Board index › General Discussion › General Autism Discussion

Worst Place for an Aspie to Live?

Page 1 of 3 [ 34 posts ]  Go to page 1, 2, 3  Next

Previous topic | Next topic

lotuspuppy
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 14 Jan 2008
Age: 37
Gender: Male
Posts: 995
Location: On a journey to the center of the mind

10 Jun 2010, 10:18 am

What's the worst place an Aspie can live? It can be either a city, state, or country, depending on your experience. I am considering moving, but am not sure where, yet.



CockneyRebel
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 17 Jul 2004
Age: 51
Gender: Male
Posts: 121,161
Location: In my own little country

10 Jun 2010, 10:41 am

In the inner city, of any city.


_________________
The Family Schlager


Sparrowrose
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 11 Oct 2009
Age: 59
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,682
Location: Idaho, USA

10 Jun 2010, 10:44 am

CockneyRebel wrote:
In the inner city, of any city.


Unless you have lots of money.

A nice classic eight with delivery service for anything you want, a dooman to summon a cab for you when you need or want to go someplace. With enough money, the city can be a much easier place to live than most.

Without lots of money, though, I agree that the inner city truly sucks.


_________________
"In the end, we decide if we're remembered for what happened to us or for what we did with it."
-- Randy K. Milholland

Avatar=WWI propaganda poster promoting victory gardens.


Wuffles
Deinonychus
Deinonychus

User avatar

Joined: 5 Apr 2010
Age: 46
Gender: Female
Posts: 354

10 Jun 2010, 11:27 am

inner city > student area > shared accomodation

look for somewhere independent and quiet, even if it's a bit out of the way.



kx250rider
Supporting Member
Supporting Member

User avatar

Joined: 15 May 2010
Age: 58
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,140
Location: Dallas, TX & Somis, CA

10 Jun 2010, 11:32 am

CockneyRebel wrote:
In the inner city, of any city.


Agreed (worst place). I was born in South Central Los Angeles, went to school in West LA, and have moved as far away from the city as humanly possible... On a 20-acre farm about 50 miles northwest of Los Angeles. However I do live part time in Dallas, which is also a big city, but is also much more friendly to me as an Aspie, than LA ever was.

Ideal place to live? I'd say in a really small farm town, where you can get to know everyone and trust them to understand your differences without thinking you're just weird or undesirable to have around. In the big city, you're either in the "in crowd" or you're an outcast. No in-between.

Sparrowrose wrote:
Unless you have lots of money.



I don't know about that. $5m. penthouse on Park Ave or otherwise, you're still among high-density crowds wherever a cab or driver may take you, which is hell in my Aspie views. One of my inlaws is a very wealthy oil heiress who buys $400,000 Laborghinis on a whim, and she lives a few yards from the Las Vegas Strip. She has reserved parking in all the resorts and for all the shows, and she uses a charter helicopter service. I wouldn't trade my life for hers under any circumstances. After we visit her, my head is pounding, and I need to find a dark, quiet place to go get my heart back in proper rhythm.

Charles



Sparrowrose
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 11 Oct 2009
Age: 59
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,682
Location: Idaho, USA

10 Jun 2010, 11:41 am

kx250rider wrote:
Ideal place to live? I'd say in a really small farm town, where you can get to know everyone and trust them to understand your differences without thinking you're just weird or undesirable to have around. In the big city, you're either in the "in crowd" or you're an outcast. No in-between.


I've had a much harder time in small towns where everyone knows everyone. It's pretty rare to find a small town where people will understand differences without thinking someone is weird, dangerous, or undesirable. In my experience, you pretty much have to grow up there because moving to a small town makes one instantly suspect. Or so my own experience has gone.


_________________
"In the end, we decide if we're remembered for what happened to us or for what we did with it."
-- Randy K. Milholland

Avatar=WWI propaganda poster promoting victory gardens.


kx250rider
Supporting Member
Supporting Member

User avatar

Joined: 15 May 2010
Age: 58
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,140
Location: Dallas, TX & Somis, CA

10 Jun 2010, 11:52 am

Sparrowrose wrote:
I've had a much harder time in small towns where everyone knows everyone. It's pretty rare to find a small town where people will understand differences without thinking someone is weird, dangerous, or undesirable. In my experience, you pretty much have to grow up there because moving to a small town makes one instantly suspect. Or so my own experience has gone.


