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For those who believe Asperger's/Autism is some sort of gift

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No Escape
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
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31 Jul 2015, 5:38 pm

It's based on a just world delusion. It's the same reason people believe in 'ret*d strength'.



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Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
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31 Jul 2015, 5:40 pm

kamiyu910 wrote:
Jacoby wrote:
What is the purpose of being a gifted engineer if you can't be happy? It's more tragic than anything, a waste.


So happiness is dependent upon asking girls out? I'm confused.
I'm happy because I can be good at my art. Just because I have depression and am not good at socializing doesn't mean I can't find happiness elsewhere. Besides, it's the jerks of the world that make me unhappy, not myself.

If you have a specific need, you can't replace it with a different one. Obviously you don't have that need so you're lucky. The rest of us aren't so lucky.



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Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
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31 Jul 2015, 5:42 pm

kraftiekortie wrote:
LOL...I was just giving examples of how Asperger's could be both a gift and curse.

I wish I were a gifted engineer myself! As it stands now, all I'm gifted at is talking crap! :wink:

Why do you wish that? There are many engineers out there who regret how much time, sanity and soul they sacrificed.



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Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
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31 Jul 2015, 5:45 pm

Jacoby wrote:
Some of us are just struggling to get by, these supposed gifts don't mean much when you hate almost everything about your life. There are momentary distractions but even those are fleeting in their enjoyment for me. Either I improve or I die, there is no amount of coming to terms with myself in this moment that would allow me to be happy. Living in virtual solitude, not having a job, car, not having almost any life worth living is unbearable. Look at the numbers, its a horrific disability.

Exactly. I'm sick of people talking to you with the assumption that the stupid f*****g fantasy la-la-land they believe in is a reality.



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Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
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31 Jul 2015, 5:48 pm

izzeme wrote:
who says i'm here to learn to be 'normal'? normal is boring

aspergers has some strong negative effects, sure, but there are some good things that come with the condition too; it's a mixed blessing.

i am here to join in a shared effort to make sense of the illogical lives of the so-called "normals", but i'm not trying to join them.

If 'normal' is boring, what is 'abnormal'? Exciting?



kraftiekortie
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31 Jul 2015, 6:29 pm

Because engineers provide a way to build things.



Jacoby
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31 Jul 2015, 7:13 pm

kamiyu910 wrote:
Jacoby wrote:
What is the purpose of being a gifted engineer if you can't be happy? It's more tragic than anything, a waste.


So happiness is dependent upon asking girls out? I'm confused.
I'm happy because I can be good at my art. Just because I have depression and am not good at socializing doesn't mean I can't find happiness elsewhere. Besides, it's the jerks of the world that make me unhappy, not myself.


Not exactly, maybe you can find happiness in that but its just the inability to share it with anybody be it friend/lover/family/whatever companionship. You are fortunate to something in your life like your art that can make you fulfilled but unfortunately I don't have that. I wish I did, I wish I was more creative and skilled at a lot of things. It's a struggle to just be independent, I'm older than I should be and I'm not where I want to be in life. I could win the lottery tomorrow and while it would solve A LOT of stress, it still wouldn't make up for what I don't have. Material objects don't mean much to me and don't motivate me, cynically I suppose people might like me better if I were rich and successful but how good are people who do that? I'm not going pin my hopes on that. I'm fighting the good fight, I'm trying to improve myself and get better. I just hope its not in vain, I have so much fear of failing, I don't know what comes next, I afraid of how mindset might evolve in the years to come. Its get better or get dead.



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31 Jul 2015, 7:24 pm

Jacoby wrote:
kamiyu910 wrote:
Jacoby wrote:
What is the purpose of being a gifted engineer if you can't be happy? It's more tragic than anything, a waste.


So happiness is dependent upon asking girls out? I'm confused.
I'm happy because I can be good at my art. Just because I have depression and am not good at socializing doesn't mean I can't find happiness elsewhere. Besides, it's the jerks of the world that make me unhappy, not myself.


Not exactly, maybe you can find happiness in that but its just the inability to share it with anybody be it friend/lover/family/whatever companionship. You are fortunate to something in your life like your art that can make you fulfilled but unfortunately I don't have that. I wish I did, I wish I was more creative and skilled at a lot of things. It's a struggle to just be independent, I'm older than I should be and I'm not where I want to be in life. I could win the lottery tomorrow and while it would solve A LOT of stress, it still wouldn't make up for what I don't have. Material objects don't mean much to me and don't motivate me, cynically I suppose people might like me better if I were rich and successful but how good are people who do that? I'm not going pin my hopes on that. I'm fighting the good fight, I'm trying to improve myself and get better. I just hope its not in vain, I have so much fear of failing, I don't know what comes next, I afraid of how mindset might evolve in the years to come. Its get better or get dead.


