do it with phrases - often words or phrases will come into my head and I will find myself turning them over and over, especially if I'm not paying attention - but my repetition is most often musical.
I remember when I was a kid, especially when I was just going to sleep, I would hear lists numbers in my head going by very very fast. I tried to explain it to my mother and she had no idea what I meant. Perhaps that was the same thing, though I don't hear numbers any more.