I guess it depends on the details, and on many things. I usually have no problem gaining trust and understanding of older people; it's my peers and younger, who I have a hard time getting to be on my side. I can see how it could mushroom into a big problem, if an Aspie got MISunderstood by the wrong person at first; such as a popular member of the community who might spread negativity before enough people have a chance to know your character. Positively in any NEW place, where I'm unknown, I'd first try to act as mainstream as possible, and always have a purpose to execute in going downtown. In other words, I wouldn't just go hang out someplace. I'd go to the hardware store for something I need, and something which I have interest and knowledge about. Then I'd probably go to a restaurant with someone who may be a friend who is outgoing and popular, and get myself seen with other accepted people. It's amazing how that works. Whether you join a gym to work out, or you want to be part of a motorcycle weekend riding club, or whether you want a job at Walmart... As an aspie, it's easier to me to be introduced by another person already accepted, than to try to get in on my own rusty people skills.

Charles



lotuspuppy
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 14 Jan 2008
Age: 37
Gender: Male
Posts: 995
Location: On a journey to the center of the mind

10 Jun 2010, 11:52 am

Sparrowrose wrote:
kx250rider wrote:
Ideal place to live? I'd say in a really small farm town, where you can get to know everyone and trust them to understand your differences without thinking you're just weird or undesirable to have around. In the big city, you're either in the "in crowd" or you're an outcast. No in-between.


I've had a much harder time in small towns where everyone knows everyone. It's pretty rare to find a small town where people will understand differences without thinking someone is weird, dangerous, or undesirable. In my experience, you pretty much have to grow up there because moving to a small town makes one instantly suspect. Or so my own experience has gone.


I have to agree with you. I came from a small town, and hated constantly bumping into people I knew. I actually prefer some cities because I am annomenous, except when I want to be known.

I currently live in Washington, DC, which has the worst aspects of a big city and a small town. While it's pretty dense, it's essentially a gigantic company town, and everyone is interested in the other's business. I am a student, so I'm above the fray. However, I see this dynamic all the time.



Tollorin
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 14 Jun 2009
Age: 44
Gender: Male
Posts: 3,178
Location: Sherbrooke, Québec, Canada

10 Jun 2010, 12:44 pm

The worst place will be the "perfect" suburb.


_________________
Down with speculators!! !


Asp-Z
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 6 Dec 2009
Age: 33
Gender: Male
Posts: 11,018

10 Jun 2010, 12:51 pm

Any shared accommodation. Just imagine having no private space and having to socialise all the time. Aspie hell.



Ferdinand
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 27 Feb 2010
Age: 31
Gender: Male
Posts: 4,332
Location: America

10 Jun 2010, 1:34 pm

I like the city. I get happy from hearing all the noise.

The worst place to live, would be prison.


_________________
It don't take no Sherlock Holmes to see it's a little different around here.


Shadowbound
Supporting Member
Supporting Member

User avatar

Joined: 4 May 2007
Age: 46
Gender: Male
Posts: 405
Location: UK, Staffordshire

10 Jun 2010, 2:01 pm

Earth I think.



buriguri
Tufted Titmouse
Tufted Titmouse

User avatar

Joined: 28 May 2010
Age: 46
Gender: Female
Posts: 30

10 Jun 2010, 2:14 pm

Well, I hate the noise of the city, but I think the countryside or small town is worse. I don't have a car right now (and even when I did I hated driving), so I like that I can walk to the grocery store. It's pretty anonymous, and I appreciate that. If I owned a decent amount of land, I would move out into the country because I really want a garden. But I'm stuck as a renter for now, so I'll take city life.



Vanilla_Slice
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 3 Oct 2008
Age: 68
Gender: Male
Posts: 515
Location: Hungary

10 Jun 2010, 3:37 pm

New York or Tokyo. Sensory overload waiting to happen. San Francisco though, that place was like a comfortable pair of old slippers.

Vanilla_Slice



Assembly
Sea Gull
Sea Gull

User avatar

Joined: 28 Feb 2010
Age: 34
Gender: Male
Posts: 225

10 Jun 2010, 3:41 pm

In my house, lol <.<



clumsybee
Deinonychus
Deinonychus

User avatar

Joined: 22 May 2010
Age: 34
Gender: Female
Posts: 398
Location: Syracuse, NY

10 Jun 2010, 3:48 pm

The worst place would probably be a big city living in 3+ people dorms. I live in a small town, and although I hate driving long distances, you won't have to deal with sensory overload that comes from a city full of people and the nagginess of roommates. Weather wise for me it would have to be a nonseasonal place where the humidity is low and it's around 70 degrees daily. If anyone finds that place let me know.