problems with being around other people- reasons? research?

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misslottie
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29 Dec 2009, 3:42 pm

probaly the worst aspect of my a.s is being around other people,a nd id like to udertsnad it a little more--- is there a correct term for this? and any speculation about a cause? is there any research on this?

i realise my high stress levels when im out come from being unable to process noise/ visual movement/ unexpected things etc- but can see no reason why simply BEING physically near someone would tire or stress or depress anyone.

ok, so i know it will all sound hideously Dr Who? ish, but it kind of makes sense...

i once heard someone explain that people with claustrophobia have 'really big auras' and thus felt that enclosed spaces were bumping into them ('rubbing their aura') more than other people with 'thinner' auras. though i hesitate to believe such out and out hippy-ness, could there be something in this?

i have the common a.s trait of being sensative to atmospheric pressure- and since all living objects have electrical fields to some degree (bioelectricty), could we just be actually feeling that (which'd effectivly be an 'aura' after all)??
it would also suggest why i - and some others?- are more tired and stressed by the presence of adults, even if we like them, than children (who would possibly have a weaker field, being smaller? though would they fact that they are growing more than adults give them in fact a stronger charge???)

DO we (aspies) have markedly different bioelectrical signals? any treatments anyone's tried for this? copper bangles? ionisers? anything???????
thanks.
;-)



LiendaBalla
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29 Dec 2009, 4:30 pm

Emotions play a factor, so I guess yes in some way. Some of these situations remind me of a pop quize, and the emotions that go with it. The person doesn't know everything, so they wound up thinking real hard so as to get it right. In the end, they finish feeling like they excorsized more than usual, but went nowhere. The human brain does that. My mom comes home feeling real tired sometimes, because her brain worked harder than her body all day on math problems that she has to get right.

The verbal folk usualy tell us we look like we aren't paying attention, or we don'treply the way the need, so they just assume nothing is going on in our minds. At least that's just what it seems like to me.

misslottie wrote:
DO we (aspies) have markedly different bioelectrical signals? any treatments anyone's tried for this? copper bangles? ionisers? anything???????
thanks.
;-)


I don't know. We are different. :wink:

My thoughts.



Last edited by LiendaBalla on 29 Dec 2009, 4:43 pm, edited 3 times in total.

millie
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29 Dec 2009, 4:36 pm

Human beings are the least static and most changeable things on the planet!
We ASD people have brains wired for comparatively static forms of comprehension, and communication and we often find it difficult to absorb multi-channel information. (sight, sound, talk, touch, smell, verbal etc etc etc.)
that is my take on it, based on my own experience.

the most threatening thing for us can be the ever-changing human being!! !! !! !! !! !! !! !

I think it has something to do with our processing.

I don't mind people in the background, but that is at home. I don't like going out too much to new envrionments or with lots of people where i have to absorb so much information. it's just darn tiring.



misslottie
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29 Dec 2009, 4:52 pm

thank you both!

millie, for me its not related to anxiety about reacting to people. i am really physically tired by people- i hated growing up and being in the same room as my family- luckily my bedroom was out on the edge of the house, so i stayed in there and was alone.
school and college and university exhausted me from the daily nearness of others, even if i liked them.

its not a pyschological or processing thing for me- its really proximity to people- sharing a bed, or room, would be out of the question for more than a couple of nights. i just need to be some distance away from people, and preferably unseen by them.
i had hysterics on holiday when i had to share a bed for one night once (because id been with my family all day long for a week already)- i was 14. another holiday slept on the sofa rather than share a room with my sister, another time making her do it.
'making a fuss/being dificult again'...

it is a physical reaction- like goosebumps and nausea from nails on a blackboard. even if they are still and silent, people drain me.



millie
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29 Dec 2009, 5:08 pm

misslottie wrote:
thank you both!

millie, for me its not related to anxiety about reacting to people. i am really physically tired by people- i hated growing up and being in the same room as my family- luckily my bedroom was out on the edge of the house, so i stayed in there and was alone.
school and college and university exhausted me from the daily nearness of others, even if i liked them.

its not a pyschological or processing thing for me- its really proximity to people- sharing a bed, or room, would be out of the question for more than a couple of nights. i just need to be some distance away from people, and preferably unseen by them.
i had hysterics on holiday when i had to share a bed for one night once (because id been with my family all day long for a week already)- i was 14. another holiday slept on the sofa rather than share a room with my sister, another time making her do it.
'making a fuss/being dificult again'...

it is a physical reaction- like goosebumps and nausea from nails on a blackboard. even if they are still and silent, people drain me.


misslottie, I know EXACTLY the reaction you are talking about. I think it is still related to our sensory processing - a sensory overload.
What happens with the blackboard and fingernails? it's a heightened sensory reaction.
it's the same for me around people. My brain goes into sensory overload. I get the same tension and a prickling after a while.
Have you explored sensory processing issues as part of your presentation?

It may be worth doing so. When i spoke about this stuff with my psych I discovered many others of his ASD clients also experienced this kind of thing.

I do not mind people in proximity - but too close and touching or sitting too close and it is a physical/sensory reaction of intense overload.



misslottie
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29 Dec 2009, 5:17 pm

hey millie- thanks.
;-) yes, i do have blackout curtains/earplugs etc. i do get sensory overload, esp from vision.

but ii dont think its a sense thing in that way- more to do with people being in the same room/house as me, rather than a wardrobe or bed being near me. eve if they are asleep, i am still annoyed.

that's what i ment about the electric field....i still feel them.



millie
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29 Dec 2009, 5:32 pm

exactly. :)

It sounds as if you are picking up on their electric field.
I think we extend out a lot further than our bodies, and we also pick up on things that others do not.
in this respect i think some of us on the spectrum are more like animals...picking up on electric fields, high frequencies.

