Aspie solidarity is a big fat myth

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That's nice you got someone who listened. Tears of joy perhaps?

Yeah she was worthy of the affection. Like Harry and Lloyd in Dumb and Dumber my opportunity will come, Ive just got to keep my eyes open.

This is my problem, I don't seem to have my eyes open on the right things. I don't see opportunities that I have had until they have passed me by. Too much attention on the detail, and not seeing the whole picture. I am still hopeful though.

^He he, my quote marks went a bit wrong and I forgot to preview, sorry.

I’ve grown so used by now to the idea that the natural and healthy thing for a woman to do is to steer clear of such an excuse for a man like me that if one were ever to show that kind of interest, it’d be hard for me not to conclude she’s out of her mind and I’m abusing her merely by talking to her. I’d also expect some third party to intervene sooner or later, cut me off from her and give me my just deserts.

Are their dating sites for people with Autism? Maybe you could try those?

Last edited by Chronos on 27 Mar 2018, 9:28 pm, edited 2 times in total.

I have felt like people ignore me on here sometimes, but I ignore my feelings because in real life I learnt a long time ago that I don't have a good grasp on why other people do the things they do, and in my experience it's even less clear when it comes to online interactions.

Just a thought. I'm sorry if people really are discriminating against you here. My guess, however, is that people might be more likely to log onto WP on days they're feeling crappy. I can't speak for anyone else, but that's the case for me. If I'm feeling crappy, I'm also less understanding of other people's situations. Combined with the fact that we all struggle with putting ourselves in another's shoes to varying extents... I just wouldn't necessarily take it that people are discriminating against you.

I've realised that because I have been told by people a lot in my life that I'm weird, too intense, annoying etc I often assume if someone doesn't tell me what they're thinking that they think I'm weird, too intense, annoying etc. It makes sense why it happens, but I'm learning that I just need to ask in each situation what the other person is thinking/feeling if I need to know.

Last edited by plokijuh on 27 Mar 2018, 6:19 pm, edited 1 time in total.

You see, Fifasy.

This thread has expanded to five pages.

Doesn't this show that people care?

It's true. Frequently people who come on WP are feeling like crap, and "have their own problems," and don't have time for your problems (not as Fifasy specifically----but as any person).

I started a thread asking people what they thought of me (yes, egotistical, I know). The thread did not extend to five pages--like yours did.

My honest impression is that most people here feel "solidarity" for other people in a similar position as they are in.

I agree with Fifasy that people on the spectrum lack solidary but if it's solidarity he wants he needs to first start with extending it to others because he started out his post making an unsubstantiated claim against women on the spectrum that minimizes the problems and hardships women on the spectrum face. That is not solidifying that is polarizing.

I feel like fifasy has already apologised for the unsubstantiated claim re: women. He admitted it was out of line.

People see only what they want to see - including me

I'm just saying that people with Asperger's/autism---and people on WP---frequently feel solidarity with others in a similar position, no matter what gender.

Nobody has a "monopoly" on suffering.

And I would tell Fifasy that people don't think of him here as a "third-class citizen." I believe this is an incorrect perception.

Oh I was referring to Chronos bringing up the male/female thing again. Not picking on Chronos. Maybe she didn't read the middle of the thread. Just didn't want fifasy to get more flack re: that specific issue, since he's recognised his mistake.

I wish Fifasy would think about his art more.

When people think about their art, they think less about peoples' impressions of them.

They believe in their art, and defend their art, and that makes them a more substantial person than a person who thinks people are always putting him down.

Discussing art will, probably, cause people to put him down less.

My post was not meant to be provocative, it was meant to call out the sexism in the OP, which the OP recognized and apologized for when it was pointed out to him. Usually I do just report stuff like that when I see it, but sometimes I get fed up with reading about how much easier autistic women have it on this site and I say something in the thread. That is not provocation, it is me expressing how tired I am of reading that crap. Obviously I'm not alone in this sentiment, as many other women expressed similar opinions after I did. I use sarcasm when I am fed up. Maybe my tone wasn't helpful as it could have been, but it's not my job as a woman to always be helpful in the face of sexism. Tone policing how women respond to sexism is not the way to deal with sexism when it is expressed. Sometimes we get frustrated and angry when guys say stupid sexist stuff, and don't always respond to it in the ideal way. Is that not understandable?

I guess I can add not being gracious enough in the face of sexism to the list of all the things I get wrong as a woman.

The original post was the only post I read aside from Kortie's and the original post was the post I was replying to. Perhaps the OP should edit it to update his views.