Staring

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How many of you have a tendency to stare at people? I do it all the time, and 9 out of 10 times it's unintentional and I don't even notice it until others point it out. It also tends to creep a lot of people out, especially people that are my age.

I know I creep people out with my staring. If anybody has any tips for not staring, please let me know. I hate that I do it.

Referring to the video, that made me think she put it there on purpose to have some sort of guilt-tripping power over others.

Poor guy! That is more cleavage than is professional anyway- and the name tag right there!

Anyway, I have always been bad for staring. It got me in trouble a lot in school. I was labeled a lesbian for years in school because I would zone out and it seemed like I was staring at people. I guess it would be mostly girls in my general gazing direction, so I got labeled as "gay". Not that I have anything negative to say about gay people. I am not gay, and this was the late 80s early 90s when not many people were forthcoming about their sexuality, and you know how they were treated. I really tried hard not to get caught anymore, but then I would not even look around sometimes. As an adult I have made people uncomfortable because I do this- once I zoned out at my neighbors' bar-b-q and this lady thought I was staring at her legs, but I was just deep in thought. See- again with the ladies.

I tend to stare at things in general. I don't usually notice what I'm staring at unless something grabs my attention or if what I'm staring at moves. Sometimes it's a person, and I usually feel really embarrassed. Occasionally I'll be looking at someone I find attractive and suddenly realise I've "zoned out" (probably imagining us as a couple ) and they caught me looking at them. I feel even more embarrassed when that happens.

When a clerk or receptionist has been particularly helpful to me, I always try to get a look at their name tag, so I can thank them personally before I go, but I make it a point never to stare at their boobs.



Those I check out with quick sidelong glances, like any other guy...

What you guys said really describe what happens to me quite well. Is this an autism thing?

Do you find that someone's face - if you are sitting in a train, say, and can see lots of people in the carriage - ... someone's face happens to capture your attention and you keep wanting to look at it, as long as they don't notice you? It is like a brief mini-obsession for that train trip - the face of that stranger is the one you want to look at, but you are not at all going to speak to them (that would be difficult to do, seeing they are a stranger). You don't want them to notice you staring, you just want to stare at them unnoticed.

I am not sure if that kind if staring is common to everyone, or an aspie thing, or just me.

^I do that too. Feel drawn to a certain person in a situation and then I want to keep looking at them. But it always feels awkward, like I know I shouldn't be looking but I can't stop myself.

I stare at people. I stare at things. Things are more patient, people like to ask Why do you stare at me? What do you want? They say I stare intensive and I have devil eyes - whatever it is.
Sometimes I stare at sb's face and I try to measure and analyse proportions. It helps me with remember faces, it's my big problem. I have old Antropology book and I compare faces with pictures from it. I analyse also whole body. Sometimes I don't remember face, but I remember body type. Spatial thinking helps me, my family jokes I have scales and meters in eyes.
So if I stare at you:
- I don't know what to do with my eyes
- I'm scanning you!

I understand boy from movie. People like to speak sth and they (pretend?) don't hear the questions. They also are in their own world. If you don't get answer, you have to solve a problem yourself. Sometimes I don't want to ask people and put up with them, so I don't speak, keep quiet and do sth. I can't stand people.

I don't stare much at people. Sometimes I might look at their clothes, if there's come interesting pattern on it. I'm usually not that interested in other people and if I am, I sneak peeks, I don't really stare.

I stare at things more than people. I can find detail in the most simplest of objects.

Staring is a common human phenomena and it is often involuntary, there's a book written about it.

Staring: How We Look (Paperback) by Rosemarie Garland-Thomson

Staring is an natural involuntary reaction that we have no control over, but staring should stop as soon as we see a disapproving look from the subject of our stare. Its only a problem if we don't notice that disapproving look e.g.

I know a guy with AS who stares too much because he doesn't notice that he's upsetting people. Recently, I noticed people were angrily staring back at him, .. they were non-verbally telling him to stop but he didn't notice. I noticed and I told him to stop staring. So I think, staring is only problem if an Aspie doesn't notice if people are getting upset. I don't think I stare too much, as I notice people's reactions when I look at them.

Sometime we can't stop staring, the more we don't want to stare .. the more we stare.
But that happens to everyone, it happened to Austin Powers.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Mvxe04wGmTw[/youtube]

I don't stare at people but I stare at walls, bodies of water, and trees in the distance.

I stare at people sometimes. My eye contact issues prompt me to either avoid a person's gaze or do the exact opposite and stare at like them as if I were looking into their heads. I give people heebies and jeebies like that. I also find I stare at people who for whatever reason capture my attention. I cannot help myself.