Do You Need To Be Held?

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SilverProteus
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08 Feb 2008, 8:47 am

No, I'm not really into prolonged moments of touch.

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Soon
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08 Feb 2008, 9:03 am

Zamone wrote:

Being held is something I adore, and always have. Unfortunately since I'm not a little kid anymore, Dad won't hold me for very long, and Mum has never been close enough to me, nor does she have time.

But regardless, it is something I crave. but I'm not close enough to anyone at the moment to have that desire fulfilled. (I don't want to just randomly go up and hug people and not let go. That would just be weird) But I remember when I was little, I'd sit on Dad's lep and just be hugged for up to 20 mins on end. 'Till he had to go do something or his leg got sore. I've always wondered if it's just basic hyperaffectionism maybe?

' hyperaffectionism'
No sounds normal to me,and a basic needs. Maybe you could find a fill in. Like find a hug buddy. and have a snuggle time. non-sexual. a few years ago some friends of mine we all had a sunggle time. Now every one has moved on.

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Riddick124
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08 Feb 2008, 9:21 am

Nah, I don't really like being touched, no matter why.

Zamone
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09 Feb 2008, 12:34 am

Soon wrote:

Zamone wrote:

Being held is something I adore, and always have. Unfortunately since I'm not a little kid anymore, Dad won't hold me for very long, and Mum has never been close enough to me, nor does she have time.

But regardless, it is something I crave. but I'm not close enough to anyone at the moment to have that desire fulfilled. (I don't want to just randomly go up and hug people and not let go. That would just be weird) But I remember when I was little, I'd sit on Dad's lap and just be hugged for up to 20 mins on end. 'Till he had to go do something or his leg got sore. I've always wondered if it's just basic hyperaffectionism maybe?

No one I can really think of though... Exept maybe one person, but I see her very rarely. Still worth a try though. If I can explain it to her so she understands.

Soon
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09 Feb 2008, 9:14 am

Zamone wrote:

Soon wrote:

Zamone wrote:

Being held is something I adore, and always have. Unfortunately since I'm not a little kid anymore, Dad won't hold me for very long, and Mum has never been close enough to me, nor does she have time.

But regardless, it is something I crave. but I'm not close enough to anyone at the moment to have that desire fulfilled. (I don't want to just randomly go up and hug people and not let go. That would just be weird) But I remember when I was little, I'd sit on Dad's lap and just be hugged for up to 20 mins on end. 'Till he had to go do something or his leg got sore. I've always wondered if it's just basic hyperaffectionism maybe?

No one I can really think of though... Exept maybe one person, but I see her very rarely. Still worth a try though. If I can explain it to her so she understands.

Well It won't kill you, So the worst thing that can happen is you get a no. So give it a shot. May be you can show her this thread, to help explane to her.

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Afroman
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09 Feb 2008, 10:10 am

I cant stand been held or huged or whatever......... it just feels wrong

I uesd to be held down alot when I was a kid...... cos I went in to bad fits of rage........ that may be why I dislike been held huged or touched in anyway

Like sure I see ppl hugging and stuff and it looks nice

but when it happens to me..... its just so.... bleh... I feel anger and disgust

So its just something I dont do/push away from

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09 Feb 2008, 8:42 pm

dirtyfeet wrote:

yeah.. even when being hugged.. gotta hug me hard, or not at all.

I don't like being hugged hard, but I love hugging others EXTREMELY hard

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09 Feb 2008, 8:43 pm

ebec11 wrote:

dirtyfeet wrote:

yeah.. even when being hugged.. gotta hug me hard, or not at all.

I don't like being hugged hard, but I love hugging others EXTREMELY hard

ebec11 want to come hug me????

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kit000003
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09 Feb 2008, 9:38 pm

I don't always wannna be hugged. It has to be by my rules, my timing, and only certain people, but then, the best hugs are the great big bear hugs.

and talk about touch.... when I was little, my mom used to want to hold my hand and all I would let her hold is my pinky.

Berserker
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09 Feb 2008, 9:40 pm

Touch me and die. :twisted:

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09 Feb 2008, 9:40 pm

Berserker wrote:

Touch me and die. :twisted:

And die of what?

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Mikomi
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09 Feb 2008, 9:40 pm

sodarktheshadows wrote:

this is definately me....
i know when i go to visit my mom, i'll usually try to crawl into her lap...well, it usually means i sit on the floor with my head in her lap, and it's as good as it gets...and usually does the trick. i'll do it with my husband too, but it's not quite the same. something about the whole mommy-thing, i think...
i'm not much on the whole hugging thing, but being held is different...unless it's a good long hug. but i'm picky about who i let hug me.

I don't know the mommy feeling, my mom...wasn't a mom. But the being picky about who I let hug me, I get that definitely.

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Mikomi
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09 Feb 2008, 9:47 pm

Reyairia wrote:

Yes. Although I thought a trait of aspies was the repulsivity to the touch...?
I had that when I was little - didn't like to be touched, but now I would be happy if I got hugged all day.

I recoil at many forms of touch and struggle with people in close proximity to me. However, being held close by my husband is something I find very comforting. Much of it is based on trust. Firm, non-moving touch is good and comforting. Light, moving touch irritates the heck out of me.

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Strapples
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09 Feb 2008, 9:48 pm

Mikomi wrote:

Reyairia wrote:

Yes. Although I thought a trait of aspies was the repulsivity to the touch...?
I had that when I was little - didn't like to be touched, but now I would be happy if I got hugged all day.

Light moving touch also irritates the heck out of me... i like very deep pressure...

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Mikomi
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09 Feb 2008, 9:49 pm

Strapples wrote:

Light moving touch also irritates the heck out of me... i like very deep pressure...

I like firm massages too. If someone just rubs lightly on my skin, it almost hurts. If they rub like they're trying to squish my skin flat, lol, feels GREAT!

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Strapples
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09 Feb 2008, 9:50 pm

Mikomi wrote:

Strapples wrote:

Light moving touch also irritates the heck out of me... i like very deep pressure...

I like firm massages too. If someone just rubs lightly on my skin, it almost hurts. If they rub like they're trying to squish my skin flat, lol, feels GREAT!

yes.. however im not one to like a lot of moving pressure period... i like extremely tight hugs... TIGHT TIGHT TIGHT

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