"Aspergers" - Should the name be changed?

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Because silence can mean they hate you. If you are subject to how others see you and those others are also people with complex, sometimes clashing emotions and thoughts about the world and the people in it like you, silence can be good, can be bad and sometimes it's not entirely clear because a person hasn't made up their mind or displays non-verbal signals that they're distressed without willing to explain (verbally) what made them feel like this. And then people start to wonder if it may be them that cause the other to be uncomfortable.

I just wanted to say thank you all for understanding my situation with my program. Also, I have a ton of quirks myself. Even though it is not violence, trust me I have appropriately put up with the whole mistreatment thing, but because I am afraid of confrontations and always having to please people, I never have the guts to do anything,never mind I would never anyway. That is why while being in the program, always "shut down" and my depression and anxiety have gotten worse, even worse than when I was at my parents house. Not an actually anxiety or depression disorder, but symptoms of them because of being controlled by both my parents and the program, who talked and thought down to me. They think because I have a "label" that I am stupid and need their "controlling" ways, when it is the opposite, I need to be away from them and be on my own, since I was 18-20. I went to the doctor and told him everything, and even my mom admitted fault on her part and also, finally told the psych medication doctor that the agency was too controlling, mistreated me and tried to keep me in their program for ever. Ironically, my mom and i agreed that I was only supposed to be in their for only a couple of years, should have been out by 2004, but the agency did not want to "lose" clients because they would have lost money. So the agency "upped the Ante" with the controlling and talked me down into thinking I was more "needy" for them and even tried to get added Diagnosis's to my case, so that I could be even more heavily medicated so i could not think for myself. They were "supposed" to guide me into being independent so i can leave the agency within 2 years, that is what they told my mother. They lied and even told me a couple of years ago when i complained and they told me that they do not tech people into leaving the agency, and that people are in the agency lifelong. Every time they talked to my mom, they would tell her I was so independent that they were impressed, but when they talked to me they would tell me that I am too disabled to make it on my own and need their control forever(even though I never did). They would tell my mom things that she would want to hear and yet treat me the opposite of what they "promised" my mom. For many years my mom sided with them, until recently when she went over my house and found out they lied to her. She also found out because the group home nurse lied to all of my doctors telling them I was having problems with mental symptoms that I never had so they can keep me in the program. The doctor told my mom this and my mom told the doctor that the nurse told her the opposite that I was doing well and probably never needed medications. This made my mom angry and she no longer trusted this place. This was just recently(within the past 6 months). So we finally called the state and the state within the past month had told the agency to leave me alone and that I was to control my care independently, not the agency. Which means the I am 100% fully independent and the agency can no longer be involved. On top of that, a few months back I applied for my own section 8 apartment, plus school, but the agency has to allow me to live here, by law, until I get into an apartment. I am hoping that I get one soon. I am so desperate that I am finding ways to get me into one sooner, even if I have to say that I am in a horrid situation and need to leave ASAP.
****ALSO:IF YOU LOOK ON THIS EXACT FORUM, i HAVE AN UPDATE POST, WHICH WILL EXPLAIN A LOT MORE.

Thank you all for understanding me and my situation. I know that having Asperger's and/or Autism is a very hard life. That is why I hate these places. They are run by NT's who claim they care, but they have power hungry(and mean bossy) personalities that need to take out their evil controlling ways somehow. So they get a Psychology degree and create these places to "abuse" people like us. The thing is that if a person is low functioning they do understand what is going, but they are not able to communicate it. If a person is high functioning, can talk, but does not have the ability to express their needs then they too would have trouble. If someone like me who can both communicate and express me needs, ends up expressing my needs, I get in trouble. They way it goes is that the more able the person is able to get the "message" out, the harder the agency would be on someone. Unfortunately, with the other clients, because of their dual diagnosis of psychiatric disorders, they are confused and have trouble being able to express their needs correctly and act out in violence. Plus, with the agency being the way it is, the violence they express is a lot more extreme because of their situations being in that agency.Because of my fear of confrontation and I am not a violent person, I express my being upset by being depressed, having low self-esteem, low self-confidence,and I think that I am stupid because they think I am stupid. Just like the other clients at the program, I have my own issues with how I handle stress, but rather than a "meltdown", i have a "shut down". Trust me, with all of the thing that I have mentioned here to everyone about my "issues" which are more "baby" like than "angry" like, "shut down" versus "meltdown", I would never insult anyone in my program nor anywhere else. But due to my needing to hide things, I just do my shut down thing in private,because I would want to do it out in the open in front of these people to show them how they affected me, but then I know that they would keep me there lifelong and then I would be treated even worse. So I had to be careful and now I have to be more careful and I am even afraid, to this day to go to anyone with problems because I am afraid I will be stuck there again for ever. Unfortunately, the other clients can not hide their behaviors but that is because of their disability. In a way, i think they are very "brave" and I am somewhat jealous because they do not have the fears that I do. i know it sounds stupid, but with all of the Hell I had to go through, it would have at least mad me feel less defeated. But that would never happen, so I just have to "write" in words how I feel to them. If this agency is so smart, maybe the written words would be just as strong as the actions.

