'I am offended!'
Norny wrote:
cool you have something against me, how original
Actually I feel bad for you, because in a lot of your posts here you sound like you are very unhappy and at odds with yourself. You sound like a really angry, conflicted person. It comes out in the way you talk to other people, and it puts people off. You might think people are offended by your opinions, when it's not about that, it's just a really angry vibe and attitude coming from you that sets people on edge.
When you jump to say a thing like "have something against me" it sounds like you WANT people to take offense.
You do sometimes express your opinions in a hostile way...like I remember you saying something here about feeling like you want to hit people who self-diagnose with OCD.
OliveOilMom wrote:
Could their actions be a product of mental illness? I don't mean just depression and anxiety, which can cause someone to blow things out of proportion, but could it be from something else, and if so what could it be?
Paranoia might explain the ones who get upset at jokes that aren't about them.
Quote:
Eventually we won't even be able to fight a war because it's not nice to kill the enemy.
Well, as long as it happens in every warlike country at the same time, that could be quite good. Though I don't think the military does political correctness at all when it's not being watched. There was a bit of an argument a couple of years ago, when a British Army sergeant used the "n" word on a black recruit. One senior officer explained that when it comes to basic training, it's standard practice to be as offensive as humanly possible. Civilian life is very different.
dianthus wrote:
Norny wrote:
cool you have something against me, how original
Actually I feel bad for you, because in a lot of your posts here you sound like you are very unhappy and at odds with yourself. You sound like a really angry, conflicted person. It comes out in the way you talk to other people, and it puts people off. You might think people are offended by your opinions, when it's not about that, it's just a really angry vibe and attitude coming from you that sets people on edge.
When you jump to say a thing like "have something against me" it sounds like you WANT people to take offense.
I don't think a lot of my posts come across that way. TBH I feel really calm posting outside of heated threads, which are few and far between. I am curious as to whom you refer by 'people', I never considered myself to have pissed a select group of people off, at least outside of that one thread on self-diagnosis 6 months ago.
I find offense is often justified, but it is the specific type I refer to in the OP that I don't understand the need for. I rarely say things like what you have quoted, in fact, that's probably the first time I've directly stated something like that. I didn't want you to take offense, that was more of a troll comment, because your post was a blatant mockery.
Outside of a select few discussions I don't recall situations where I have been angry, and I don't understand why a lot of my posts would be interpreted in such a way.
Back when self-diagnosis was being discussed 6 months ago, I thought that some who supported self-diagnosis were far more hostile than those against it, but when I brought that up it was deflected back on to me being the a**hole.
dianthus wrote:
You do sometimes express your opinions in a hostile way...like I remember you saying something here about feeling like you want to hit people who self-diagnose with OCD.
I don't remember that but (unless drunk) I would only say something like that when referring to a specific context, for example 'I feel like hitting this person because they self-diagnosed OCD, even though they most definitely do not have it.'. I don't really consider that an opinion though, more of a reflection of one - that I hate when disorders are romanticized and trivialized.
_________________
Unapologetically, Norny.
-chronically drunk
kamiyu910 wrote:
Sometimes I have no idea who is going to be like that. This one person unfriended me because I commented on a picture she posted of something that vaguely resembled a swastika, it was a logo for some brand called Mine

I mentioned that many people still use the swastika for religious or other purposes that have nothing to do with the nazis, like the Finnish airforce, so it wasn't like it was evil that they used lines like that.
She replied with: "Okay then. Forget it. This post isn't funny or ironic at all because it ALMOST looks like a swastika and almost says mein. Later." I'm still confused...

I mentioned that many people still use the swastika for religious or other purposes that have nothing to do with the nazis, like the Finnish airforce, so it wasn't like it was evil that they used lines like that.
She replied with: "Okay then. Forget it. This post isn't funny or ironic at all because it ALMOST looks like a swastika and almost says mein. Later." I'm still confused...
I don't think she posted that because she was offended by it...or that she unfriended you because she was offended. She posted it because she thought it was funny that whoever designed that logo must not have thought about how it could be interpreted as Nazi symbolism. And it's ironic because you'd think that a company that wants to sell a product wouldn't promote its own product that way. The humor is in the perceived idiocy of someone putting this out there unintentionally without understanding what it looks like.
But instead of laughing at her joke, you took it seriously and tried to explain things to her as if SHE didn't understand what she was talking about, and thereby put yourself in the same category of what she was making the joke about.
Norny wrote:
btw, I don't lose arguments. I only win
My own view is that anybody who thinks they've "won" a heated argument on a support website such as WP has probably lost the plot. Of course it's not difficult to keep arguing aggressively until the other person loses interest and stops responding, but that's not really a victory. It might be a victory if the other person finally said "OK, I get it now, I'm wrong, you're right," or words to that effect, but I've not yet seen anybody do that in response to your arguments. So I don't see what you think you're winning. I don't think it's hearts and minds.
dianthus wrote:
kamiyu910 wrote:
Sometimes I have no idea who is going to be like that. This one person unfriended me because I commented on a picture she posted of something that vaguely resembled a swastika, it was a logo for some brand called Mine

I mentioned that many people still use the swastika for religious or other purposes that have nothing to do with the nazis, like the Finnish airforce, so it wasn't like it was evil that they used lines like that.
