grooming

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curious about other aspie females in particular...My appearance is very feminine but I don't get 'gotten up' to the extent that most women do. I react to some aspects of typical feminine appearance as if they are manipulative, i.e. I feel I am being asked to manipulate if I were to present myself this way. It might be just one more example of how it seems there layers of truth that non-AS people don't detect, that I get hung up on, alot. I don't know... I wonder if anyone else ever thinks about this.

I've had phases of trying to change my presentation to be more in fitting with the norm, but it never really caught, so I went back to being me. I'm sort of somewhere in the middle. I'll wear ear studs/earrings occasionally, and go about half and half with boy and girl clothes. I never see the point in wearing impractical things, though. Heels, dangly earrings, makeup, 90% of dresses & skirts..

I do wear make up and stuff sometimes but it's mostly when I go out which is hardly ever but when I do this make up course I'll have to wear it every day. Other than that, I wear pretty casual stuff. I do keep religiously clean shaven though, everywhere. Most of my bathing time is taken up by shaving my whole body.

My pic shows the extent of what I do normally. If I do too much more, I hate the way it feels on my face, and I don't like not being able to recognize myself. I mean, /I/ know what I look like underneath it all, so how far do I really want to deviate from that concept?

The hair is a different story. Black hair (purple was temporary) just looks better with my skin tone than my natural color, anyway. When people saw it they were shocked for about ten seconds, but most people can't picture it being back the way it was.

ETA: At a minimum, I wear Bare Minerals to hide skin issues that I'll have forever (yay, genetics), and something to minimize how obviously messed up my eyebrows are (yay for minor trichotillomania). These are two things that just make me feel less awkward about my appearance.

Sometimes I use the 'warmth' color from Bare Minerals in there, too, as a kind of blush that really makes my eyes pop. Sometimes I wear eyeliner.

I really hate anything on my lips. I HATE mascara.

Bare Minerals feels/looks best to me. I hate oily make up.

I shower first thing in the morning, and put on deodorent. And I always comb my hair if I go out, and usually shave, too. That's about the extent of what a male is expected to do as far as appearance goes.

Last edited by WardenWolf on 22 Dec 2009, 8:36 pm, edited 1 time in total.

I shower everyday or every other day and I shave every time. I wear clean clothes and I don't wear clothes if they have at least one spot on them. I wear what I like and I don't keep up with fashion. But my clothes have to match and go together. I keep my hair brushed when I go out and I don't wear make up, too fake. I do this because it makes me comfortable, I don't like the icky feeling of being dirty. I don't like make up because I don't like how it feels and when I scratch, it gets on my hands and stuff. I've ended up washing it off at school dances. My mom or my cousin would put it on me and I let them taking it as a game we were playing. I played with make up growing up and used to make my face a clown face. My mom had a problem with it for some reaosn and yell at me about it. And it was my fake make up I was playing with.

So I am like a typical woman in some ways; the cleanness, the neatness, my clothes having to match or go together. I refuse to wear things that don't go so that's why I don't wear lot of my clothes I have. I also have eight pairs of shoes but I wear my sneakers a lot. I wore them out so now I am wearing my Sketcher shoes. I should buy new sneakers but I hate shopping for new clothes and shoes. Too stressful. My mom had always helped me in the past. Same as bra shopping. I am always wearing my black shoes I have had since I was 14 or my Sketchers. The rest I hardly wear or never do.

I used to wear earrings, I dunno why anymore. I still have the holes. I wore a pair on my wedding. However, I refused make up on my wedding and threw a fit about it and my mom said we didn't have to do it then since it's my wedding. I let them mess with my eye lashes and hair. I hated it but my mom pushed it on me. I tend to be soft.

I started to play dress up when I first turned 21 because I wanted men and to be a grown up. My mom got me adult clothes to make me look grown up than a teen and she told me the reason why I don't get men is because I dress up like a little girl and it makes me look younger so men think I'm young. So I decided I better started wearing grown up clothes. Now I am myself again. At home I still wore what I like but when i got out in public, I wanted to play dress up. Then when I met my last ex, I was myself. My first ex thought it was "ret*d" what I was doing because I wasn't being myself and the men would like the fake me and then not like the real me. I mean what would be the point of me playing dress up and the guy likes what I wear but the second time he doesn't like what I wear and bam he is gone. I have wasted my time with him. He had a point and he was right. I was irrational.
But I did play dress up for interviews, now that was different because people judge you based on your appearance. My aunt had to help me with that. I still didn't wear make up. To pass an interview, you have to play a game and play the game of dress up. Same as when you go looking for a job, you have to play dress up because they still judge you when you walk in and ask for an application I hear. So I played dress up everyday when I go job hunting.

I shower every day (if I'm not depressed,) use face lotion & deodorant. That's basically my grooming schedule.

haha! What's grooming?! It's been so long I hardly remember! lol

I pretty much shower and moisturize, (I tend towards dry skin) apply natural deodorant, and that's it. As for clothes, I wear what feels comfortable; I tend to like L.L Bean clothing and shoes. I like getting really dressed up on fancy occasions, but rarely. If it's really special, I will go so far as wearing earrings, a bracelet, a necklace, a bit of scent, and maybe lipstick and mascara. But that is really rare. I usually wear sweats, or cotton slacks, with a men's flannel shirt over a long sleeved knit shirt, if it's cold. Fabric has a lot to do with what I wear. I truly believe that make-up is not necessary in my case, but it does make me look prettier. I have been told that I am pretty without it. But I really hate it when I see pictures of celebrities without all their flash, and they look so very different, even awful!

I shower every day, wash my hair almost every day, brush my hair, and wear clean clothes. I don't wear makeup as I don't see a need for it. I have a perfectly adequate face.

As long as you don't smell you are okay.

Yeah. I wish I figured that one out when I was like. Anytime before 14.
I was definitely one of the Aspies that wasn't aware of grooming for quite some time.
Did a 180, though, because now I can't stand going more than a day without at least showering.

I wear makeup everyday, I'm almost phobic about going out without it, at least on my eyes, but that's because the girls taunted me about my trichotillomania when I was a teenager and I got so used to covering up for my lack of eye-hair that I feel naked without it.

I also discovered that people react much more positively towards me when I'm done up. It's harsh and unfair, but at least when you're female, being pretty makes up for a lot of quirkiness. It just smoothes out some of the bumps in the road.

There's also the general esthetic aspect. I like looking at pretty symmetrical things (and people) and I like being one. With people I accidentally stare at them if they're pretty so I have to remind myself to look away. I'm guessing they notice my ogling even if they're not looking straight at me.

Sorry, tangent again.

I never wear makeup, don't really bother with my hair, HATE dresses.

I may get my nails painted once in a while, but that's all.

It never ceases to amaze me, this need of certain people, to taunt and make miserable, those who are challenged in some way. I remember being taunted in school about facial tics. I wonder if any of the herd who taunted me, had even one instant of compassion, before eagerly following the example of the pack leader?

When I think of grooming, I think of poodles getting their hair clipped and brush and their nails trimmed, stuff like that.

I take showers, wash my hair, wear deodorant, shave when my facial hair gets wild and clip my nails when they get too long. I wouldn't shave if I could grow a cool beard, though.