That is very well put. I can buy into the word "impairment."

I've read your link and it would seem our beliefs don't differ that much, it doesn't matter how disabled someone is, it's society that chooses wether they have a place in it or not. I just don't like aspergers or autism being presented as only positive traits, because it's neither accurate or fair to the people who struggle with the impairments it brings. It also belittles those who do struggle with the impairments by suggesting that they aren't trying or they do not wish to overcome their impairments.

I agree with that. It's something I've encountered before in some parts of the autistic community elsewhere that impairments were denied by autistic people themselves but also by others who try to make AS look like no problem compared to other forms of autism. It's horrible for those who do struggle - which, I think, is a majority that just isn't that outspoken or wants to be too, but struggles with being as public.

a rose called by any other name would smell as sweet.

Those cultures are not "disabled" because they facilitate the smooth conveyance and acquisition of important social information. Whether "I respect you" is conveyed by attentive but non-challenging eye contact, or polite eye-avoidance is not relevant, but that this message can be fluidly conveyed between people without anyone having to even talk is.

Would you argue that someone impaired in acquiring their native verbal language was experiencing difference rather than impairment?

Yes, maybe. But embarrassing silence may also occur in e.g. a family, where people don't hate each other (but maybe have another problem, little or big).

Maybe it's also because even though NTs are good at body language, it very seldom stands alone, but most often supply the verbal language? E.g. smalltalk is an important thing to NTs, even when the topic isn't important - there has to be some speech, especially when people don't know each other very well.

Last edited by AnnePande on 04 Jun 2009, 8:41 am, edited 1 time in total.

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I - C) a lack of spontaneous seeking to share enjoyment, interest or achievements with other people, (e.g.. by a lack of showing, bringing, or pointing out objects of interest to other people)"

I - D) lack of social or emotional reciprocity

II - C) stereotyped and repetitive motor mannerisms (e.g. hand or finger flapping or twisting, or complex whole-body movements)

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[enough symptoms for a diagnosis]

I am not sure if these 3 symptoms imply the absence of some type of ability: all can be considered simply a question of personal inclination. Or perhaps not: depend by what we mean by "lack of social or emotional reciprocity" (a peson that is simply extremly asocial match this symptom, or it requires more than that?).

That is a social disability in most cultures.

Seconding that you can't (theoretically and officially) have AS if you're not impaired according to the DSM-IV-TR.

It's in the criteria straight and literal:



This is further explained:



ICD-10 says that you 'just' got to fulfil about the same criteria as those with classical autism in the area of social interaction and repetitive behaviours.

No

Yes. The name Ass Burgers is disgusting. The name itself invites insults, degradation and bullying. Almost anything would be an improvement.

I agree: it's a good thing it's not, in fact, called Ass Burgers.

Asperger's is much better.

Remember that I was replying to Michjo, who wrote



(bold mine)

I.e., I was assuming that he was already ignoring the "criteria C" and talking only of the other criteria.

I heard it pronounced by my psychologist before ever having seen it spelled. The first thing that came to my mind when I heard it was:


I can't allow myself to purpetuate such an unfortunate name so, I tend to pronouce it "azzburjers". That also avoids laxative imagery.