Forced Conformity/Socialization, My Experiences

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The reason the parents back one of the children up so much (usually a girl) is that they are counting on that person to be THEIR parent in due time. They raise this person and groom her to be their parent when the time comes. This is why, as you said, it feels like having 3 parents: the mother, the father and the sister.

The reason they let that daughter torture the weak one of the children (weak meaning in this context: the weakest one at social manipulation - an Aspie is an ideal target, thus) is they HAVE to feed meat to the lioness.

What the parents don't know is that they're actually creating a monster that will backfire on them and eat THEM up one day. Nobody wins.

I've forbidden my siblings to contact me, because they can't treat me in a respectful manner - given the upbringing they received from the parents about me, and about my sister's entitlement over me. My brother, just like our parents did in their time, has our sister as his "mother". She does horrendous things to our parents and me, and he closes his eyes and keeps condoning her, because he's totally emotionally dependent on her since mother became seriously ill.

Don't give in to your wife in this: if your siblings can't respect you, don't keep in touch with them. If they treat you with desdain or less respectfully than they treat each other, they're a bad influence in your life.

The word is sadistic. It has nothing to do with whether you can swim or like to swim. Their hunger will never be satisfied. It tastes too good. Unless you become a bigger bully (or acquire a big friend) it will never change.

Personally, I love swimming and everything about the ocean.
Still, I get it. My version is here:

Killing gods and monsters, so that I can live.
http://www.wrongplanet.net/postt74224.html

Last edited by Tahitiii on 24 Sep 2008, 4:17 pm, edited 1 time in total.

You described it so well. The only part that made no sense to me was there are 3 older brothers in my family too and they weren't treated this way at all, they were free to choose. The fact my parents made sure they knew I wasn't free sent the message to them that I'm a lower class citizen and don't deserve decent treatment. It did eventually blow up in their faces, and I had no sympathy when it did.

There was something else funny about it to me. There were a few times in my life my sister went away, she went away for a semester at college then came back, then went away for a college trip one summer, then finally when I was in college, she went away to medical school. When she was gone, my parents treated me differently, they didn't compare me to her at all, didn't knock the things I did, and even encouraged me to follow some interests I had(like getting my ham radio license). They had no issue with the things I did when she was gone.

When I was finishing high school and she was finishing college, my parents wanted to move to a small town and I'd attend the small university there. They told me I wasn't going to have to deal with her anymore since she was accepted to a graduate school in another state, and how I'd have it good with her gone. She decided not to go and ended up taking additional courses at the university for 2 more years, and of course making me miserable in the process until she went away to medical school.

They knew how badly it made me feel, but at the same time, they had no choice but to appease her by any means necessary, even if that meant treating me like I didn't count. I eventually decided it wasn't all my sister's fault after all, since she couldn't have done it without them. She came back home a couple of times, and of course it all started up again. I wanted to get away from her and my parents and tried to get a job out of state, but couldn't. I did eventually get away from them and am better off in some ways for it, but still have a way to go and am not sure if I'll ever get to where I need to be.

I think my wife is starting to see the light now, since they are now determined to have a reunion and aren't willing to take no for an answer. Fortunately, my wife is supporting me on this. I just hope they back down and leave me alone.

Bingo/Aha moment/Eureka topic

The words in bold print are what EXACTLY happened to my mother.

Now my sister is going to get it from her evil stepdaughters. I warned her, but she did not listen!! !

Amazing, Greentea. Awesome.