Why are haircuts and shaving important to NTs?
Well IMO they want to look better perhaps there hair is graying or is getting too long and they want it cut don't worry as an Aspie I don't truly get it either LOL! Sure I need my haircut now (It's getting into my eyes) but am I freaking out needing it cut like an NT does NO! LOL! I find it stupid and frivilous!! !!
racooneyes
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This may sounds obvious but it's because the way you look is how people see you. You may be the most charming intelligent well read man in the room but if you look a tramp people will think you are a tramp.
This may not sound reasonable to you but when you take into account just how long it would actully take to find out what each individuals personality is like this is a very reasonable way of quickly measuring wether someone is a potential threat or not, once that calculation is out of the way and we've determined the person is not a threat we move on to wether this person is useful then we move onto wether they are attractive. This all happens in the blink of an eye without thinking. We all do it*.
Once we're past those automatic responses we might start thinking about how someone who is a mess on the outside is likely to be a mess on the inside. Do we want messy people in our lives?
If you're at school and a parent/teacher wants you to shave and get a haircut then this kind of pressure to indulge in standard personal grooming is, much like everything else in education, just a way of getting you used to it before entering the world of work. Training for the real world. Most jobs require that you look (and smell) presentable especially those dealing with the public, scaring them off is bad for business.
Sound rational to you?
If you're talking about why women spend many thousands per year on exactly the same hair as everyone else, sometimes other peoples actual hair, then that's beyond my ken (it's unknowable for heterosexual man) sorry
*possibly made up
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Last edited by racooneyes on 26 Sep 2009, 11:36 am, edited 1 time in total.
Shaving and haircuts (and other types of grooming) are important to both people with Autism and to Neurotypicals.
Crikes - even my four year old son (who is dx with Autism) has a basic amount of pride in his appearance! (although he definately doesn't like haircuts - it's more of a sensory issue).
Fixed
I do it because I do not like long hair. It makes it soooo hard to brush and cream rinse doesn't seem to help because I still get knots. When my hair it short, it makes it sooo much easier to brush and there is no knots and they are easy to get out and they don't hurt.
The reason why I shave is because my air is thick and course and I have to shave it or I look ugly with dark hair. I hate under arm hair and pubic hair. Gross. At least I don't shave my arms and upper legs and all. Mom told me to not do it because she has ugly hair on her upper legs and she said it was because she started o shave up there as a teen. Now she is stuck doing it. I heard it's a old wives tail that hair grows back thicker and longer but if that is no true, then why does the hair look coarse and dark when you keep shaving there when it grows back? The hair even feels coarse too where you shave when it's grown back.
Heck my ex aspie boyfriend shaved and it was because he hated body hair.
So this is not an NT thing
racooneyes
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Heck my ex aspie boyfriend shaved and it was because he hated body hair.
His whole body? Just shaving my face is painful enough.
I remebered another good reason for shaving. Stubble can get very painful for girls when you're kissing them especially if your stubble is thick. Mine is like a cheese grater but I got told a good tip, use conditioner on your face and the stubble gets softer.
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read all the pamphlets and watch the tapes!
get all confused and then mix up the dates.
For me there are 2 reasons.
1. the long hair starts to bother me, so I chop it off.
2. The manner in which I chop if off invites impromptu conversations from strangers.
It's like an experiment. In the first 2 weeks I get a hair cut, I can talk to help and people are generally friendly. From 2-4 weeks, they treat me with a sort of averageness(?) and I have to pull for attention. After that, people progressively avoid me. The societal images associated with unkempt grooming are hospitalized, sick, depressed, insane, homeless or otherwise ill people.
So purely from a grooming perspective, you appear the healthiest when you step out of the barber shop, and you look the most sickly entering the barber shop.
Times when one wants to appear healthy are perhaps at job interviews, parties, gatherings like weddings or perhaps funerals, concerts, or meeting new people in general. I figure that people who keep themselves well groomed are looking to socialize.
I haven't had my hair cut in almost 5 years :/
I'm trying to work up the courage though.
My appearance is important to me, I just get very overwhelmed when it comes to changing it. It also doesn't help that I have an extremely sensitive head and I don't want anyone touching it.
PlatedDrake
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For me, i have to shave otherwise my touch sensory goes out of control (growing beards itch like you wouldnt believe). I dont like getting my haircut done either, mainly due to the itching afterwards . . . however, it gives me a good reason to shower (showering is something i do enjoy). If anything, i find you have to find your own way to rationalize something you like when it comes to certain grooming procedures (my showering after a haircut for example).
As for rational reasoning, most people feel that keeping up this form of grooming helps keep one looking younger, and therefore more attractive to potential companions, etc.
poopylungstuffing
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My main partner, while arguably probably not NT, does not identify himself as being on the autistic spectrum...and he seldom bathes or shaves or brushes or cuts his hair....
His reason...too preoccupied with other things....So his hair is a big tangled mop all the time...that is his style..he likes it...ambitious females will come along and think they could fix it...and they fail.
Sometimes I will buy him hair brushes...which he loses...I argue that grownup adults need to brush their own hair..and find their own clothes...and clean up after themselves once in a while....
I don't like having to go through all the fuss of shaving my legs all the time, so I don't. My legs aren't really all that hairy anyway. Same goes for my armpits. Why would I have hair there if I am supposed to shave it. In my first LTR, my boyfriend made me shave..and would tease me about not doing it very well..I was really clumsy about it...it does not come naturally to me...He would pick on me if I got the slightest bit of armpit stubble...One day, I saw a girl at a concert who did not have shaved armpits, and I thought it was pretty, and decided that if it were ever up to me, I would not shave anything ever again...so when I broke up with my first LTR, I stopped shaving.
Sometimes I trim my armpit hair..but that's about it.
I don't like getting haircuts because I hate going to the hair stylist. I have been cutting it myself lately.
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Heck my ex aspie boyfriend shaved and it was because he hated body hair.
His whole body? Just shaving my face is painful enough.
I remebered another good reason for shaving. Stubble can get very painful for girls when you're kissing them especially if your stubble is thick. Mine is like a cheese grater but I got told a good tip, use conditioner on your face and the stubble gets softer.
Yes his whole body.
Haircuts and shaving are important to me, too. I don't like this idea that to be an Aspie one must be continuously rude to people because it's "Aspie honesty", and you must be very hairy all over your body and face, like a giant tarantula, and your hair has so many split ends you can't run a comb thru it after washing because getting a hair cut is not "Aspie".
So not true.
I am terribly clumsy, which doesn't go over well when I have a razor in my hand. Haha. I always have battle wounds when I get out of the bath. Unlike getting my hair cut, I do understand the importance of shaving, and am very bothered by having hair on my body. I have lots of unintentional self-inflicted scars to prove it! I absolutely loathe bathing, unless I'm at my house taking a bubble bath with my candles and my special playlist specifically for bath time. Then it is one of my favorite things ever.