True... no amount of my art will get people to like me. I think I've just gotten used to not having friends except for those I can talk to online. I've gotten to the point where I don't want to deal with people because I feel like they'll just backstab me like the others have. I still desire having intelligent conversation with people who know me and won't attack me for being different, though. No amount of art can fix that...


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31 Jul 2015, 7:38 pm

Agustin wrote:
One thing that I'm still not understanding are those who say it's a gift and a curse, so please explain exactly where that's coming from, because it doesn't make any sense to me.


My ability to hyper focus on a topic I love is a gift. My poor ability to plan or manage time is inhibiting.


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31 Jul 2015, 7:44 pm

But you art could be your conversation.



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31 Jul 2015, 8:00 pm

kraftiekortie wrote:
But you art could be your conversation.


That only gets me so far. When we get past that, things tend to go downhill... :( People tend not to want to listen to me talk about my special interest or hobbies, or work, over and over and over again, lol.


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31 Jul 2015, 8:04 pm

I don't want to be normal. It's boring being normal. I can't understand how people who are normal enjoy their lives when it bores me so much I could lapse into a coma. :P

I think that because I'm an aspie I am especially good at memorizing things like entire poems and dialogue from books and TV shows and was above average at reading as a small child. I have been told my talent for drawing cartoons is an individual thing and not because of Asperger's. That may be true to a point, but I thing because it has been a lifelong special interest of mine and because of my attention to details and memorizing is what's made me so good at it.

As a teen I did not easily, if ever, succumb to peer pressure. I somehow failed to see the joys of smoking when nearly everyone my age was doing it - on the school grounds! I never shoplifted, stayed out all night, did drugs, got arrested or spent the night in jail. Man I was SO uncool. :roll:



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31 Jul 2015, 8:12 pm

No Escape wrote:
kraftiekortie wrote:
LOL...I was just giving examples of how Asperger's could be both a gift and curse. I wish I were a gifted engineer myself! As it stands now, all I'm gifted at is talking crap!
Why do you wish that? There are many engineers out there who regret how much time, sanity and soul they sacrificed.
Really? I don't know of any engineers that have looked at the fine things in life that being an engineer has provided for them and said, "I wish that I would have spent more time as a manual laborer instead of getting that stupid engineering degree."

:roll:



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31 Jul 2015, 8:45 pm

Fnord wrote:
No Escape wrote:
kraftiekortie wrote:
LOL...I was just giving examples of how Asperger's could be both a gift and curse. I wish I were a gifted engineer myself! As it stands now, all I'm gifted at is talking crap!
Why do you wish that? There are many engineers out there who regret how much time, sanity and soul they sacrificed.
Really? I don't know of any engineers that have looked at the fine things in life that being an engineer has provided for them and said, "I wish that I would have spent more time as a manual laborer instead of getting that stupid engineering degree."

:roll:


I've known a couple that burned out of it actually, both former instructors of mine. The latter reminded of the first one so much I thought they were related, it was actually kind of weird but it made forging that relationship pretty smooth. I get the impression it is not easy work.



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Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
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31 Jul 2015, 9:04 pm

Fnord wrote:
No Escape wrote:
kraftiekortie wrote:
LOL...I was just giving examples of how Asperger's could be both a gift and curse. I wish I were a gifted engineer myself! As it stands now, all I'm gifted at is talking crap!
Why do you wish that? There are many engineers out there who regret how much time, sanity and soul they sacrificed.
Really? I don't know of any engineers that have looked at the fine things in life that being an engineer has provided for them and said, "I wish that I would have spent more time as a manual laborer instead of getting that stupid engineering degree."

:roll:

No, I never said anything like that. Money isn't everything and it doesn't justify sacrifice after a certain point.



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01 Aug 2015, 5:52 pm

No Escape wrote:
Fnord wrote:
No Escape wrote:
kraftiekortie wrote:
LOL...I was just giving examples of how Asperger's could be both a gift and curse. I wish I were a gifted engineer myself! As it stands now, all I'm gifted at is talking crap!
Why do you wish that? There are many engineers out there who regret how much time, sanity and soul they sacrificed.
Really? I don't know of any engineers that have looked at the fine things in life that being an engineer has provided for them and said, "I wish that I would have spent more time as a manual laborer instead of getting that stupid engineering degree."
No, I never said anything like that. Money isn't everything and it doesn't justify sacrifice after a certain point.
I sacrificed my health to earn an engineering degree so that my children would not have to sacrifice as much for as long to earn their degrees and provide decent environments for their children, and I regret not even one instant of it.

The pain has been worth the knowledge that my descendants will have more opportunities that I did, and that they will be able to take greater advantage of the opportunities they encounter.

Sacrifice isn't so bad once you see the bigger picture.