can people with asperger's be trendy?

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acesnof
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02 May 2011, 3:18 am

what im trying to ask is, how normal can someone with AS really seem?
i think i have AS sometimes, and i want you to tell me if you think i do.. heres a bit about me

okay, on the outside i seem really normal....

i dress very trendy. (skater type clothes) im 20 years old
i drive a scion tc (gift from my dad)
i am average looking
i try to look 'cool' (like a lot of others my age), i have piercings and ear gauges
i go to clubs, raves, and parties
i have had 12 sexual partners

now here's the weird part.... and this is what nobody sees (which is the part that makes me think i have AS)
i'm pretty much a loner. i have maybe 1 friend, if i can even call him a friend.. but i have a lot of aquiantances..they never hit me up though.
i often feel 'slow' on the social general consensus... like when im in public, i don't really 'get' whats going on, or atleast thats what it feels like, it could be ADHD or just that i'm socially unexperienced.. or anxiety.. who knows..
one of my ex's said "no one even likes you, you're BORING"
i used to weigh like 245 lbs in high school.. i didnt talk to any girls basically, and i didnt really hangout with any people besides my long time friends.
in high school my favorite thing to do was play world of warcraft ALL DAY. socializing didnt interest me much unless it was about video games.
it wasn't until after high school, i lost a ton of weight, quit playing computer games, and started going out that i started seeing girls and hooking up.
but even though i go out and stuff i always feel awkward. like everybody knows something i dont..

so what im trying to say is, does a person with asperger's do all this? is he trendy like me? does he get laid like me? does he try to fit in like me?

do i have asperger's or am i just a trendy loner???



DGuru
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02 May 2011, 3:38 am

Could be Asperger's.

One thing I've observed is anything generally associated with Asperger's will be the opposite for some.

Most are picky eaters, but if an Aspie was obsessed with the culinary arts or connoiseurship the individual would probably be a more adventurous eater. Personally I find trying new tastes fascinating, so am often adventurous with food, but at the same time there's things most people like that I hate.

Most aren't that concerned with what's "trendy" but someone could find a style intensely interesting and then they would outdo NTs in attention to detail over the trend. So the question here is how much do you put into your "skater" style and trying to be "cool"?

An Aspie can also become obsessed with fitting in. Being able to fit in when you have to is a good thing, but obsessing over fitting in will just stress you out and you might forget who you are.



AllieKat
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02 May 2011, 3:41 am

There's a saying if you've met one person with AS,.............you've met one person with AS. Although I personally can't stand dressing trendy, going to clubs, and that kinda thing, it doesn't mean that all Aspies feel that way. I think most of us have tried to fit in at one point or another. And yes, many Aspies do a good job at faking NT and fitting in.

My thoughts are that, yeah, you could be a trendy Aspie. It's like one someone once told me that "I can't be Aspie" because I've volunteered for good causes and Aspies are not supposed to have empathy. BTW- I am the total opposite of trendy but I also knew a NT woman who has outstanding social skills who also is anti-trendy. IMO, Aspies are as diverse in their tastes and personalities as NTs.

Anyway, welcome to WP

Allie Kat
http://www.myaspergerslifestory.com/



acesnof
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02 May 2011, 3:49 am

YES!! !
this is what i have suspected...

after i lost weight and started dressing nicer, i feel like ive become obsessed with it.

then i started wondering whats wrong with me because i couldnt socilize normally... i looked up AS, and saw that they get obsess with things. then i wondered, well, what if my obsession is something so basic like clothes? i didnt think it would be possible because i thought everyone just thinks about clothes all the time..

but honestly im always looking at how people dress so i can pick up new styles and stuff. and as far as being "cool", i try to do that but not as much as being trendy.. i guess in terms of being cool i obsess over trying to get that perfect "cluuber/raver" look that people over here recognize... so i do kinda obsess over that too.

i even heard some people talking about me in the line at a club making fun of me saying "oh yeah all my friends at work dress fresh"
as if they are speaking for me...

and at the gym i walked in and i hear some guy go "ok whats everyone wearing"

like they're pretending to speak for me because i dont speak for myself i guess? thats always how people have made fun of me... even my own brother when i was little would always speak for me when i was at home he would just go "im crazy. im so f****n crazy. im gonna kill everyone"

i guess because he thought i was odd? so he speaks for me in that manner...

and also at work someone said "im soooo cool. im sooooooo cool"

its like thats the way people make fun of me, they speak for me.. is that common for people with AS?


so back to the point, yes i am pretty obsessed with skater trendyness. WOW, if i realy do have AS, then what ahorrible thing to focus my energy on... i have a gift and im using it for that? wow.

i really hope i DONT have aspergers though.
oh and i forgot to mention, i also feel as though i haveto 'act' in social situations based on passed experiences. it feels like im just an actor sometimes. isnt that how people with AS feel?

anyways

PLEASE feel free to ask any other questions...



IceCreamGirl
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02 May 2011, 7:38 am

You should go to a diagnostics center. That way, you can really find out if you have AS or not.

BTW, people with AS can fake NT. I used to not care about fitting in, but in seventh grade, I decided that I wanted to act like everyone else. I started to dress better, and I went from almost never socializing to having an active social life.

I used to be severe, but now I'm fairly mild.