bad toughts

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Being the family scape goat is difficult to ignore. Some people believe they can handle it.
My brother-in-law toughed it out. Now he's a 40-year-old heroine addict with no real life.

Personally, I can't just shut up and take it. The stress of being treated like a dog gives me migraines and other symptoms that resemble a mini-stroke, so that I truly can't function.
You can call them psychosomatic all you like. I call it, "can't figure out how to get a glass of water."
I didn't need medicine or coping strategies that would allow it to continue. I needed to get out.

If it's bad enough that you want to run away, it's bad enough to admit that it is abuse.

Imagine how you would feel if you had a younger sibling, and how you would want to protect him.
Now, turn that anger around and feel it for your own sake. Be your own champion.

"Because Of You" (I am afraid) http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iLi0yBmPe0k&NR=1
See lyrics -- http://www.lyricsmode.com/lyrics/k/kell ... f_you.html

wow
I lose my way
And it's not too long before you point it out
I cannot cry
Because I know that's weakness in your eyes
I'm forced to fake
A smile, a laugh everyday of my life
My heart can't possibly break
When it wasn't even whole to start with

i remember when i tryd to win my stefdad's respect but he never really cared much
this song is very inspiring (the music is good itself to)
(the wierd thing is now suddenly my real dad is became a very nice and good guy he probbely realised how he whas acting back then)

I suppose people can change. I've never done a scientific survey.
Would it work to live with your real father?

Scapegoating - An Insidious Family Pattern of Blame and Shame on One Family Member
http://www.byregion.net/articles-healer ... ating.html

I Am My Family's Scapegoat.
http://www.experienceproject.com/uw.php?e=28947

for many reasons i cant really its not like my familie completely ignores him he gets visit once in a while + he would call my mother and tell her how bad she is+how the hell am i supposed to tell him everything and ofc the most important reason hes still in the area i need to get far away im sad belgium is such a small country its not like i whanted it to be thats why holland feels the best solution
i mean its not like im not in deep trouble already
*btw have you (with the chat thing) already try'd Lightweight Client?

Have you read those scapegoating links? If you google "scapegoating," you'll get a ton of stuff.

I still can't figure out how to use that WrontPlanet chat thing.

I downloaded msn messenger and it says I'm logged in, but I don't see how to use it.
I don't see anything about a "Lightweight Client."

The only thing I've ever managed to actually use is yahoo messenger.

Lightweight Client is for the WP chat anyway i downloaded yahoo messenger but whats your
yahoo messenger (i assumed it might the same as the one youv told me but only inplace of hotmail.com its yahoo.com?)
ill look it up in a sec
the first link whas to long so i just readed a part of it but the second one i finishd reading and i see a slight comparence

Just testing the system.

testing system?
no one here who might know how to change identitie of country?

I don't know what you mean.

how im supposed to change my identity of country?(so i can legaly live in holland)

I can't imagine a way for a 15-year-old to do that.

i know probbely need to find how to do that and im settled to go

If they are so abusive that you want to run away, they are way, way past abusive enough to report. You need practical assistance, a place to live, medical coverage, a way to finish school. You also need the psychological benefits of putting the blame where it belongs. You did not deserve the abuse, and by protecting them you are hurting yourself.

Just tell the truth. Did you try to write that letter yet?

im way to sensitive for that i mean im only sensitive in the way of other peoples feelings really,anyway got more important things to look out for
really got enought emotional problems on my head now

What "more important things?" The situation is contributing to, or is the cause of, the emotional problems. Psychological abuse, a place to live, medical coverage, finishing school -- what else is there?

Write that letter, just to get it clear in your own mind. The decision to give it to someone comes way later. Address it to the tooth fairy if you like, but get it straight and honest.