Are you just going to let your symptoms beat you?

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I don't let it beat me. One of my problems is going into supermarkets, but to live I need to eat so I need to go into them. And I love music and even though I had a meltdown at a festival I'll still go back to the festival next year.

I checked this thread at lunch via cell phone (I have a mobile Email app that tells me when I get new messages). I have spent most of the afternoon trying to figure out exactly how to respond to some of the posts in this thread.

I will do so now, and I will also say this will be my last post on this thread. If anyone wants to take anything up, please feel free to PM me.

When it gets too loud for me, I go into another room to think. Or just ask them to keep the noise down because you're trying to concentrate (I was about to this to somebody during a gaming session last night, but another player did it for me - they were annoyed too.) Get some earplugs if necessary. If anyone gives you crap, let them know - in no uncertain terms - you are particularly vulnerable to sensory overload (far more vulnerable than I apparently).



Not everyone has to take the same number of steps unfortunately. If they did, the world would likely be a better place in my opinion, because I can think of plenty of snotty little rich kids who could learn a thing or two from walking in an average-to-poor man's shoes.

The steps related to your condition can and should be documented - by you first if necessary. I admit I am very new to the WrongPlanet community, and I am not by any stretch a guru on autism. Every time I come here, I see and learn something new about it - to include forms of Aspie-ness far different from mine.

But I also know I have seen people going through much of the same crap I've been through, and I want to provide some insight in light of my own experiences where I can. This is not only from a self-development perspective (gaining a better understanding of my own condition), but I also believe "what goes around comes around" (this is where faith comes in.) So if I can help somebody else, I will be helping myself - in more ways than one.

This also translates to goal setting and completion: some of your goals may well be in line with those of others. If you scratch their back, they may scratch yours.



Obtaining accommondation for your condition is a goal - and a worthy one at that. I suspect there is more evidence than any one person on this site can compile. Granted, some of those resources are going to be more relevant and/or accurate than others. No one knows your own condition better than you do - take note of those in some way, shape, or form. You could perhaps use that to your advantage in your research and evidence gathering to submit to parties that require them.

Anemone, here is a serious offer: if you want help in evidence-gathering, I will offer my help where I can. A lot of it will likely be through internet research, but there is a branch of my city-county library system by my house - they should be able to get some resources as well.

Another thought that has stuck in my head: could you do something from your house to supplement your income to supplement your welfare without losing it?



I did see something all right. I saw you pissing on something I take very seriously. This hurt like hell when I read it. This "big joke" as you put it is part of the reason I decided not to kill myself. The first part of my last post was certainly NOT a joke!

I know I see my Bachelor's Degree, my transcript with a 3.92 GPA, and a Mustang sitting in my driveway. Seeing as how I made this list of goals in June of 2006 (when I went back to college after 10 years of being out), that means I've accomplished two of my three educational and one of my three personal goals in just under three years. Some of the others will take more time than I originally thought they would, but that doesn't mean I'm going to stop working towards them.



I don't consider myself blessed, per se. I do know I got sick and tired of being invisible, though. And I'm trying to do something about it.



Good for you, props to those who understand and are willing to work with you, and good luck on the documentary!



Do you and/or your sister have documentation of this?! If you do, take this as high up the "chain of command" as you need to until something DOES get done about it!



I can relate to this....I had to do this at the front of the class at least once every five weeks for two and a half years. And when 25-30% of your grade was dependent on those presentations, you learned how to deal with it pretty damned quick with it.
If I had to pick one thing that has helped me the most in dealing with others, that would be it.



I'd tell that WP person myself - they'd probably be grateful for it. If you don't feel comfortable posting your thanks in this thread, PM him or her. And don't beat yourself up too hard over it. Take a step back, look at what went wrong and what went right, and take note of it.



There is truth to body language. Try practicing facial and/or body expressions in a mirror. Granted away from the mirror you will likely need to put some conscious thought into it, but it helps. I actually put thought into things like smiling now, and I have seen a difference.

Is this particular training repeated on a regular basis? If so, perhaps write the coordinators with your concerns about AS not being discussed. It could have been a honest oversight on their part, and maybe hearing from an individual with AS will give them "food for thought". Time will tell if they digest it or not.



