16 Apr 2016, 4:00 pm
16 Apr 2016, 4:20 pm
16 Apr 2016, 4:35 pm
16 Apr 2016, 4:45 pm
16 Apr 2016, 4:54 pm
16 Apr 2016, 5:04 pm
16 Apr 2016, 5:59 pm
We must be hanging out in different Aspie communities. While many are unintentionally rude, most Aspies I know are never intentionally rude.
My high school eduation runs counter to this... and anything I've learnt about medieval culture ever since... and I'm born and raised in Europe, which means this is the history of MY country and MY people we're talking about...
I mean no offense, but... what kind of crap have you been reading, then, if I may ask? Because, really, anyone who thinks chivalry only applied to battlefield situations doesn't have a clue what he / she is talking around.
On the other hand...
a**holes don't care about whatever social cues a girl sends out. If they want her, they take her, against her will if necessary...
Nice guys do care about whatever the girl wants... and they're typically out of luck if they're too insecure or socially inept to figure out when is the right time to take initiative.
What makes you think that?
Are you for real?
Which member of this forum implied that he viewed any available female as a possible partner?
There's "I don't like you", "I like you as a friend", "I like you as a f***-buddy" and "I like you as a spouse". Whatever category someone puts you in may change due to circumstances, but I can't think of any other category besides those four...
A woman's feelings towards you may fluctuate between one of those four categories, but that doesn't mean those categories don't exist.
When you take up the tools (in this case words) of misogynist a**holes, and embrace their way of thinking and terminology... then you are indistinguishable from them
Obviously... but - again - I don't think that's what most of the men on this forum are like or what they're trying to emulate.
16 Apr 2016, 11:53 pm
17 Apr 2016, 12:33 am
17 Apr 2016, 5:20 am
17 Apr 2016, 7:20 am
17 Apr 2016, 7:43 am
Most of my friends are women these days... and I truly don't know what you're talking about.
With exception of a handful of Ivy League universities, American education is generally known as pretty poor. Thank you for illustrating why.
Where I went to high school, I've been trained in reading both Medieval Germanic texts and ancient Roman Latin texts.
I didn't insult you. I was merely critical of the poor education you seem to have had.
Anyway, here's Wikipedia confirming what I've been saying about chivalry :
[...]
Over time, its meaning in Europe has been refined to emphasise social and moral virtues more generally influenced by Arabic concept of chivalry، and the Code of Chivalry, as it stood by the Late Middle Ages, was a moral system which combined a warrior ethos, knightly piety, and courtly manners, all conspiring to establish a notion of honour and nobility.
Note where you said "any woman under him". Rules of conduct between nobility didn't always apply when approaching people lower in the social hierarchy.
Now you're just projecting your own inflexibility onto others.
17 Apr 2016, 8:07 am
17 Apr 2016, 8:24 am
17 Apr 2016, 8:52 am
Accepting a fairly modern idea of chivalry, my experience has shown me that, in my case it appears that way on the surface.
I was raised by southern parents in the US. That meant a fairly obvious social code and manners. And it gets pounded into you. Some of it is good.
I get dunned in the north for saying 'yes ma'am' to women because up here, the big complaint is "I'm not old enough to be a ma'am!" But, then they learn I have a daughter who is about to turn 31 that I've been saying 'yes ma'am' and 'no thank you' and 'please' to since she was born. And, she is teaching her daughter the same way. They learn, that for us, it is respect for all and not age related. So a form of chivalry and social code in one area is actually frowned upon in another area. They just learn to live with it because I literally cannot, nor want to, change that. It has served me well in my life.
And, at my age, old dog-new tricks on many things. Yep, I'm crusty and set in many of my ways.....you poor bastiches!! 
So, the way I was trained to speak politely and open doors, let people pass, say excuse me, ask to be excused when leaving company and those type of things gives an impression of sophistication that I just really don't have beyond a few simple rules of social engagement.
It gives a veneer of chivalry. But, when you get to know me and the mask cracks a bit or get into a situation that my social training has not prepped me for (a huge amount of things as it turns out), or I do the things I am learning that I do unconsciously, well, then I'm just a normal doof just like everybody else.
It makes it worse because on the surface, they expect this very refined gentleman. Underneath, just below that thin layer of refinement lurks the heart and emotional control/maturity level of a 12 year old boy. It shatters that illusion and creates an environment of confusion and/or distrust between myself and others.
This is me in an old joke:
A: When I got married, my husband gave me a 2 caret ring and he's already VP of a big corporation!
Everybody: ooooooo
Me: That's nice. Smile...
B: When I got married, my wife was already head of her own foundation and traveling the world as an amboassador of peace throughout the world.
Everybody: ooooooo
Me: That's nice. Smile...
(This goes on for a while then they come to me...)
Last person, to me: So, what did you do when you graduated?
Me: I went to culture schooling
Them, happy: Oh really? What did you learn?
Me: I learned to say "that's nice" instead of "BS"
That's it. That's me. Just one mistake away from wiping out that sparkly surface and exposing the quagmire roiling below.
17 Apr 2016, 9:50 am
It used to mean, “I’m willing to fight to the death to suppress this idea I don’t like”.
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