Heard the best saying ever about "mild" Autism.. Brilliant!!

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Just because one is "behind the curve" doesn't mean one cannot catch up. The pace of progress is never static. It can be accelerated at a moment's notice.

Even without me mentioning autism, people pick up quickly I have it or something else. It's still better for me to not openly talk. I agree with you on that. This has been with me in real obvious ways when I was a toddler....high functioning was never applicable to me.

We'll never be NT no matter how we try.

We might not be NT---but many times we can be equal to, or even better, than NT's in many areas.

I don't believe in "autistic supremacy"---but I don't believe we're inferior, either.

I wasn't suggesting inferiority. We are what we are and find ways to make the best of it.

I agree wholeheartedly.

Oh well, I can't agree with this saying. I'm diagnosed with Asperger's syndrome and I do have many problems thanks to it but I believe it would be a disrespect to those people whose sensory issues are so bad that they are in a constant meltdown, who cannot speak at all and even if they are super intelligent there's no way for them to communicate with their surroundings therefore they're stuck within their destructive heads. I'm not even talking about self-injurious stims or seizures. I think I do experience my autism milder than those.

Even though I am an aspie, I can often have multiple massive meltdowns. In the past four days, I have had about 18 of them just from sensory overload alone. I also have meltdowns from proprioceptive overload, communication overload and emotional overload. There are also times when I can barely communicate and sometimes when I am nonverbal.

I completely respect what you say and how you feel Komamanga, and I understand what you are saying and like I said, I can really respect your perspective. But on the flip side, I believe that just because some people have more severity, that does not negate the severity I have.

I once told a friend who would always tell people who were going through hard times that they should not feel bad because other people have it worse that what I find is that when people say things like that to me, it makes me feel like I am not allowed to feel what I feel when I am going through something challenging just because someone else is going though challenges as well. And someone else whom we might think is worse off, is only worse off by our definition and judgement. We really don't know how that person feels about his own situation. It is very possible that that person could feel worse off but maybe he doesn't. The point is that whether he does or not is for him to decide, not for others to decide looking in.

I also do not believe that people's suffering or happiness or whatever need to be tied in to anyone else's. Just because someone is feeling something horrible does not mean that I am not going through tremendous challenges and that other people should totally dismiss my challenges just because they think mine might appear less challenging than someone else's. That feels very invalidating to me.

I just got a text from an nt friend who is really seriously struggling over things that I consider very trivial. But rather than telling her to get over it or suck it up because people she has never heard of have it worse, in fact, her own husband can be perceived as having it worse because he has a horrible degenerative disease, I acknowledge and understand that her pain is very painful for her even if others might not think it should be.

We cannot judge how others should feel pain or challenges and we should not make it a comparison game. That is my own way of thinking. But like I said before, I very much respect that the way you feel is great for you and I really appreciate that. I just wanted to share how I think about the topic to offer a perspective that I know that many people I have met and spoken to in the past have not thought about. But I do very much respect your position Komamanga as what is right for you.

That's how I feel too, skibum. Yes, plenty of other people have it worse than I do, but that doesn't mean I don't struggle. For some people, it can help to think "Well, at least I don't have it as bad as others do," but to me, being reminded of that feels like it's just invalidating my struggles. Granted, a good bit of my troubles come from the fact that other people see me as capable of functioning much better than I actually can. When people have expectations of you that you can't possibly reach, it's extremely frustrating and hard to deal with, regardless of how much more severe other people's challenges might be. I still try my darnedest on a daily basis and am constantly told that my best isn't good enough.

I know it feels horrible when people disregard your struggles because you're 'too high functioning' or because other people have it worse than you. Your struggles (and mine too) are of course still valid. I guess I might not be as angry towards people as I'm very isolated and have little contact with others therefore am not a subject of criticism.
I'm not trying to make it into a comparison game. There are and always will be people in worse conditions but we are to deal with our own. I just feel like there is more than one topic going on in this discussion. One being the severity levels and the other being about how high functioning autistics feel invalidated as a result of the reactions they get.

Thank you for explaining Komamanga. Yes, as in many threads, there are a few topics going on here but it's all good. It is very good to be able to talk about all of these things.

My mom used to tell me how much worse I could be like I could be crippled or be like my Down's syndrome friend or be severely autistic. I think she was telling me this to make me feel better and how good I have it.

Sometimes I feel guilty because I know others out there have it worse. One year my husband and I were going to take our kids to the beach one weekend but instead after I enrolled my son into his first school, I find out about registration fees and plus school supplies and I would have to provide for the whole class because of what they were asking for and that was basically all our weekend money for the beach because we never had budgeted in school supplies because we were not expecting to pay that much. I was pretty upset because of the change of our plans and I kept remembering there were other parents out there who have it worse and I felt like I spoiled brat for not being able to go to the beach? While there are parents out there who can't even afford school supplies for their kids and even provide for the school and we couldn't afford going to the beach? This would be an insult to those parents. So yes I feel guilty.

Skibum, you are an awesome person.

To the person wanting to go to the beach. I get where you are coming from. You only wanted family time.