Describing Aspergers to NT's as plainly as possible

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I'm going to "come out" on a forum I've been on for years that I'm an Aspie but when I try to put it in print as plainly as possible it makes me sound like some sort of nutter. Does anyone have a brief description of Aspergers that gives the pros and cons of the syndrome without it making us sound like a cross between a nerd and a window licker.

Sorry for using "window licker" but I've never been too politicaly correct and it's the language I use with friends so I'm sticking with it.

Depends on what traits you suffer from the most - every Aspie has a different profile on the spectrum. Also on the context - if you're intending to socialise with the people concerned, you might do well to reveal your social difficulties....if you're intending to work for them, you might want to mention the more practical features such as multi-tasking.

I don't have any simple description of my impairments, and I don't often tell people that I have AS, for exactly this reason - it seems rather complicated and I find it hard to believe that many people out there would be interested or bright enough to really listen. When I've tried, people have shown little interest and they generally continue to behave as if I'd never said anything about it. At work for example, they've made adjustments but it's been more to do with simply cutting down the amount of work they give me, rather than tailoring the work to my condition. It achieves the desired result - with less on my plate I can more easily cope with the difficulties (the bad times don't last as long now), and I feel safer because they seem to appreciate that they'd be unwise to get impatient with me the way they used to, but they don't seem to really understand the condition.

In my case, a good place to start is my difficulty in switching from the detail of a task to the big picture. That tendency for my brain to stick to one thing at a time seems to explain a lot of the practical problems I have, as well as the social problems (because to cope well in a social situation it's often important to be able to quickly flip from one subject to another). But there's a lot more to my condition than that.

It's a motorcycle forum and I've met maybe 30 people from the forum. I've even been on biking holidays with some of them. They range from hospital porters up to multi millionare buisness men, one is even trained in psychology and I think all of them see me as a bit strange. I want to explain I have AS but then I would need to explain what AS is otherwise a lot of them will think "rainman" or tourettes or something similar. I just need a simple explanation of the good and bad sides to aspergers that I can post. They can then make their own minds up as to how I fit in the spectrum.

I'm looking forward to telling them realy as I'm interested in seeing how they change in the way they interact with me.

This probably shows where I am on the scale better than I could.

I've just noticed greenturtles stickie, perfect.

Thanks turtle.

I was just going to suggest Greenturtle's illustrated guide to Aspieism, FTM. I especially relate to "Do I know you? oh! Hi mom!"

Merle

For me, sensory sensitivity is one of the biggest issues, and explains why I dislike social interaction, physical contact, unexpected changes in routine, and so on. It's all simply "too much" and causes me to overheat. It's amazing how much more smoothly I function by quieting the stimuli in one mode; for example, wearing earplugs, listening to music in the background, wearing sunglasses, or very comfortable clothes. What has been frustrating for me is helping others to explain how the sensitivity isn't static; it seems to change depending on context -- for example, another person might think that being outside, in nature, on a quiet walk, is necessarily more "quiet" and less likely to cause overload than being in a crowded environment, but that isn't necessarily the case. Sometimes colors or sunlight are especially overwhelming, and certain smells and sounds seem more jarring than others. When it's night time, and there is complete darkness, my touch sensitivity seems to become amplified, and I have a lot of trouble dealing with any physical contact while in bed, if it isn't of a distinctly sexual nature. It's very hard to try to rationalize to a significant other who sees my fluctuations of sensitivity, as she observes I sometimes seem "so normal" but other times seem completely robotic.

I'll add a general point that maybe others can help me with both explaining to NTs and understanding for myself. My NT girlfriend expressed to me that dealing with me is terrible, because I am like no one else she has ever met...and I told her "imagine if that were the case with everyone you met, and you have some idea of what it is like for me." She said "But everyone else is the same compared to you, so you should at least be able to know what to expect." I had a lot of trouble explaining to her that isn't how it works...all NTs seem equally alien and incomprehensible, even though they may be more similar to one another than a single aspie or autistic person is compared to other NTs from the NT perspective. I tried to explain to my significant other that the nature of autism is that all others seem essentially separate from the self; it isn't a matter of whether or not you can predict their behavior per se...something very simple yet difficult to explain. I wonder what others' thoughts on here are about it.

As was put in another thread: "It's Autism *shrug*"

Logically what you said wasn't incorrect, but I suspect there was something more going on between the lines - I could be miles off target because I have a lot of trouble reading between lines, but my guess is that she began by expressing frustration at dealing with you, along with a mild insinuation of blame on your part, and she interpreted your reply as an invalidation of her frustration, and there followed an exchange of logical arguments as each of you defended their position. It might have gone better if she'd explained exactly what had happened in the moments leading up to her making that opening comment of exasperation, and if she'd owned her part in getting into that state....then you might have been able to explore coping strategies to help deal with the problem.

I think these slightly fraught types of conversation are quite common even between NTs.....the superficially logical discussion cloaks an emotional exchange. But like I say, I'm not good at reading between lines, being an Aspie, and even if I turned out to be right this time, it'd probably only be because I've had enough time to ponder the situation (which I don't get during real conversations of my own). Anyway I thought I'd best throw my idea in to see what you think.

What is a "window licker"?

To the main question: I tell NTs who do not know it that I have a hard time discerning their intentions unless they let me know quite explicitly. I also tell them that I am extremely literal minded and that I don't "read between the lines".

ruveyn

"...the derogatory British term "windowlicker", meaning a mentally handicapped person. The term is also a direct English translation of the French term faire du lèche-vitrine, meaning "window shopper" "

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Window_Licker

I alway thought the term referred to people who licked the windows on the buses...

I had to explain what autism is a few times.The definition i found to be the most simple is:

,,Look around you.Tell me what do you see?What do you hear?"
*person does that*

,,what you do not see or hear is the people there talking.You do not hear the cars on the street,and you did not see the (insert random detail object).I do.I see and hear everything.My brain doesn't filter it out.And as anyone would guess,it does not feel good".

Some pupils in Britain go to special schools and they get on a bus reserved for them, many on the bus will be mentally challenged but not all. These buses have become known as "window lickers buses" because some passengers do odd things like pulling faces and licking windows.

Nothing to do with the French window shopping.

Kind of off-thread question, but what is the "hunter" axis on the chart supposed to indicate?

That came up a while back - RDOS said that category was for research rather than being part of the diagnosis......something to do with the theory that AS is a Neanderthal throwback....I gather those questions relate to the different ways in which Neanderthals and Homo Sapiens used to hunt.