The Universe does not revolve around the autistic community

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I did very well academically when I studied and yet I never know where I put anything...

I am beginning to wonder if I have alternate dimensions somewhere in my house that property just falls through randomly...I jest. But I am remarkably talented at losing things yet still managed to get good grades.

Um as to the ego thing, don't people just get excited by something and ramble?

That is all it is with me. I find whatever subject I am fascinated by so exciting that I babble on and forget myself. It has nothing to do with ego...I am just excited. It's completely innocent but people will always paint it as something bad or deliberate. Why?

You can't just let someone be excited for a moment without judging them?

I love love love to see someone getting excited over something they are talking about. It makes such a wonderful change from listening to everyone constantly complaining and hating themselves or bitching and gossiping about others.

I'd rather be around the excitable rambler who gets all fascinated by what they are babbling on about. It is so adorably sweet to see.

Humans can be such miserable critters though...they don't see the sweet. All the see is some negative reason they have attached. Shame on the human race. Curmudgeonly buggers.

Even if males are more likely to suffer from something like megalomania...not sure it is a part of autism, or just a trait some people with autism also have. I myself am female but I can't say I've had many if any female oriented interests. I made it to college, just not through it...more due to not being able to handle the stress than anything else.

Last edited by Sweetleaf on 29 Mar 2014, 10:02 am, edited 1 time in total.

the world doesnt revolve around around our special interests.

So it helps to learn to seduce folks into being interested in hearing about your special interests.

But ofcourse the world DOES around us on the spectrum! Everyone on the planet spends their time thinking about the one percent of the human race who are on the spectrum! Thats why the paparrazzi follow us all around!

Very nice

um... potato.

An observation about the world I wonder around in when I am trying to be social.

Meh, I say let the excitable people be excitable.

I'm obsessed with The Kinks....gee, my musical Ego must be huge.

*sarcasm*

Does anyone here had many people (maybe consensus) disagreeing with what one says about one's own special interest(s), even though those disagreeing with you aren't as intensely interested as you are?

Myrtonos: what do you mean when you use the term "ego"?

Not about the op as I don't know, but from the perspective of object relations, the thing is, once subjective understanding of a particular term is programmed into ones thinking in such a way as to fit in with a larger idea set and support the validity of that set, then to try to explain a specific meaning of a term like ego can take meaning away from the framework of the idea set which idea set in some way represents being oneself. Not saying it is true in this case, but probably true in general, as implicit meanings and implied meaning serve as bridges in communication. In order to be oneself one needs to express oneself.

A communication problem can arise when two idea sets are kind of mixed together, but it is not completely clear in ones own mind because one is still sorting it out. For instance, a term like ego can imply competition, but that does not exactly fit in with the special interest concept, though there could possibly be some kind of connection if one is vying for idea territory by the expression of a particular idea set and putting the world inside it represents being oneself. A particular idea set or framework has come to represent oneself, so one needs to assume the other person has understood or can understand in order to feel like one can be oneself. It is a drive which can be psychologically perceived as a matter of life or death. From the perspective of object relations theory and also theory of mind, in order to be oneself, one has to assume that other person already is oneself, so to clarify an unclear meaning could represent the demise of ones own sense of self in that in order to live, one cannot look at certain (other) material which is outside that framework that one is trying to fit everything into. A lot of Melanie Klein's theory of object relations was based around warding off the threat of ones own aggression toward an outside object (person). For instance if an infant asserts himself he fears he will be destroyed by his own aggressive impulses, and unfortunately some certain children are not given enough developmental experience to feel safe. This is where special interests can come into play as a device to protect oneself against ones own aggression toward others and from the greatly feared retaliation.

This is not to imply a person should not have special interests. It should be encouraged for children to develop special interests, and everyone should do what is interesting to himself. This is what gives life meaning, but the perspective can become distorted. There is a big difference between wanting to share something one is deeply interested in, which is natural, and believing that oneself IS ones own special interest and feeling on an unconscious level that if one does not share it one will die, especially since to speak and communicate really is to live. In this sense, for some people who have not been able to individuate, forcing ones own special interest on other people is like fighting for ones life, and this could be perceived as competitive and so referred to as ego. I cannot really tell if the op understands it from this perspective or not, but he very well could be, which would explain what he means by the use of the word ego here.

Whew....:-)

I never thought aspies talking about their interests had to do with ego. I thought it had to with them enjoying it and wanting to always talk about it because it's their favorite and everything else is boring to talk about.

Same. I think it has to do with the elation that comes with our rigorous interests, and sharing them is ubiquitously considered a way of bonding and conversing people. An inability to pick up whether people are truly interested comes from deficits to a theory of mind and picking up social ques. I don't think talking about our interests and talents generally stems from our ego.

I do not know if you read what I just wrote and ,if so ,were able to understand it, or if not so easy to understand, tried to, but I did explain how ego could fit into the picture in terms of competition for idea 'space,' if to oneself this fitting outside 'world' into this self-defined space or capsule means dear life. Personally I would not use the word ego, though, as it is too confusing.

Obviously ones own special interest is not boring to oneself and one is going to get pleasure out of talking about it to others. Most everyone is basically the same in this regard, and yet people are saying this special interest thing when carried to the nth is a particular characteristic of autism, and autistic people themselves are saying this is the case, and I would agree.

But the other side of the coin of pleasure is pain.

https://www.google.com/#q=tedium+and+pain
https://www.google.com/#q=tedium+painful

This.

Autism spectrum folks assume that the world revolves around the thing that interests them. Not around THEM as people. And it can be a rude awakening to learn that world is not obsessed with what you're obsessed with.

The issue of special interests has nothing to do with ego, but with special interests.

However aspies/auties do often talk as if the universe did revolve around them as a group. Folks on WP worry about what the world thinks about aspies when most of the world doesnt know aspergers from hamburgers, and never thinks about aspies at all. So in that sense you could say that "aspies need to learn that the world doesnt revolve around them".