Back when I still trying to be a part of the whole bar scene, I realized I was vastly friggin' different, too. The only way I remotely fit in was when I was wasted. My decision to leave that scene was financial (taking a pay cut without cutting back on my lifestyle), and to a lesser extent moral (because I am still a bit traditional when it comes to sexual relations - an unpopular view in that environment)

So once things started to straighten themselves out financially, I changed up my social associates to those with whom I knew I would share one of my special interests - gaming. I have also decided to go dry, so I have no reason to go back to "the scene". I am not nearly as "wound-up" now.

And you are right..while we can reduce the negative impact of our condition on our lives, it can never be truly eliminated. Doesn't mean we can't think of "workarounds".



Zeichner, I think in today's economy, you have probably hit the nail right on the fricking head! With jobs getting slashed right and left, experienced people are looking for jobs. This puts a new graduate looking to make a career change - such as myself - at a nearly crippling disadvantage if trying to enter CorporateLand (especially when you are attempting to make that change in your 30's like I am.) "Taking the road less traveled" may be the best bet. As in the end, I'm not wanting to work for someone else - I want to work for myself.



This is true, I think for all of us.



Get out of my head! You keep poking around in my thoughts, you may be scared by what you see...! While we Aspies do have our weaknesses - some of which may be unique to us - we also have many strengths that we can bring to bear that are sometimes overlooked.

Conclusion:
Like I said (way back up this post) I do not intend to post on this thread again - hence the length (wanted to say everything I needed to say now) If anyone wants to discuss any of this with me - at any time - feel free to PM me.

Until then, I hope somebody can take away something from this to make a change for the better - I really do. It's part of why I became a member of WrongPlanet in the first place.

Thank You

Ambereyes,

As of now, it's a neurological disorder that most neurologists want nothing to do with [unless there's a seizure disorder present], so they hand it off to psychologists and psychiatrists, who are better at recognizing it and treating comorbid mental illnesses if there are any (depression, anxiety and etcetera).

Neurologists don't care for it because there's no treatment, and they aren't trained in the treatment of mental illnesses (the aforementioned anxiety and depression). Enter psychology.

Of note, most cases of Asperger's/Autism are as easy to recognize as Multiple Sclerosis is, and the latter can be picked up via brain imaging by looking at lesions in the CNS. The behavioural manifestations of ASDs are very obvious if you are trained in recognizing them; it's just as obvious as looking at the white spots on an MRI.

Of course, certain cases of both Multiple Sclerosis and ASDs are hard to diagnose, but they're in the minority.

Yeah. You can beat your brains out and not "win." You can push to your true absolute limits, and "lose." People can push to their limits because if they don't, they'll die, and lose. The ubiquitous notion that the earnest and hard-working are always rewarded, and that only the lazy and the wicked are punished is absolutely a fairy tale. If the world were so simple no one would get sick or be hungry or cold or die or many other things that are common in the world.

The try-hard-with-brute-force is another fairy tale -- you have to manage things more intelligently than that. If you don't you can burn out, get sick, lose gifts, get traumatized, and run out of money surprisingly rapidly (been there, done all that). And the world doesn't slow down when such things happen; it will still demand what it does, regardless.



I was reading some article about the 7-Up (film) series once. There was a comment that the kids who were born into rich families, when they grew up, just could or would not admit that their socio-economic good luck had anything to do with their success -- that from their POV their sucess was solely due to their hard work, and that if anybody else didn't do as well, that was was solely due to their lack of hard work.

Just picking up social cues as quickly and easily as other people (when I was distracted from looking at the face).

Working in large teams, contributing effectively to group discussions where expected.
These tasks are challenging you could say because I'm subconsciously "distracted" by the physical environment at the expense of socialising.

Enjoying and effectively participating in large parties/conferences/information fairs.

People thinking I was weird hence prompting:
"Your daughter needs an assessment.
Have you noticed anything wrong with your daughter?"

You're right though, these traits aren't negative in themselves, people just had negative interpretations of these traits because in their eyes these traits prevented me from "socialising normally" ie. in the "expected" way. I wouldn't say that this way of socialising was wrong, just different.

I've found these observation skills incredibly useful in areas such as science, physical geography, poetry and IT. These subjects all require the observation, construction and analysis of details in the physical environment.

Yeah, I think people are being slightly unfair to say its not normal. Some people might not even recognise it. When you're in that situation, you have to stay in manual I guess. Where you're thinking all the time about where to look and how long for.