I think we are describing the same things but using different terminologies.
In my view, this is still related to heightened sensory processing...similar to a highly attuned animal. It may be due to differences in the way our neurotransmitters conduct and pick up on information. Where is LabPet when we need her? she can explain some of this kind of thing scientifically.

do you hear high frequency sounds others around your cannot hear?



prism_tail_rainbows
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29 Dec 2009, 5:46 pm

i still don't really understand the concept of "sensory overload," i'm not even sure i've ever experienced that. can anyone provide some, like.. specific or common examples? i'd have no issues being around people if it weren't for my constant self-awareness and exhausting self-consciousness. if i liked myself i think i could like being around other people, i'm not sure if it's got to do anything with "sensory overload."



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29 Dec 2009, 5:55 pm

misslottie wrote:
i once heard someone explain that people with claustrophobia have 'really big auras' and thus felt that enclosed spaces were bumping into them ('rubbing their aura') more than other people with 'thinner' auras. though i hesitate to believe such out and out hippy-ness, could there be something in this?

i have the common a.s trait of being sensative to atmospheric pressure- and since all living objects have electrical fields to some degree (bioelectricty), could we just be actually feeling that (which'd effectivly be an 'aura' after all)??
;-)



A similiar discussion came up here about a year ago, and I'm sure you would not be surprised at just how many people described their social anxieties as being due at least in part to a sort of "Psychic Noise" level that makes crowded rooms unbearable and specific individuals more difficult to even be around than others. Years before I ever heard of AS, I used to think of one certain person in my life as a "Psychic Vampire" because I could feel when they came home, even if I was in another room with the music turned up - I would feel instantly drained, stressed and completely on edge. The atmosphere throughout the house changed perceptibly as soon as their key hit the lock. So I don't find such notions as particularly 'Hippy-ish' at all. 8O



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29 Dec 2009, 6:09 pm

I am currious now. Often merely being around people does seem to drain me. I am also very sensitive to electromagnetic fields - laundry equipment, electrical transmission lines, power plants, computer labs, etc make me nausious (sp?). Also, the frequency response of my hearing is almost two octaves larger than the average bloke.

I have noticed, however, that I usually don't get drained as quickly/severely when arround other spectrum types.



misslottie
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30 Dec 2009, 9:43 am

ooh- thanks all! ;-)

prism_tail_rainbows- sensory overload is when you see too much stuff, and it starts to freak you out. like the belt moving in checkout in a supermarket for some reason drives me mad - the one after the cashier, where you pack up. the normal one is fine for some reason. or- once i was on the top deck of the bus, and looked down to a eally busy street, and felt i was starting to feel anxious- have a meltdown possibly- so put my hands over my eyes. its too much information coming in through one of your senses adn causing a problem. like trying to listen to several important conversations simultaniously with a background of screaming children- its just a bit much.

millie- yes, ok- i finally get what you mean. sorry- i was a bit dim last night!

willard- i kind of agree. ive always tried to keep reflections on this type of thing to a minimum, as it led to speculations that i was schitzophrenic. i experiance to a small degree what you speak of, but my problems with being around people is a more general, separate thing.

Kaysea- yep! me too- i dont have a fridge or hoover- but i thought this was because i hate the noise and vibration from them- hadnt thought to link it to electrical fields in general. dont know about being ok around other asd's- never met any, really.

never noticed anything special about my hearing, though- i just have teh a.s annoyance with noise in general.

im phytosensative, and feel much better at night.
i always thought it wasnt just due to lower light, noise and vibration levels (from traffic and machines) but also to much lower levels of 'thoughts' etc about too... damn it, still impossible not to sound like im Dr Who?

but is there a term for this? any suggestions for treating it? do i need a foil hat to protect me from brain waves?!?! (doubtless- yes!)



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30 Dec 2009, 1:19 pm

Kaysea wrote:
I am currious now. Often merely being around people does seem to drain me. I am also very sensitive to electromagnetic fields - laundry equipment, electrical transmission lines, power plants, computer labs, etc make me nausious (sp?). Also, the frequency response of my hearing is almost two octaves larger than the average bloke.

I have noticed, however, that I usually don't get drained as quickly/severely when arround other spectrum types.


The only close friends I've ever had were people whom I now suspect fell somewhere on the spectrum - the only times socializing gives me that 'energized' feeling others talk about is when I can connect with someone else who shares similar specialized obsessions. And there's beer. :wink:

About the hearing thing - I never thought of myself as having unusual hearing abilities until after reading the line in the DSM that says (of Aspies) "May see lights and hear sounds that others do not" which I first took to mean hallucinations of some sort, and it quite puzzled me.

Later, I recalled an incident in which I mentioned to a group of people once a sound that old-fashioned vacuum-tube televisions used to make all the time, even with the volume off, and they all (but one) looked at me like I'd suddenly switched languages in mid-conversation. We were all about the same age and I'd been hearing this noise as long as I could remember - it was so common to me, this was the first time I'd ever bothered to mention it out loud - I thought everybody heard that. Apparently not, since it's supposed to be too high frequency for the range of normal human hearing.

Then, I began to recall several other instances in which I'd heard a noise to which others around me seemed oblivious - in many cases they were unable to hear the sound even after I pointed it out, and they weren't hallucinations, because in every instance I could clearly identify the source, even walk right over to the (electronic) device responsible and say "Here - don't you hear that?" - and they'd just shake their heads and say "No...I don't hear anything"...how can they not?? It's perfectly audible (even irritating) to me.