She replied with: "Okay then. Forget it. This post isn't funny or ironic at all because it ALMOST looks like a swastika and almost says mein. Later." I'm still confused...

I mentioned that many people still use the swastika for religious or other purposes that have nothing to do with the nazis, like the Finnish airforce, so it wasn't like it was evil that they used lines like that.
She replied with: "Okay then. Forget it. This post isn't funny or ironic at all because it ALMOST looks like a swastika and almost says mein. Later." I'm still confused...
I don't think she posted that because she was offended by it...or that she unfriended you because she was offended. She posted it because she thought it was funny that whoever designed that logo must not have thought about how it could be interpreted as Nazi symbolism. And it's ironic because you'd think that a company that wants to sell a product wouldn't promote its own product that way. The humor is in the perceived idiocy of someone putting this out there unintentionally without understanding what it looks like.
But instead of laughing at her joke, you took it seriously and tried to explain things to her as if SHE didn't understand what she was talking about, and thereby put yourself in the same category of what she was making the joke about.
It's hard to say with her, because she's an SJW and has gone crazy on other people who don't see things her way.
However, you are right that I commented when I shouldn't have, and only realized it after she unfriended me... I have a seriously bad habit of posting random facts. Though she was probably just looking for a reason to unfriend me due to our history and a former shared group... Incompatible personalities... For claiming to "get" me, and claiming to be a "friend", you'd think they'd at least try to tell me when I'm being an a** instead of dropping me like a hot potato... I like to know when I get things wrong (or when others think I have), otherwise I can never grow as a person. I have been trying to police myself a lot more, but it makes me depressed that I can't just comment on things because someone is bound to take it wrong, or I'm afraid I'll say the wrong thing.
One major reason escapism is my favorite thing.
Norny, I do get an angry feel when reading your posts, but I'm so used to my brother, it doesn't bother me. I'm also used to being told I seem angry when I'm not...
_________________
Your Aspie score: 171 of 200
Your Neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 40 of 200
ToughDiamond wrote:
Norny wrote:
btw, I don't lose arguments. I only win
My own view is that anybody who thinks they've "won" a heated argument on a support website such as WP has probably lost the plot. Of course it's not difficult to keep arguing aggressively until the other person loses interest and stops responding, but that's not really a victory. It might be a victory if the other person finally said "OK, I get it now, I'm wrong, you're right," or words to that effect, but I've not yet seen anybody do that in response to your arguments. So I don't see what you think you're winning. I don't think it's hearts and minds.
Nah, I just said that for the lolz, I didn't mean it seriously.
_________________
Unapologetically, Norny.
-chronically drunk
Norny wrote:
I find offense is often justified, but it is the specific type I refer to in the OP that I don't understand the need for.
I went back and reread your OP...well, here, I'll quote it for reference...
Norny wrote:
Being easily offended seems common these days, and especially on the internet. It seems increasingly enforced that others are expected to give a s**t. Pressure of being the 'bad guy' is placed upon those that hold opinions that do not baby the readers. And these opinions are not hostile, malicious, and do not tangibly limit lives like, for example, an opinion that literally strips homosexuals of reasonably equal rights.
I encounter such individuals often and it's so obnoxious - yeah, I'm totally an evil devil preying upon my internet victims. It's not that they disagree or express their rage where my opinion is concerned, but their consistent (sometimes subtle) appeals to some kind of twisted social justice that entitles them to unhurt feelings and a veneer of superiority through being moralistic/empathetic or whatever.
I find this behaviour incredibly passive aggressive and self-victimizing.
I created a poll for fun.
Opinions?
I encounter such individuals often and it's so obnoxious - yeah, I'm totally an evil devil preying upon my internet victims. It's not that they disagree or express their rage where my opinion is concerned, but their consistent (sometimes subtle) appeals to some kind of twisted social justice that entitles them to unhurt feelings and a veneer of superiority through being moralistic/empathetic or whatever.
I find this behaviour incredibly passive aggressive and self-victimizing.
I created a poll for fun.
Opinions?
If I hadn't had any past discussions with you here, I'd probably agree with you. I don't understand the need for it either.
But, remembering old threads I wonder if you interpreted them that way...I do remember one where you kept saying that other people were making you out to be "evil" and I didn't understand how you got that idea at all.
I also remember you getting really offended at the use of the word neurotypical on this forum, and calling for it to be banned.
From my perspective, I would have said that *you* tended to be easily offended.
ToughDiamond wrote:
Norny wrote:
btw, I don't lose arguments. I only win
My own view is that anybody who thinks they've "won" a heated argument on a support website such as WP has probably lost the plot. Of course it's not difficult to keep arguing aggressively until the other person loses interest and stops responding, but that's not really a victory. It might be a victory if the other person finally said "OK, I get it now, I'm wrong, you're right," or words to that effect, but I've not yet seen anybody do that in response to your arguments. So I don't see what you think you're winning. I don't think it's hearts and minds.
