10 things you want NTs to know

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Hello I am macking a brochure about autism to raise awareness I am inclueding a section called 10 things I as an autistic person want you to know. So now I need your help. I am calling on the autistic community. What are a few things you want us NTs to know?

Thanks for the help

Don't assume you know what I'm thinking by my body language... you don't. Check in with me before you go spreading malicious rumors.

Sounds like there's a story behind that one...

There's more about me that's like you than is different. Don't get hung up on the differences--but don't assume I'm exactly the same, either.

I like thatone and I have actually found that to be true. I have a friend with AS or PDD/NOS (not sure yet she is geting an exam soon) and he body language dosnt normaly match her feelings.

yeah people tend to fear anything that is even slightly diffrent from them. will deffinatly add this too

When I say something, it is meant to be taken literally. If I am vague on details, do not read into it, just ask me what you don't understand, because there are not underlying meanings behind what I say.

When you say something, please be patient if I do not respond how you expect, or need to ask more questions to know what you mean-I do not read into what others say and am trying to better understand what you mean.

When you ask me a question, remember I am not always going to automatically know that you are searching for a specific answer... make sure you REALLY want to know what I think and are willing to accept it, good or bad.

Please be respectful of hypersensitive senses. Noises that may sound normal to you may be painful to me, so if I ask you to turn down music or lower your voice it is for a good reason.

If I am boring or annoying you, please tell me directly - I may not be able to pick up on your nonverbal signals.

I have seen estimates that anywhere from 65 to 85% of the information in a conversation is relayed non-verbally... which I am unable to read. I am restricted to your words, so please SAY what you mean.

If I don't look at you while you are speaking, please don't assume I'm not listening. I may actually be restricting my visual input so that I can hear you even better. I am showing you respect by trying to really hear what you are saying.

If I don't look at you when I'm talking, it's because I need to concentrate on what I am saying and I'm easily distracted by visual detail. I am showing you respect by paying attention to what I am saying to you.

Before touching, please ask.
I might want 'warning,' or not to be touched at all.

It can be overwhelming, especially if unexpected.

I am not a snob. Or "aloof".

-Please keep out of my personal bubble! I am very uncomfortable with people I don't know getting too close to me, especially when you touch me unnecessarily. And no, it's not funny if I freak out over you touching me either, nor am I crazy or a "nutcase" for it either.

-Just because I am not making eye contact with you doesn't mean I'm not paying attention. If I'm responding to you, I am in fact listening.

-Your whistling and/or humming is bothersome and distracting to me. It's just one more thing adding to my sensory overload.

-Do not make teasing and/or condescending comments towards me. I view these as personal attacks, regardless of how harmless you think they might be.

These are all things that would happen on a regular basis at work before I finally quit that nightmare of a job. And yes, I actually have been laughed at and called names by older people for freaking out over personal space invasions.

Fixed



What I want them to know is do not expect me to see double meanings as you speak to me.

Just because I am giving you short answers does not mean I don't like you. If you want more detail, ask.

I do not need lot of hugging and touching to be loved

Please don't ask me any questions that require answers you don't want to hear. I don't like to lying.

Please don't expect me to read your mind. Don't assume I don't care about you.

Please don't assume I don't like you when I am not looking at you or not very talkative. I am just shy when I meet new people.

I have an information sheet written out to let other people know what is going on - I'm not going to post it here, as is is quite long, and I don't have it posted up anywhere else so I can't link to it. If anyone is interested, let me know, and I will put it up via Mediafire or similar. Those that have seen it seem to think it may be useful...

Lots of these apply to me but here's a couple more:

Please remember that I find it hard to understand exactly what's being said when several people are talking at once. So please don't be offended if I ask you to repeat what you said, because in all likelihood I didn't catch it the first time round. I'm not deaf, I just don't have the kind of mental filters most people have.

Also, the fact that I don't look you in the eye doesn't make me deceitful or shifty. If you persist in staring at me, I will feel intimidated and want to look at your face even less.

And, if you want me to stop talking, tell me. If you don't say anything, I'm likely to assume that silence means you're listening to me and go into a lengthy monologue on something that fascinates me but may well bore the pants off you.

Oh, one more thing: Realize that as an Aspie woman, I have less interest than many NT women in stereotypically 'feminine' topics of conversation, and that I don't like being coerced into 'girlie' activities. (This may not be true for all AS women, but I'd bet it is for a fair few of us, me included.)

OMG... it's sooooo true for me.
My idea of a good time is NOT shopping.

Agreed.