What do you want?

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to actually feel deep relaxation

Thanks Nymeria8

Not to de-rail the thread, but maybe we should have a discussion about what we CAN do BECAUSE we're aspergers.

I want a firm diagnosis of ASD, what I need is to be able to effectively communicate, not push away the couple I care about, find a way to enjoy socializing - even basic discourse - it's just so tiring and odd!

To watch a film and understand 70% of it instead of 20%, to buy toilet paper based on other criteria than "which texture does not feel horrible to me", to go to a party and not feel out of place, not to be accused of sounding stilted all the time, to feel accepted, to feel friendship...

I am thankful for the gifts autism has given to me. But there are challenges---just as everyone has challenges in life.

But along with Asperger's, I have General Anxiety Disorder, and suspected Executive Dysfunction, and possibly OCD.

I would like to have less anxiety.

And I would like to be able to manage my projects better that I feel Executive Dysfunction makes challenging for me.

- the ability to see what's so special about people in general. I could probably live quite happily not talking to another person, ever, and I'd like it.
- not to be so clumsy and accident prone
- to have a maternal instinct for babies. I just don't have one, never will. I can take care of and protect a child, but I don't feel that rush of emotion around them that other people do.
- the ability to run my life without a million lists and routines, to just "manage" like other people do.
- not to find socializing so draining and perplexing.
- not to feel like I'm years and years behind, emotionally and socially.

- To not be so accident prone and klutzy
- To actually be able to talk to someone without having to spend several minutes working up the courage to even open my mouth.
- To be able to listen to things at a normal volume rather than having to continuously asking someone to turn it down.
- To simply be able to understand what someone is saying the first time they say it.
- To be able to sit still without having to feel like I have to stretch, or tap my fingers or feet constantly.

a job that would make me not have to ask my parents for money anymore at 28 years old.
a solid relationship with a partner that actually sees who i am and like or just accept it, therefore id not have the need to socialize much and get drained physically and mentally.

I'd like to be able to turn my sense of hearing on and off at will. I'd also like to be able to turn my senses and my thoughts down at night so that I can sleep (maybe if I could turn my brain off for the night without dying that'd be nice).

Stop my mind from comparing with others, and truly accept all of the traits I am with. I hope it's from heart, not just knowing that. In reality, I contradict myself and suffered too much.