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Truly unable to connect

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ManErg
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24 Feb 2009, 6:58 am

mechanima wrote:
ManErg wrote:
equinn wrote:
Have a glass of wine and join in. Don't think so much about it for goodness sakes.


Exactly what the people in power say when they want the masses to join in with their evil plans.


In fairness, they don't usually mention the wine...


<sarcasm> But then they don't have to...all 'right minded citizens' know intuitively that mind-expanding substances are bad and destructive, but alcohol is compulsory to becoming a good member of the herd. </sarcasm>


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mechanima
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24 Feb 2009, 10:20 am

Actually, I got a bit sidetracked there by the thought of another "Aspie Dancer" and a boy, at that...(not to mention the sleeping pills, I sometimes have to take, to keep my hours half human, catching up with me and passing me out)...

A lot of people just don't realise that you can't "just relax and have fun", at will, unless you are predisposed to enjoy the specific "fun activity" anyway...I don't think anyone can...imagine an NT expected to "relax and have fun" with nothing but the average Aspie "special interest"??

Somehow, I doubt if a couple of bottles of wine would fix that so everybody was having fun! :D

In interactive terms, as an useful instruction, "just relax and have fun" seems to be right along there with "just relax and be yourself...

...and trust me, you really, REALLY, don't want me to do THAT...ever...

:oops:

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ooOoOoOAnaOoOoOoo
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24 Feb 2009, 11:14 am

This kind of thing happens to me a lot. One time I went to a festival where everyone was holding hands and connected together and running around like this long snake and I joined that and it was a lot of fun. To me it was like being connected but not being connected because I didn't have to talk or anything, all I had to do was hold the hands of the persons in front and in back and run when they did.
There have been times that have been extremely difficult for me and I feel dread thinking about them even now. It was when the teachers at school would force everyone to be in groups and this happened in college, even. When this happened I would sit there and not say anything or participate. Whenever I got bullied in school it was in these groups it wasn't as bad when we were all allowed to do work seperately.



marshall
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24 Feb 2009, 12:53 pm

Hovis wrote:
Greentea wrote:
Hovis wrote:
When people say, "Oh, you never have any fun!" what they mean is that you never do anything that they perceive as fun.


Actually, what they mean is that you never do anything that society dictates as "having fun". Because it's not fun for them either; they do it because society dictates it. If it was truly fun for them, they would understand that each and their own way of having fun.


Also true.

It seems to me sometimes that people actually have quite a lot of trouble distinguishing between what they actually want, and what peers/the media/society in general tells them they should want. The indoctrination is so complete that they truly believe the desire originates purely independently from themselves. Likewise, a genuine impulse that might be deemed not socially acceptable or at odds with the image they want to present to their peers is often stamped on at such an early point that they barely become consciously aware of it.


:lol: OMG. That's one of those things that's so true, yet you confront anyone with it they will likely deny it.



Greentea
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25 Feb 2009, 1:04 am

I strongly dislike social touch. I remember back when, as always looking for like-minds, I tried the NewAge activities and events...all that hugging and holding hands with strangers you'd never see again would make me wanna puke. Mostly because it's all so phoney. I remember one workshop leader who would hug each participant, a tight-tight hug, when they arrived and when they left. Then if you had announced during the meeting that you had decided not to participate anymore, you wouldn't get a hug at the end of the meeting. :lmao:


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invisiblem0nsters
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25 Feb 2009, 1:12 am

Greentea wrote:
Mostly because it's all so phoney.

When anyone says that it always reminds me of Catcher in the Rye. :lol:
I agree with what you're saying.


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pluto
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25 Feb 2009, 2:32 am

On social occasions I have the same difficulty connecting with everyone when they start
dancing and singing.The strange thing is when I'm at work I can often be spontaneous and connect with amusing comments and anecdotes.It's different in siituations where mass participation is almost seen as compulsory,regardless of how the individual is feeling at the time


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