Are all AS people slobs?
Ditto. I actually kind of enjoy cleaning, and I'm good at it. If I can't manage to get a job in psychology research, I'm going to see if I can find an assisted employment program that will let me become a janitor. I haven't been able to manage it on my own, but maybe with a few accommodations, I could. That, or some kind of job that involves sorting, organizing, and patterns.
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richardbenson
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I hate cleaning. My husband, though, likes things neat and clean. It has been difficult at times, but I have worked on cleaning more, and he has worked on not freaking out if things aren't perfect. For instance, I hate washing dishes; this was a real problem when I first started staying home with the kids because I just wouldn't do it. I have since worked out a system where if I am cooking, I am washing dishes. Now it has become a habit. I go into the kitchen to start the kids breakfast, lunch, or dinner, and while it is cooking, I wash whatever dishes are left from the last meal. I'm terribly disorganized most of the time. I homeschool my daughter, and I take great care to be organized and particular with our school related things; however, my own personal desk space is a mess. I do laundry. I don't sort laundry. I wash everything together in cold water. We each have our own hamper so laundry is only sorted by the person to whom it belongs. I do not fold clean laundry. I'm terrible at folding anything more complicated than a towel so I leave the clean laundry in our bed, and my husband puts it away before he goes to bed. It took a while to work out exactly how household chores would be divided, but we have now been married for 7 years and have worked out a system that works for us.
Colton you're a douche bag. First, the title of your thread sucks. No, people with AS are not all slobs, they are people who have issues that make it difficult to do certain things. Organization can be one of those challenges. Would you post on a down's syndrome forum asking if all DS people were idiots? I'm thinking you probably would.
Second, if you think of her as a "slob" why are you with her?
Third, you say "if I have my aspie move in". You're not bringing home an animal, she's a human. If she were NT you wouldn't say 'if I have my NT move in'. You would say 'if I have my girlfriend move in'. Instead you think of her in terms of her condition. If she were black would you say 'if I had my negro move in'?
If you're going to come to a forum like WP with questions have some f*****g respect for the people who use it as a support site.
Rascal77s, I see your point, but humans are animals; primates to be exact.
I'm not much of a cleaner and wouldn't want to live with anyone that tried to pressure me to clean. If they want it cleaned they can clean it themself.
Cleaning is hard work and it generally takes me a long time to get any cleaning done if I do it at all.
That's how I see it too.
In addition as I've already mentioned here, I'm not comfortable with a very neat environment, cleaning is boring and a real drag and very low priority.
Yes and no. Upbringing may make most people behave a certain way, but not everyone will do so. As far as choice goes, if you are a low energy person then it is difficult to keep up with things at times.
True. I have a strong sense of self and no amount of upbringing could persuade me to do something I found wrong or pointless.
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Last edited by Skilpadde on 31 Oct 2012, 10:35 am, edited 1 time in total.
Lepidoptera
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I don't think this is an aspie/NT issue. I've known NTs who are complete slobs. I hate cleaning but I have a very neat house. I've received lots of comments about this over the years but I had no idea why my house looked neat. It didn't seem like I was doing anything special. When I discovered AS I learned that lining stuff up was a common AS trait. Turns out I'm rather obsessive about lining stuff up around the house so that alone goes a long way toward making my place look neat even if it's not overly clean. I do this without even thinking about it. Everything is either lined up, centered or arranged symmetrically somehow. I've always done this even as a kid. I don't have a lot of stuff sitting around because I hate to dust and that contributes to a neat if not spartan look.
My boyfriend can't function in clutter... though I am sort of a cluttery person and work on many projects at once... Getting ready for a photo shoot makes me crazy because he can't find half of his stuff and asks me if I have seen it despite the fact I never touch it. If there is a place for everything and I say ok... lets get this house in order he puts things (mostly) where they go. He is not lazy he just needs direction. So if I say.. will you clean the bathroom it is best I have a list of what needs to be done other wise the toilet, sink and tub get clean and that is it. It use to make me absolutely bonkers because his hamper would be empty but every item of clothing he owned would be dirty and surrounding it. If I did it for him he would stack the folded clothes on the floor and never get around to putting them away. I have two choices... just do it for him, which has turned out to be the less stressful for me, or direct him... will you put your clothes in the hamper (every day) will you wash them will you put them away. HOWEVER... he has his routine in other areas so I just fine what works for him to do and I do the rest. He runs the small sweeper every day, sometimes several times (messy 2 year old) picks up her toys about 75% of the time, cooks dinner and mostly cleans as he goes, and mows the lawn. He also does better maintaining tidy than creating it. SO while he is out of town I got a label maker and am converting one closet completely into photograpy gear with labels and reorganizing all of it along with the rest of the house.
