Does my profile picture make me look Autistic?

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The (perhaps unfortunate) premise behind ABA.....is to force autistic folks to discern input beyond themselves.

I’m sure you, Blooie, have read about something called “floor time,” and perhaps have practiced it. It’s sort of a way softer version of ABA.

I think it depends in the therapist and how they approach it. Thankfully we have a great one without whom he never drank water. He kisses and hugs her and is very excited to begin when she comes. She transformed him to where he can focus on things. I saw how she did it. It was exactly the type of structure I craved in certain settings and it gives him confidence.

I agree with what you say.

Actually she said the way thé system for ABA (as a career) is set up is very flawed and the way they can misuse data or accidentally cause trauma by being dehumanizing without realizibg because they overrule emotions for protocol is a true concern

I know your family put in the work for you and so likely you got therapy of that kind? If so you could write about what benefited you or what stood out as harmful/dehumanizing for therapists and parents to read. A book or an article

They didn’t have ABA when I was young. Back in the 1960s.

My mother did a sort of rough ABA on me. She forced me to focus using aversive methods. I believe she slapped me and hit me sometimes to force me to focus. Or yelled at me. That’s my memory of it. I also had conventional speech therapy and play therapy. Not too far, in general, from what occurred in a book called “Dibs, In Search of Self,” though it wasn’t as intense, and I wasn’t as gifted as Dibs.

I remember being in a sort of solipsistic state when I was a toddler in a stroller.

My mom did that too. Being hit to focus is my main memory of learning. What is play therapy?

Never mind dont reply i can google these things.

Play therapy has a simple premise: to make therapy seem like play, rather than “therapy.”

Sort of like putting baby aspirin in a bottle of fruit juice, so the baby doesn’t know he/she is taking the medicine.

Though she is in my doctors surgery, it is the first time and the only time so far, that I have seen that doctor. From what ofters say she is always straight to the point and when I described her and gave descriptions of her to someone, they said that it is possible that she may be autistic and not know it.
I am just greatful that she put me forward to be on the list and that the autism team accepted me on the little they have to go on.
If it wasn't for me taking my Mum in with me, I would not have been put forward to be assessed, because for two years I had tried to ask and failed (Other doctors... But I did not oreviously go in solely to ask to be assessed. I went in for other reasons and was hoping to ask while I was there).
I was soo annoyed with myself through clamming up over two years of trying, that I took my Mum in. My Mum did not think I was on the spectrum, but she did speak up when I clammed up. (I don't normally bring my Mum in with me, but I am soo glad I did).
I have to talk around the point I need to make as if I see a doctor and try to come straight to the point I clam up. I have to reverse my mind and talk round the obsticle so I trick my mind and reach the point I want to make from a round about angle of approach if that makes sense?
So when I saw the doctor and started talking, I first started to say I had prosopragnosia and she said "So?" (As if it is not a problem in itself!) which nearly made me clam up, but I was able to carry on and then I described the symptoms of a shutdown and then asked if it could be a meltdown... And then I asked if I could have aspergers and she said "Symptoms?"
Then I clammed up. These one word straight to the point questions are not good for me as they make me need to suddenly reply without giving my mind a chance to think!
It was a good job my mother was there as when I clammed up she took over and said how I was not able to work or keep a job.
After my Mum said that I was able to talk again.
I don't kniw why I clam up. It is what I call mind blank when I can't think of anything. Nothing! Mind just stops! And I only seem to get it when I visit doctors or other official places. And I get it when I need to talk about myself to an official person and I am nurvous.
And when I get mind blank, the only way to free the "Blockage" is to turn 90 degrees and speak about an entirely different subject, and my mind frees up again, and then I can slowly bring my talk back round to get to the origional subject from a non-direct angle of approach. (Does anyone else get this?)
As I have had a lifetime of doing this, most people don't notice and it seems a seamless but indirect conversation, as I am soo used to quickly going off at angles to avoid a clammed up mind that even I don't notice until I am like I am now and analysing things.
I am a funny person! Haha!
But it does make me think of one of the old computers which can run a game or another program until it reaced a certain point and hits a fault and stops. It is like that happens in my mind.

