You May Be NT (Whatever it means) If...

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Whenever you act inappropriately as an adult it's on purpose. You still do it though, just to be obnoxious.

You think the sole reason for wearing sunglasses indoors is to be a poser. You also don't suffer from migraines and have good vision.

You remember childhood stories of bullying and find them funny, whether you were bullied or the bully. (btw I was both and I am very much ashamed of the fact I bullied someone as if it happened 5 years ago rather than 17 years ago because I don't buy the 'kids being kids' thing)

You think it's easy to get out of being bullied just by using social techniques and persuasion.

You think neurodiversity is a joke

You're deliberately part of the 'outcasts' because you're 18 and want to be cool. When you're 22 you will leave this and become part of the 'corporate world'

Your idea of being an outcast is playing loud music to the neighbourhood all night

You think autistic people lack empathy but you lack empathy for autistic people and the closest you can get is sympathy in the form of 'sorry you're autistic'

You think there is a universal form of 'good weather' which is very bright

You think people who moan about Christmas lights are grinches/scrooges. (You're also not epileptic)

*
(by the way not all neurotypical people are like this, just the ones who don't care about autistic people)

You think it's funny to race your car up and down the street. (Actually, this isn't NT; it's being a punk and an idiot).

This post is simultaneously extremely funny and sad.

You may be neurotypical if...

- you can both correctly deliver and interpret passive aggression
- you want to buy/wear/say/do something purely because other people are buying/wearing/saying/doing it
- you don't know what to do when you have free time and your friends are busy
- you tell your co-worker who (unbeknownst to you) is actually on the spectrum about how a person you don't like "must have autism or something"


^based on observing the NTs around me.

Your opinion on things changes depending on fashion, for example you'd laugh at someone wearing flippers on their feet instead of shoes but if wearing flippers on the feet became the next fashion you will find it acceptable and will no longer laugh.

If having ears became unfashionable, you'd have your ears chopped off in an instant to keep up with the trend.


(Not all NTs are that daft but a lot of younger NTs are).

You understand and know what socializing means. (I honestly don't really have a clue. I don't get it when ladies have asked me in the past "Where do you socialize?" and I can't tell them. Why would someonw ask such a strange question? No idea. The last one that asked me was pretty though.

I never forget working a train where there was a lady who was probably in her mid 20's? Maybe 30's? You know when you have a deep inner knowledge? She was covered in pearcings. I just knew she would die. I didn't know what to say... I didn't say anything. I should have warned her...
I think a few eeeks or months later she had died. It was on the news. She had died from gold poisioning after teying to beat a world record.
I am too shy... If only I could turn back time...

You call yourself "most people"

You like loud music

You have plenty of friends

You may be NT if...

You suspect anyone who doesn't make eye contact with you during conversations is a serial killer.

You call your own interests "hobbies", but when you see the interests of autistic people you call them "obsessions", even if their interests are the same as yours.

You get deeply offended when an autistic person calls themselves autistic and tell them they must say they "have autism".

You use "autistic" to insult others.

You have no real knowledge of the differences between a tantrum and a meltdown.

You don't find going to a party emotionally draining, as long as there is alcohol.

You somehow find great joy in getting completely wasted on the weekend and telling all your co-workers how much fun it was to be acting like an idiot, puking your guts out, and not knowing how you got home.

You think other women have not experienced true happiness unless they have squeezed at least one infant between their legs.

You think it's better to have friends who are complete idiots who treat you like slime than to not have friends at all.

You're female and shopping for clothes and shoes are your life. In fact, you even try on outfits just for fun without buying anything.

You're boring.

You love to talk about the current weather.

The tag on the back of your shirt doesn't feel like a razor blade cutting into your skin.

You can't bear the thought of going for more than one day without showering or wearing makeup.

You think playing with toys, watching cartoons and playing E-rated video games are primarily children's activities.

You do whatever it takes to fit in and be accepted by your peers, even if it's stupid or dangerous.

Loud motorcycles don't usually bother you

You fiddle around with your car exhaust to deliberately make it really loud (younger NTs are more likely to do this)

You are drawn to whoever's the loudest in the room, even if that person isn't a nice person at all

(NT men) It doesn't matter how a woman looks, if she's loud and chatty and wears make-up, you will fancy her, even if she's a nasty b***h or not interested in you

If you were popular, you enjoyed high school because it was the most social place on Earth at the time (trust me, I know of popular girls who liked school)

You cannot handle seeing anyone different from your standards, unless they are very socially skilled. Then you find yourself being drawn to them for reasons you don't even understand

Working full time doesn't drain you emotionally (unless your job is really stressful)

Becoming pregnant doesn't frighten you to death to the point of avoiding it

You only see autism as someone who flaps their hands and talks excessively about one subject, and if they don't display those sorts of traits then you don't believe they are on the spectrum, they are just 'weird'

You hate it when people break certain social rules but you have no problem with going out and getting drunk where you see everyone breaking those certain social rules. In fact you think getting drunk is the greatest thing ever

If someone don't drink you think there is something wrong with them

You gyrate about in front of the mirror triple-checking that you 'look all right' enough to just go across the street to the supermarket

You'd rather get up 2 hours early before work to wash, dry and straighten your hair and apply all your make-up, than to catch up on your beauty sleep

You demand others to make you your coffee and it's totally acceptable, but if someone asks you to make them a cold juice drink you'll just look at them and go "what are you, two years old? Go and make it yourself!"

You get really bothered by women who don't shave their legs

You may be NT if...
You think everyone should be able to do ten things at once
You think you understand disability, but the moment it gets rough you get mad
Your biggest challenge in life is not shiny enough teeth

You are extroverted

You act like every thought and emotion that goes through your head is the latest greatest scientific invention

And then when someone says something you half listen and grunt "huh" and "what" like, it's the etiquette equivalent of "excuse me"




f**k Rolando Morales penis

Even though you do have special interests and have passionate about them and always spend time with them, you may be NT if you only want to share it with people who give a s**t about it and actually know anything about it too. You don't want to talk about it to anyone who doesn't care about it and has no interest.

This is based on what I read in Back To Normal by Enrico Gnaulati.

You might be NT if you feel threatened when someone is a little bit different

You might be NT if you think every weird or socially awkward person is autistic

You might be NT if you are easily able to get over things like a misunderstanding