Are you a self-centred, selfish ass?

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I don't even know any more. I don't like others in my family shuffling about or talking right outside my bedroom door, but when they say, ''you shuffle about or talk loudly outside my door too!'' and I think twice now and usually say, ''yeh but you probably don't get as distracted like I do! Answer that, smartyboots!''

I am, but that has more to do with being a teenager than being an aspie.

I think I can come off as selfish. For example, when I'm busy with something, I don't want to be bothered by anyone and I'll get annoyed if they interrupt me. I also have no problem with spending time alone and people think that is selfish too, sometimes. Similarly, people don't like it when I'm honest. They think that I'm being harsh or intentionally hurtful. I've learned to lie, if only so that they don't get mad.

But most of the time, I think I'm a pretty helpful and unselfish person. I'll drop what I'm doing and help out someone when possible. The key for me is just knowing when someone needs help. If they don't tell me specifically, or ask directly, I won't know that I'm supposed to get up and help them or take any action. If it's very obvious (ie person coming in the door with a huge box of stuff), then I'll know to get up and help. But otherwise, I have trouble with "reading the atmosphere". I've noticed NTs do this, though it's a little bit of a dying art. Essentially, though, there is an intuitive way of knowing when someone needs help. I struggle with that, but I've been trying to learn.

Wanting time to yourself isn't selfish.

I've been accused of it...but I had not set out to intentionally be that way. Being the youngest of 8, I learned that if I wanted something, then I had to get it for myself/sometimes even do BATTLE to get it for myself....add this to the AS traits of not reading social situations & BAM (as Emeril says) I look like a self-centered biotch.

It isn't, but people have accused me of it, all the same. For example, if my parents want to watch a movie, but I'd rather do something by myself, they get upset because I don't want to join them. Sometimes I feel bad and will join them, but sometimes I want to just go do stuff alone, too.

I see those traits in myself but I wonder if they are just my imagination.

My parents would agree that I am selfish, but also mean & hateful. Maybe I am. I know my dad is selfish, so I had a pretty good role model for it. He most likely also has Aspergers. I guess it takes one to know one.

yes, sometimes i am a self-centred, selfish ass. i am a human, so i am not perfect. but i don't think i am worse than your average NT or aspie.

I remember in my last relationship, my ex would tell me I was being self centered just because I wanted to go to bed and he wanted to stay up. It was late and I was tired and he wanted me to stay up with him.

I do not see how this is selfish or self centered (whatever word he used but they both mean the same thing to me anyway) to go to bed when you're tired. In fact I think it's selfish to expect someone to stay up when they are tired just because you want them to be with you.

I think what your parents are doing is trying to control you by making you feel bad so you do what they want. It's called manipulation. Or maybe its not their intent and they want you to join them so bad and they think you are just deciding to be with them.

Yes, I admit I'm selfish and self-centered. And I can be mean and hateful too, though I try to minimize their effect to my best knowledge.

I have altruistic traits too, although I really don't know whether it's a result of me being selfish or a genuine empathetic trait of mine. Maybe both. In any case, I'm similar to others in that when it's pointed out to me what to do for help I feel the urge to do so, but when I'm supposed to know it all by myself I often miss the signs.

One reason why I try to treat people around me equally kindly might be that I can not make effective and lasting differentiations between them, as my memory doesn't work that way. Besides, somehow I don't want to be in bad relation with anyone, which must be obviously an illusion...

I'm self-absorbed and kind of self-centered but I'm super polite and accomodating/pushover due to my social anxiety.

I am absolutely not selfish in anyway.

I've actually heard many people on the internet say this about us. I wonder if they've just had bad experiences with a few self-centered aspies and assume that we're all the same, or whether there is something about us that NTs misinterpret as being self-centered when it isn't intended to be, or whether there really are so many self-centered aspies out there.

I don't consider myself to be self-centered or selfish at all. I do a lot of selfless things for other people. I'm always ready to help others out, listen to them, do them favors and such, and I often try to do nice things for people without being asked, just to make them happy or help them in some way.

I don't know where all this bad rep about aspies is coming from, but I've encountered it myself online.

This, mostly.

I don't have anyone else in my life to concern myself with outside of my intermediate family, so I almost feel as if I don't have a choice but to be self-centered....

A lot of times I might appear so, but I'm pretty altruistic. I love helping other people. I just don't know how sometimes.