Ever want to move out, but circumstances prevent?

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Do family issues/disagreements/views about AS/your interests/life make you want to leave home, but your circumstances prevent you?

What are these circumstances? Are the due to economic causes? Lack of transportation or driving ability? Family Disapproval? Physical and/or emotional fears? Present commitments?

How do they hold you back? Or for how long?

What do you imagine life would be like in freedom? Advantages? Drawbacks?

I lived "on my own" when I was in school and for a few years afterward.

Moved back in with parents when I was planning to go to vocational school that would last 8 months. Changed my mind.

I kept meaning to move out, but economically, with what's going on, I feel better staying at home and paying them rent. It's cheaper, I eat better, and if I get something good to move on to, I'm not tied down to a lease agreement.

I do want to move out. There are many reasons.
The main one is money. I don't work and it's been impossible to get a job. I get disability payments now but that won't be forever, nor do I want it to be. I feel secure living with a parent, in case something breaks in the house (like once the tap broke and I didn't know what to do).
I pay rent to my mum and she does she shopping, cleaning and cooking (even though I keep telling her I can prepare my own meals).
I still don't think I'm ready to take on the responsibility of living alone, and I don't want to live in a share house.

There have been family threats to have me kicked out and sadly I remember as a child saying I couldn't wait till I was 18 to move out (I'm going on 24) Right now I say finances plus what would I do. Ya live alone MAYBE buy a pet (I'm 23 not a 63 yr. old cat lady SHEESH!) While other Aspies are content closing themselves from the world I'm not done GIVING UP HOPE!! !! !! !! The perfect idea IMO would be a roommate (One preferably would understand my quirks and perhaps hanging out with said person and maybe an animal) I wouldn't mind company I'm not some need to be alone person as other Aspies here on WP (that's fine if you are but I'm wanting to live a little and meet people!!)

I would if I had a new job and transportation. Social anxiety holds me back as well however.

I want to move out! But I can't do all household chores at home. And I don't hold a job.

Sigh.

I should add my fear and anxiety about change holds me back somewhat.

Why fear? Change is good sometimes, especially if we live by ourselves with no fear of what Mom says about our rooms...

I don't like change. I don't know what it will be like so I become anxious. It's something that I can't control. I can slowly adapt to it, but I can't just one day decide to leave and pick up from there. It involves a great deal of planning. My friend just moved to Sydney after talking about the idea of moving a week ago, whereas 6 months is still not enough time for me to move.
I hate going to new locations. It makes me anxious.

It's not that I want to move out, because I don't live with my parents I live with my BF, but I do want to move away (from a crummy student-level apartment) and we are stopped from doing it.. mostly because we both graduated right as the economy got horrible. He found a job, but I'm having trouble getting one. D: (I don't drive and I am very bad at interviews and not confident in my ability to do new jobs... these are my main weaknesses I think) If I get a job though, we'll be making more money than we're spending, so hopefully we'll be able to get away soon. :3 I'm trying to learn some skills on my own that might give me more options.

I desperately want to move out because my parents have absolutely no respect for me and still think of me as a child, even though I'm 20. I can't afford to move out and still continue going to college, so I'm thinking about finishing up my associates degree, getting a better job this summer, moving out before my 21st birthday, and going back for my bachelor's in a year or so.

But this won't happen most likely since I don't have the social skills required to get through an interview (I only got the part-time job I have now because I was basically offered the job before my boss even met me and the interview was really just a technicality. And every other job I've had was a similar situation - I just happened to know the right person at the right time. I've never gotten a job that I actually applied and interviewed for.)

I want to move out badly but lack of funds holds me back.

I'd like to move out, but since I'm underemployed at the moment because of the economy and my AS making interviews nearly impossible, I'm at home. The only job I could get in this economy was in fast food, and with business being really slow over the holiday season, my hours were cut drastically.

It's alright, just wait for brighter and better days. And they will come.

It's Southern California anyway and it's a robust economy. It will eventually thrive.

I wanna move out but I'm 15 and don't have sufficient capital yet. I'd love to live on my own and not get bossed around by my mum all the time, though. I hate how she always tells me socialise more and makes me do everything her way instead of a way I like and am comfortable - BTW, her only "reasoning" for that is "that's what everyone else does"... Well if everyone else jumped off a cliff...

I do live on my own, but I don't. Like I don't live with my mom (having kids make it easier for her to not want me in her house...lol), but she does help me out financially at times (more often than what I'm comfortable with). I really want to be where I can take care of her, and I'm making steps to doing that. Back in the day, I thought I was never going to be able to live on my own. I made a couple attempts and moved back in with mom. The one success I finally had was joining the military, and I highly suggest it to people who are able to do so. It's a perfect transition from dependency to independency. You deal with a lot of BS, but you would deal with that anywhere.



My suggestion to people who are interested in moving out and being independent...

First off, your Aspergers isn't going to hold you back. Only your own attitude is going to do that. But it is harder because of the Aspergers, IMO.

Second, research is something we are good at, and you are better off to really research what you do before you do it. Instead of looking up info on your special interest, try looking up info on managing your money or info on what should be on the lease and what shouldn't when renting an apartment.

I highly suggest looking into banking with USAA. I was told you don't have to be military in order to bank with them (like you do for auto insurance), and they have a great financial advice center.

I also suggest anyone getting ready to rent to make sure you get a decent landlord. You have to be pickier than they are about their tenants because the laws are really geared to their favor, and it's too easy for one to screw you over. No matter how nice they are, still treat it like business... take pictures of the place before you move in, have them sign off on what is already wrong with the place, read the lease carefully and change things you don't agree with before signing (some landlords will negotiate with what's on the lease and what's not), etc. If you find a good landlord, they will help you out on maintenance. Some places (especially state funded ones) will do more maintenance than others, but a good landlord will at least tell you how to fix something or who to call to pay to fix it if they don't fix it themselves. If you are in the states, I highly suggest trying to find a state funded facility (not totally low income, but some sort of income based housing) because they are generally better maintained due to stipulations in the grant money. Know that it's your responsibility to create a safe environment (such as keeping fire extinguishers and working smoke detectors) and to have renter's insurance.

Be prepared and save in advance. Like if you can plan moving out for a couple years before actually moving out, and you can make it a long term goal, then you will want to start preparing. You will want an emergency savings of at least 3-6 months of what you would need to live (rent, utilities, food, etc.), as well as about $1,000 in savings for things that just pop up like your car breaks down, as well as what you would need for your security deposit and first month's rent (as well as what you would need if you decide to go on a shopping spree for decorations, kitchen appliances, etc.). While you are creating this savings, you are also creating a lifestyle where you save, and know that you will never be done saving. Trust me, it's much easier to save like this when you live with parents than when you are living on your own.

Try to not make any decisions out of desperation, and plan that some day, you might be in a desperate situation. If you are living with your parents, things might be grand right now, but someday, you might be in a desperate situation to be on your own (whether by your choice or acts of the cosmic powers that be). In addition, if it is very unbearable now, moving out on a whim isn't easy. You really have to try to determine if things are worse off for you now than if you ran away from home. If you can stomach the situation for a while, plan for it with savings and a good job (maybe school is a good thing right now, and maybe you don't need it).

Either way, sorry a mouthful and somewhat not relevant to the OP, but I figure it might help someone out.