I've tried so hard to live in "your" nuerotypical

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from my earliest moments i knew i would have to adjust myself to the fuc**d up world of the typical....uggghhhhh, what a fuc**d up world that is

i just never realized as each passing year goes by how difficult it is to keep on going living this horrible lie and facing ever more burdens in life ,as each moment passes

sometimes i wish i would have been born severe....as to only worry about shittin in my depends as i realize my 50th yr is close


is it better to have lived a life of trying to cope with all of this, rather well for a long time, and burn out... a life of lies that has caught up with me???

is this an autistic mid life crisis??.....s**t i havent a moment for myself than to even think about myself...if it was a mid life, shouldnt i be cruisin with a 23 yr old bimbo?

I'm having some kind of mid-life crisis too, mostly related to my job situation, everything was pretty much linear up to Feb 2008, then I gave up to family pressures (what a mistake) and things took a turn for the worst. Right now I'm trying to set things right again. Summer 2006-Feb 2008 was the best period of my life, moved from my parents' house and just did what I wanted, also had a very well suited job, it was pretty much my ideal life. I want lucidity and direction back again.

Just calm down. Take some time for yourself.
I've been down about things that happen when I try to go out and be social. But then I take time off then try again.
If it's too difficult for you then just forget about it. Be with your special interests.
Do you have any specific issues? Maybe you can get some advice in The Haven.

thanks pen, how are ya?

besides discovering my own aspergers along with my sons autism 6 yrs ago, it has gone down hill
mother has lukemia, she has held up well...but.....

26 yr old nephew died a few yrs ago from cancer

mother in law died in a bad car accident few yrs back

31 yr old nephew now battling lung cancer, we just baptized his baby

53 year old brother in law battling lymphoma

financial pressures of caring for my son and family

nuerotypical society who doesnt give a s**t about nuthin

a lot goin on eh?

Just out of curiousity how old were you when you were diagnosed? I was 6 months from turning 60.

Honestly I am not quite sure what that has done for me other than get frustrated that where ever I live I cannot find any type of help for elderly autistics. Do you find the same? Do you have a clue how angry that gets me?

Just wanted to let you know that I definitely empathize with you.

irene