I work in a school right next to the kids and having to interact with all those adult teachers for 8 hours each day.

I'd say that's as good as I can do right now.

I can't do a lot of course. Can't read body language, struggle with words and talking, run on 150% when I supervise a kid while I'm doing something I actually cannot do, I have trouble with TOM, I can't diplomatically (due to wrong body language and tone of voice and being socially impaired) converse with others...

And boy, do I wonder about how miserable I actually do compared to a non-autistic soon-to-be 21-year-old and how I won't improve ever because I'm autistic and nothing will change that.

Yeah, but I'm absolutely special anyway so I manage to work in that environment that demands more than 150% of me every day.

Good thing I have super human powers and energy resources.

My madness is a form of unbreakable optimism.

Technical point: I did not mean the kind of noise you can shut out with ear plugs. I meant the yadda yadda yadda and vibes they push on you till it's permanently recorded in your brain. Social programming noise, I guess.

I don't know how to explain the rest. Either people get it or they don't. (shrugs)

Let's do the rundown, shall we?

I'm pretty much the top guy in my position at my job.

I have a really hot girlfriend who loves me more than anything.

I own my own business.

I have some good friends.


Yeah, I think I'm beating my symptoms.

I can't say that I'm letting my symptoms beat me either, since I've worked with service occupations. Only problem is that I don't know whitch of my skills I want to work with.

here, all bullying stems from insecurity. the majority of people are brought up well, with a safe attitude towards others. the minority are "instinctively" driven towards doing "alpha" gestures towards whoever they percieve as the weakest. not weak, but weakEST.

its science. most bullies wouldt dare pick on the next weakest, in line, because its too risky.

knowing this, dont you think you got what you need?
those people who bullied you, cry like little girls when its night, and theyre in bed. now you know.

NOW you can forget about these guys, and look towards the public again. if THAT was what held you back...

FINALLY!! !! !! !!

I am new to this site, and I have been waiting for some topics focussed on positive encouragement!! When I signed up I was hoping to find a support community based on people trying to find ways to overcome things that were holding them back from getting what they wanted in live.

In my opinion what people with Asperger's symptoms need is SPECIFIC ADVICE on how other people have been sucessful at coping with or overcoming their symptoms. Very specific, kind of like the stuff Anthony Robbins teaches.

No offense, but it seems to me, as a new person, that most of what I've seen is just posts of people describing their symptoms. that's all well and good, but where are the solution?

Where is the spirit of encouragement amoung all these members?

We can do this, whatever our particular goals are in life, we can achieve them. We don't have to be limited by these symptoms.

All we need is 2 things

1. A method. We need to be willing to try specific ideas or patterns of behavior to overcome whatever holds us back. It is not enough to just grit our teeth and insist our brains function in a different way.

2. Will power. If our technique we tried did not work. DON't GIVE UP!! ! just ry something else. Failure is a natural part of the road to success.

Thank you so much for starting this post! I want to try and create some positive energy here! (like I said, I'm new, maybe I just haven't noticed it yet)

I feel a support community could be very useful to me and my struggle for success. I hoped to find that here at wrong planet. What I can not abide is a group devoted to people soley explaining their problems. The discussion is fine, but I want to discuss SOLUTIONS as well!

I feel that what you said is missing the point. it is not about gritting your teeth and expecting to win. it is about picking yourself up when you fail and TRYING AGAIN.

And it is not about throwing brute force at a problem, it is about a willingness to TRY NEW THINGS. Keep trying one solution after another until you get something that works.

And if it does turn out there is something you absolutely cannot change (such as the way NT people act) just accept it and move on. Do not become angry about it, do not let it distract you from pursuing what you want out of life.

To me that is the point.

Yeah thanks There does seem to be too much negativity on this site. I'm sure if we worked together as one big group we could all have more success.

that's so true - strategy and will. i'd like to add that sometimes good support is needed too. but if there's no help - you can find a source of inspiration that will help you to keep on living through all the troubles. and you HAVE to throw away your depression and bad mood and don't let yourself become too anxious or sad when it's possible. then it's much easier to look face-to-face at your problems.
path from one point to another is rarely one big jump - it's a long line of steps. and if for someone it's mostly an easy walk (or ride?), then for us it's a hard road through deep jungle over rivers and mountains. well, i don't know about everyone but for me it's like that