Very well said ToughDiamond. I was pondering that, at a complete loss for words.
dianthus wrote:
But, remembering old threads I wonder if you interpreted them that way...I do remember one where you kept saying that other people were making you out to be "evil" and I didn't understand how you got that idea at all.
I said that people were making out those against self-diagnosis to be 'evil'. People were reporting, name-calling, requesting oppression etc. Goes on and on. I said that a few times, and when somebody finally responded it was you, and it was quite an explosive reaction to say the least. You dismissed my point of view as 'just my interpretation of things' which I now find massively hypocritical.. considering your interpretation of my posts is that I am an angry/conflicted individual.
dianthus wrote:
I also remember you getting really offended at the use of the word neurotypical on this forum, and calling for it to be banned.
I had a feeling you'd bring that up, but you didn't read the OP, only the title. I wasn't calling for the word to be banned, I was suggesting that 'allistic' would be more suitable, and received a bunch of dismissive 1 line responses, including sarcastic comments (based purely on the title of the thread) and a person ranting about how people with AS had superior brains to NTs. Unless you were insincere afterwards we both apologized to each other and moved on from that.. or so I thought.
Back then I didn't know whether I qualified for a diagnosis of autism or not; I didn't consider myself NT. What pissed me off was the blasting/shaming of NTs as a group by a few individuals, though that was mostly outside the thread you refer to.
dianthus wrote:
From my perspective, I would have said that *you* tended to be easily offended.
I never said that there was anything wrong with offense. Not once. We all have our innate reactions to things. There is however a behaviour that appeals to a group mentality that I don't understand (as highlighted in the OP), and a misuse of words such as bullying.
I don't get what your point is. It seems like you are trying to personally attack me and nothing more. If not please clarify.
I've only been replying to your allegations.
_________________
Unapologetically, Norny.
-chronically drunk
dianthus wrote:
ToughDiamond wrote:
Norny wrote:
btw, I don't lose arguments. I only win
My own view is that anybody who thinks they've "won" a heated argument on a support website such as WP has probably lost the plot. Of course it's not difficult to keep arguing aggressively until the other person loses interest and stops responding, but that's not really a victory. It might be a victory if the other person finally said "OK, I get it now, I'm wrong, you're right," or words to that effect, but I've not yet seen anybody do that in response to your arguments. So I don't see what you think you're winning. I don't think it's hearts and minds.
Very well said ToughDiamond. I was pondering that, at a complete loss for words.
It's hard for me to understand why you took what I said there seriously considering your massive amount of social inferences elsewhere, especially considering the last thing I wrote in response was 'I lost your mum'.. lol.
_________________
Unapologetically, Norny.
-chronically drunk
dianthus wrote:
Norny wrote:
I don't get what your point is. It seems like you are trying to personally attack me and nothing more. If not please clarify. 
This IS my point...you take things as a personal attack.
Uh.. what?
You aren't saying anything relevant to the thread, just bringing up 1 or 2 things from the past and stating how I am an angry/conflicted/unhappy individual etc.
Are you claiming that I was wrong to state that I felt those against self-diagnosis were being regarded as evil? I was not taking that as a personal attack, but to me it was obvious that we (as a group) were considered evil. Multiple people were trying to stop anti-self diagnosis discussion entirely. There were reports flying, we were labelled 'uncaring'.
I feel that I've taken very, very few things on this website personally - IMO the only thing I truly took too personally was Olympiadis and his spreading of his NT hivemind theory. But I suppose you're entitled to your interpretation of things (
I suppose that my opinions can occasionally seem to have an angry vibe, even though I never intend for that to be the case.
It feels kinda ironic to me, that there are so many subtleties/vibes etc. floating around on an autism forum. I know that btbnnyr has experienced the same thing happening to her posts, when she has never had any malicious emotional intent behind her posts. IIRC she was somewhat raged at in the self-diagnosis thread 6 months ago.
_________________
Unapologetically, Norny.
-chronically drunk
dianthus wrote:
Norny wrote:
I don't get what your point is. It seems like you are trying to personally attack me and nothing more. If not please clarify. 
This IS my point...you take things as a personal attack.
I'm really confused, I've not seen Norny take things as a personal attack...
Maybe because Norny reminds me so much of my brother, who likes to joke the same way and it doesn't come across online the same as in person. Plus he's really good at "playing the straight man."
How about we just focus on the people who really are so sensitive to others and leave others alone? I think OOM brought up a good point on figuring out where the line is on getting offended, and where people should be given leeway or shrugged off. There have been people who have taken everything that didn't agree with them 100% as an attack even if it wasn't, they just perceived it as such because maybe they were depressed and anxious or they had something else going on. Our brains can seriously skew things sometimes.
_________________
Your Aspie score: 171 of 200
Your Neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 40 of 200
