Chameleon Personality

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I had a long talk with someone last night, and they explained that I didn't have much of a personality of my own, they explained it as hyper empathy actually

I put myself in other's shoes so much, I think they are me and act that way. I can't tell what's me or the other person sometimes.

I actually do do this, for example, if I hang out with rude people, I will become rude myself and join in. Are they doing something against my principles? I am easily talked into doing it anyway.

I have a doormat and copying personality... I'm just curious what you guys would say about this.

I first realized I was like that back in college. I tend to act like the person I'm interacting with. Its like I'm a different person depending on who I'm with. What I do now is when I'm interacting with people I don't know, I kind of "channel" the personality of someone I know and respect, depending on the situation. Some people's personalities I don't like, so I tend to avoid being around them, lest I acquire the bad bits of their personality Plus I don't like myself as much then. Some aspects of people's personalities rub off on me.

Is it personality or simple mannerisms and ways of talking? I don't know for myself.

I'm not a doormat but I do have a chameleon personality. It comes from absorbing everything around you. Standing up for myself doesn't come naturally to me though, I was a doormat when I was younger. I can relate with almost anyone and I absorb a lot of personality traits from other people, the media in general, just certain attitudes. I won't act like someone that I think is rude or obnoxios though, not consciously, anyway. I wouldn't really call myself easily influenced because I can judge what I think is appealing or not, if I were hanging around some I found rude/obnoxious I would know that I didn't want to be like them.

Yeah... Trying to separate myself, don't entirely know how. And when I do, I barely interact at all. But, is that necessarily a bad thing? I don't know.
Problem with being a doormat is that I sort of get how they are presenting themselves as. "Oh you need this, there you go." But, I entirely miss their intent or other body language that could clue me in.

Mimcry, I say!

I think that this is normal, to a degree. I tend to modify my behaviour depending on who I'm with. Sometimes more or less of the true me is allowed to play.

I didn't realize I was being a chameleon until I read about it in an article detailing the INTP personality type.

It made a whole lot of sense to me...when I first meet someone and I don't know how they act, I myself don't know how to act...I just use my blank sort of monotone personality and I use really pretentious "big words".

Once I get to really know a person, I find myself copying them in many ways...whether it be their mode of speech, the words they use...eventually I even find myself pronouncing words the same way they do, or making the same facial expressions.

What's really awkward is when I have two different groups of friends hanging out with me at the same time...I don't know who to mimick and it's just...yeah...awkward

What Angnix describes was me exactly when I was younger, but I was never aware of it until I was in my thirties. I had realized that I was so liable to say and do anything to blend in with the group or person I was with that I was not trusted. It was one of the contributing factors to my subsequent reclusive lifestyle. About a year ago, when I started teaching personal leadership, I have gotten a lot farther in learning more indiviuality and integrity.

This is a curious phenomenon.

When I was younger I used to become a vessel for the ideals of the community I currently belonged to. I strived to live up to the official ideals of my community. In school it meant getting good grades. During my (conscriptive) military service I tried to live up to the ideals of what a good soldier and good leader is all about. In hindsight I was following these ideas to naive lengths, which often led to ridicule from my peers since I took everything so seriously.

Nowasdays, I have developed an agenda of my own. Therefore I am less and less suscepticle to absorb the ideals of my environment since my selfish agenda is constantly on my mind. Doesn't mean I don't shapeshift or do chameleon type stuff, but it's more of a conscious choice to try different approaches to situations all in the name of personal development, and ultimately it's just my expression of Nietzsche's "will to power" i.e. self-actualization.

That being said I picked up a lot of traits from my ex-girlfriend, which served me well since she was much more social than I was. Now I'm looking how I can exploit this ability further by finding people whose traits I can absorb for myself, thus increasing my existing skill set.