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Disorganization and messiness is also a sign of impaired executive functioning, which is a feature in multiple conditions including autistic spectrum disorders. It is not always, or even necessarily ever a personality trait.
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Not doing those things can also be an issue with executive function and sometimes difficult to overcome, for just one example. You don't have to be bedridden to have significant difficulty with consistent cleaning.
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You would be quite wrong on that point. If it were these things, ADHD wouldn't be a diagnosis, and people who need staff to help them clean wouldn't have much justification for it.
The moral judgment of "it is something wrong with your personality" that Joe90 is talking about is simply factually untrue. It is also factually untrue that everyone has the luxury to choose what is easy or difficult for them to do thanks to disabilities of all kinds.
I have to strongly agree with you on that. I know my boyfriend is NOT lazy. It is not like he leaves rotting food sitting around. He has common sense. Messiness and being a pig are two different things. His mess usually comes from things like.. Ok, I know I am giong to need to use this so I will set it here (with about a dozen things) and the number of items gets messy. Or, at night he changes into shorts and a t shirt and also wears the same when he gets up but when he dresses for the day it is usually either jeans or a different style of shorts. So he takes something off thinking oh I will just throw that back on in the morning or I will wear those jeans again tomorrow but then goes to his drawer the next day to get new clothes out. My clutter is similar... I am working on 3 christmas gifts.. oops 4.. I like to do parts of one then go to another because I love crafts but some parts of them are tedious and lack creativity and so by moving around I stay focused. Packing them up and unpacking all the parts is time consuming and sometimes will ruin the project so I just leave them in different places... oops again 5 gifts lol. This gives a cluttered appearence but it is not from being lazy it is from being a multi tasker. A totally different animal. The part that is upbringing is that my mother grew up dirt poor. Often having no food and many christmases with no gifts. She is by far not a horder but she does hang on to things. You can safely walk through her house but her attic is packed, closets are packed.. So I tend to hold on to things and am trying to break the habit. She is too... she clears out her stuff into my house
I put it in a box in my garage and when the box is full I take it to goodwill. We are also very sentimental. I am 42 and have the doll crib my grandfather made me when I was 5. (among other things some of which I am slowly getting rid of.. my cap and gown from highschool etc)
Disorganization and messiness is also a sign of impaired executive functioning, which is a feature in multiple conditions including autistic spectrum disorders. It is not always, or even necessarily ever a personality trait.
Of course personality traits play a role as well. People are all over the spectrum with absolutely every habit you can come up with
That's a bit like saying that being introvert is a brain dysfunction and that you should be extrovert by default if you're brain wasn't sick.
Or any other differences people have.
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BOLTZ 17/3 2012 - 12/11 2020
Beautiful, sweet, gentle, playful, loyal
simply the best and one of a kind
love you and miss you, dear boy
Stop the wolf kills! https://www.thepetitionsite.com/takeact ... 3091429765
I think the question he was asking was more..."due to her being AS will she have a more difficult time being tidy like "I" am if we were living together" Not so much is she messy because she is Aspie. Many Aspie traits are similar to those who are NT it is just the reason behind the traits that make it Aspie related. For example.. Due to being Aspie my boyfriend flat can't concentrate or function well in clutter. But going back to my example about setting one thing down that he will need to use later then another and anohter he has created clutter unintentionally. He didn't set down a pile of things just one thing, but one thing many times becomes a clutter. Also, due to being Aspie he is overwhelmed by the task of decluttering. Not sure where to start or the best way of going about it. However, he is completely able to declutter when given a set of "rules" or directions. Put the camera gear in the camera closet, put your work gadgets in this basket marked work gadgets etc.
Although we (NT's) try to post clearly in way's those who are not understand what we are asking.... we don't always succeed. I can see where some may have taken the conversation as we NT's just finding one more thing to blame on AS. I completely understood what he meant without the need for him to clarify but I can see where others may not. It is my opinion and I would feel fair in saying Colton's as well that we view those with AS as being normal people as much as anyone is normal.. who just receive, process and react to information (verbal, body language, facial expression) in a different way and we feel that we have the ability to do things to make the lives of those we love less intense confusing and stressful. To me the differences between AS/NT is very similar to cultural differences. When I learn the culture I am better able to adapt and communicate. I know that is why I am here. To learn the AS "culture" not to blame human characteristics on a diagnosis.