In need be, please skip the first three paragraphs and read the one "So generally...".

Perhaps that is one extreme of ASD. What of the other? So perhaps there is the autist that can't discern outside input (you?) and perhaps the autist that can't discern themselves from outside input (me?). I am overwhelmed by outside input, including human, I see many connections, with me with others, with circumstances --- yet, the person says they just came over for a stick of butter. But their clothes, their gait, their tone... there is soooooooooooo much more. I want to know how they REALLY are, but they say they just need butter, really, it's all fine. And I know there is depth and I don't know how to behave b/c I have been taught to mind my own business. But all of me wants to connect that other part of self that is outside myself, but doesn't know myself.

Do these examples support your theory or not:

Caretakers of my ASD-like daughter have always says said she sees everything but is unresponsive. When she does take action it's unexpected --- a child fell and twisted her ankle --- by NT son went over to sympathize (or watch). My ASD-like daughter ran the other way... to alert the child's mom. "Cold" and "detached" but engaged. In some ways more helpful. I was dumbfounded that she had tracked the relationships (connections) of the partygoers and even knew who the child's mother was --- my seemingly "detached" ASD child "saved" they day - in her way.

And my non-verbal child ASD friend --- who goes around touching and pulling and exploring... when she looks at me... I see her, and she sees me. Perhaps the connection is imagination on my part - but I think not. She knows I see her for who she is - a way that others do not as they dismiss her (and her "weirdness"). But I celebrate her desire, her need to discover ---- to experiment with the outer world ---- to see all the possibilities and want to know which one will manifest.

So generally an NT will look at the top 3 possibilities and act accordingly (a crayon box has crayons and everyone knows that), but some ASDs are open to all the possibilities (a crayon box could have band aids and another person could know that). Not b/c they don't understand but b/c they are not presumptuous.

(And it's far more comfortable for me to explore these ideas then go deal with the craziness of what is the world right now.)

The second example describes an “Aspie” well. “Engaged, but detached.” Tony Attwood describes people with Asperger’s as being (to paraphrase) not averse, even willing, to engage in social intercourse—but awkward in doing so. This has happened to me frequently.

The first example seems an example of the “intense world theory,” in that autistic people are overwhelmed by the outside input around them, combined with the input within themselves. This feeling of being overwhelmed causes them either to not react at all, or to react in an awkward manner. Both have happened to me at different points in my life.

The third example is rather similar to the second example....except this highlights that most even severely autistic folks aren’t the “ultimate” autistic—amid their apparent solipsism, some outside influence does “penetrate” them.

Your daughter sounds cool! It sounds like a very well-cared-for grasshopper. They vary a lot in terms of life span. Some can be surprisingly long-lived though. If your daughter likes going on insect safaris (and if you live in the USA), I highly recommend the clickable image guide: https://bugguide.net/node/view/3/bgpage.

Duly noted! TY!

TY for your kind reply. I admit I was a bit scared. Teasing, rhetorical: Isn't there something about ASD folks and conflict?

And example #3 is my B&W thinking perhaps: I see that little bit of connection in my child friend and think "It's THERE"! (which makes it 100% so - because something is or isn't )

I was very bothered about the Theory of Mind tests that say the NT idea that a crayon box has crayons and everybody knows that is the "correct" answer. And that an ASD child thinking that perhaps a person already knows what the have just learned is the "wrong" answer. Heck, this is the way I live --- thinking everyone knows more than me or else can immediately understand and unable to explain. That's "false belief"? Apparently. I still say the "correct" answer is presumptuous and limiting.

I don’t feel ASD folks are especially susceptible to conflict.

Conflict usually arises because of ASD folks’ non-adherence to social norms.

I know I can’t stand conflict.