Psychiatrist: "AS or BS?"

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AaronAgassi,

Would you mind simply opening up a conversation about Cliquebusters with a simple question or observation? I am not bright enough (nor do I have the time) to come up with a well-written response to the entire web page. There are some on WP who could do that, but for some reason have chosen not to. If you don't mind dealing with lesser intellects, then please oblige.

Appealing to your humanity,
Bland

It's up to you what you are interested in, and if you have any specific question or concern.

AaronAgassi

I did not say that your explanation was not there. I said it was difficult to read.

I could employ the method outlined by DrizzleMan to read your webpage.

The reason I'm not going to is because I don't see any value in it for me. If you ask us to read and respond as a favour to you, I don't expect you to make that task unnessarily difficult and painful.

I feel you should make your information as clear and easy to read as you can.

But you're not interested in doing that. As far as I can see, you'd prefer to be obscure.

I'd rather that you simply seek out anything indeed of any value to you on FoolQuest.com and take it from there.

I prefer not to make my eyes bleed.

It's exactly the same for me. I have to translate my mental language into colloquial speech.

Interesting Thread here. Regarding communications with NTs, I have learned to emulate NT colloquialisms as well with a high degree of effectiveness.

Regarding your friends and Psychiatrist, I think the issue may be implicit assumptions or inferences.

When I speak to an NT, I treat it as if I am speaking a foreign language, lets say Quebecois French. It is a dialect of French and does not necessarily match standard French in some of its terms. My normal 'aspie" language is in English. It is inefficient for me to process information internally in French since I am not a native speaker.

Now here is the catch: when I speak "Quebecois" there are underlying cultural assumptions that are loaded into the words. Much like slang - if someone hears me speak slang they assume that I have a full mastery of the context and thereby think as they do. For my "aspie" mindset, the slang or the foreign dialect enable me to provide general meaning however I do not grasp the nuances of the word in context.

At times I would revert to standard French which although understandable by Quebecois, yet it doesn't help me to completely understand their part of the conversation.

So for an NT to listen to me, they become confused. All at once I can communicate in a way that they believe is familiar yet I am oblivious to other aspects of the conversation. Nor can I completely process what they say. Then, for the sake of efficiency and precision, I revert to "English" to not only communicate a deeper thought but also to manage information processing. (my mind works about 5 times as fast as my ability to speak which I suspect is common among Aspies)

In short, NT and AS processing is fundamentally different and neither can fully comprehend what the other is experiencing. Emulation is a great tool, but it is just a tool for survival and success. Much like wood veneer: it has the appearance of wood, yet the object's remaining composition could be something altogether different.

I think that the fact that they are 'frustrated' that you are actiing 'too AS' is a tribute to your ability to adapt and respond, which is challenging and at times impossible for others in our community. For me, when I am overloaded I tell my friends who know that I am going to switch back to "aspie" though I try to accomodate them knowing they can't adjust in that manner. I sometimes feel sad that they are limited but that is the hand they were dealt. There is no known cure for NT.

I wish you the very best Callista.

That's very intersting, but how does that tie in to Cliquebusting?

She's going back to the original topic of this thread, which wasn't about bullies at all.

I got some bullying during my schooltime--mostly, it was about penises--but I learned to ignore it. Thankfully it was never the sort of in-your-face bullying which is impossible to ignore; and as I had no emotional investment in my fellow students, I wasn't hurt by it.

My psychiatrist, I think, believes that anyone with AS, if capable of acting like an NT, would want to act like an NT. Like most people (and despite the fact that she has an Aspie son herself), she seems to believe that AS is a "disorder" or a "handicap" that I must obviously want to be rid of. This isn't true for me; I like being the way I am, and would prefer to learn to be a better Aspie rather than learning to be NT.

My main goals are: Channeling my obsessions into useful pastimes; managing strong emotions, sensory overload, and stress (without hurting myself or going into a meltdown); learning impulse control (this ties in with the obsession control, because my main impulse-control problem is working on an obsession rather than doing something I ought to be doing); and finding my way through college and into an intellectually satisfying job.

None of that has anything to do with learning to be "normal".

At least she, unlike my other counselor, agrees that I do not have Borderline Personality Disorder (a diagnosis given to me because of my habit of causing minor injury to myself or pulling out hair to manage stress--a habit, might I note, that is rapidly decreasing in frequency and severity). Apparently (as the woman herself told me), they label anyone who self-injures with BPD, despite the fact that I do not meet any of the other criteria for the disorder.

I'm going to counseling for depression, for the most part; they will not medicate the depression without counseling, and anyhow, statistically, meds+therapy is the best treatment available for depression. Also, going to therapy gives me a resource I can draw on to get certification of "disability" for my attempts at college: With this, I'm allowed to take tests in a separate, quiet room--so very useful for someone who is distracted by every possible environmental stimulus in a room, from air conditioner noise to students' scratching pencils.

The problemse of bullying where the initial digression, as I recal.

Topics regarding Aspido, the way of the Aspie:
'Not Aspie enough!' at: http://www.wrongplanet.net/asperger.htm ... ic&t=14893 and: 'Aspie culture and Aspie candor: Hope or hokum?' at: http://www.wrongplanet.net/asperger.htm ... ic&t=14935

And do please jump right in, oh brethren in loquacious verbosity! For as I have already related, even on this very forum, I find no end to the wailing and gnashing of teeth over "all them big words!"

Although, in actuality, I do wonder if vocabulary and syntax are ever truly the real stumbling block. Indeed, I can't seem to get even the simplest of points across, no matter how plainly or directly stated. "Ben is Glory."

Isn't it silly how people call them "big words", anyhow? The word's actual length often has nothing to do with it. It would be more precise to call them "little-used words" or "specific words"; but then, that would be using big words, wouldn't it?

Big word, long sentences, split hairs...

I find it difficult (but possible) to read. Discussing whether two shades of aqua are the same colour or not really won't make your article more readable. Why not just change the background?

Over the past 37 years I have learned sometimes painfully the coping skills to get along with NT socity. It is very exhusting , I have to constantly pay attention or I am so lost. The fact that I can hide who I am does not change who I am.I wish that I could just be me.

Because I like the esthetic and just don't see the problem. Care to actually explain?